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Unread 03-17-2001, 02:39 PM
doctor notes funnies

The following quotes were allegedly taken from actual medical records as
dictated by physicians:

~ By the time he was admitted, his rapid heart had stopped and he was
feeling better.

~ On the second day, the knee was better and on the third day it had
completely disappeared.

~ The patient has been depressed ever since she began seeing me in 1983.

~ Patient was released to outpatient department without dressing.

~ Discharge status: Alive but without permission.

~ The patient refused an autopsy.

~ The patient's medical history has been remarkably insignificant with only
a 40 pound weight gain in the past three days.

~ She slipped on the ice and apparently her legs went in separate directions
in early December.

~ The patient had waffles for breakfast and anorexia for lunch.

~ She is numb from the toes down.

~ The skin was moist and dry.

~ When she fainted, her eyes rolled around the room.
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Unread 03-17-2001, 02:47 PM
doctor notes funnies

Unread 03-17-2001, 03:41 PM
doctor notes funnies

I was a bit amused until I got to the "fell on the ice", then started laughing and couldn't stop. Tears rolling down my cheeks by the last one. Thanks!
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Unread 03-17-2001, 04:24 PM
doctor notes funnies

ROFLMAO! Thanks...that was too cute!
Unread 03-17-2001, 04:44 PM
doctor notes funnies

Way too funny, Rose!!!

A lot funnier than the snafu from auto insurance companies!
Unread 03-17-2001, 05:42 PM
doctor notes funnies


I really needed that!
Thanks, Rose...
Unread 03-17-2001, 09:18 PM
doctor notes funnies

That reminds me:

Mental note: Refuse Autopsy

thanks for the laugh!
Unread 03-17-2001, 09:22 PM

I am a medical transcriptionist and love bloopers like these. I once heard a doctor say "no heavy activity with the right breast." I sent it in to receive a free medical bloopers calendar. When I need a break and/or a laugh at work, I just start reading my blooper calendar.
Unread 03-17-2001, 10:46 PM
doctor notes funnies

Unread 03-17-2001, 11:09 PM

I just wanted to say that was great. I needed a laugh.
If you have any more---do share them.

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