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Sad about losing uterus Sad about losing uterus

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Unread 05-16-2005, 11:31 AM
Newbies, don't read

Okay, this is deep... I've felt this for awhile, Lord knows I've had along enough time to think about this...but I can't help that I feel like I am being robbed of being a woman. All around me, my friends are popping out children (I'm 35) and I have had my two, but I just held a 2 wk old, and while I don't want another, I feel like my motherhood thing is getting ripped out of me.

Maybe if they were not doing it vag. I would feel different, but thats where my babies came from, where my husband and I have been known to play, its part of me. I feel like I am going to be invaded (ie. raped) and they are going to rip out ME!

The other side can look pretty ugly from here, I know its silly but I don't even know if I'll feel like a woman afterwards. In my head I know it needs to be done, In my head I know I won't be any different, but will I still be ME.

This is just second thoughts from someone who has had to deal with being a wall flower since before Christmas...
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Unread 05-16-2005, 12:24 PM
Sad about losing uterus

Hello, I had some of the same thoughts as you. I must say I really don't feel any different. Even my sex drive is the same, which I was really worried about. I can't wait to get the O.K. but it's normal to have these feeling. I think most women go through these kind of feelings. You are not going to be any less of a woman just because your uterus is gone, trust me! Think of the bright side, NO MORE PERIODS!! That's the best part, believe me!
Unread 05-16-2005, 02:06 PM
Sad about losing uterus

I had those same worries for a while. I was lucky to have two girlfriends who had the surgery long before me - I didn't find HysterSisters site until I was already home on recovery. My girlfriends both reassured me when I was making my surgical decisions that I would be no less a woman. One asked me bluntly "Is that what you think of ME?" Which caught me up short and I sputtered "Well, no!"

Life on "the other side" is actually pretty darned great. I can wear stylish clothing in bright colors because I'm not worried about ruining anything when a flood happens. I don't have to check my office chair every time I get up to be sure I haven't made a mess there, either. I can carry a smaller purse because I'm not always hauling around extra supplies and/or clothes. The glove box of my car isn't filled with supplies that tumble out when someone is looking for a map. I'm not in pain anymore. I'm not anemic anymore so I have more energy. I have a better attitude so I'm easier to live with. I have a much improved sex drive.

If anything, I'm more "woman" now than I was before surgery. I'm certainly more confident and less emotionally needy which lets me deal with Life's curve balls better. I don't need as much makeup to give me a false "look of health" - my skin just glows, my hair is less brittle and healthier looking on its own. Because I won't need transfusions every 6 months and be incapacitated, I can be a more involved grandmother to the toddler in my life.

I'm not saying you shouldn't be sad, or that it's wrong to feel what you're feeling. Feelings aren't wrong, they just "are". I simply want to offer you a hand from someone down the road that went through some of those same worries - that you will eventually feel better. Your improved health will give you a different perspective.

I hope your heart and mind can make peace with one another.

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