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Nothing to look forward to Nothing to look forward to

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  #1  
Unread 01-05-2006, 11:00 PM
Nothing to look forward to

It has been a long time since I have visited hystersisters-since 11/4/05, infact. Had TAH/RSO 9/13/05. Thought I was doing fine, no problems. Now, I feel really sad, lonely and scared. At that time I was looking forward to the holidays, I hosted Christmas this year. I moved into a new house. But now that the excitement of Thanksgiving, Christmas and the New Year is over, I feel a big fat nothing. Well, not really nothing cause I am sad. I have cried everyday this week. I didn't even cry that much right after my hyst. I am divorced with no children. I have my dog, Abby, that I adore and love with all my heart. But I just feel like I am suspended in air with no where to go. I have started to notice that I am losing alot of hair, my doctor had told me that was a possibility but it is still scary. I have rather fine hair as it is, and I don't really "need" to lose any. My dosage of Estradiol is working great, no symptoms. Although my family is wonderful and I wouldn't trade them, they just don't understand. They all say, "get over it". None of the ladies in my family have had a hyst, so they cannot relate to what it is like. I started a new workout dvd, thinking that would make me feel better, which is does physically, but I just have that pit in my stomach. And if one more person tells me not to worry about not having kids because I can adopt....I am going to explode. Anyway, thank you for listening....I am glad I came back. This is the best place for support!! I wish everyone a wonderful new year!!
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  #2  
Unread 01-05-2006, 11:47 PM
Nothing to look forward to

Hi Blinky1470,

Welcome back!! As long as you have Hyster Sisters, you have friends. You believe that!!

And you spend as much time with Abby as you can. I just lost my 20 yr. old cat Figaro, a year and a half ago and it still hurts. I just have to remember all the good times we had together. He was my best bud. My little man.

I can honestly say most of the time I am an animal person instead of a people person. Animals just understand more when we need some love.

And family?? Oh yeah...those people. They mean the best when they say "get over it" and that is easy for them to say when they did not have a life changing experience like you and me.

Any time I get down, and it happens....believe me, I just try to think of what lies ahead in the future. We have our whole lives in front us and a ~quality of life~ to boot being Hyster Sisters. Just try to think of the positives and not the what-ifs. And adopting?? You are already a full time mom to Abby. That in my book is very important!!

You hang in there. Best wishes,

Mary
  #3  
Unread 01-06-2006, 11:39 AM
Nothing to look forward to

Hi Blinky! I'm glad you knew just where to turn when you needed a I'm so sorry you are sad
Please, ask your doctor to check your thyroid levels. That could be the cause of your hair falling out. I've never heard of it as "normal" after a hyst but I'm not very knowledgable when it comes to hormones. In the mean time, reaching out to others is so very helpful. Your fur friend is very lucky to have you. We have two labs that are so sweet, I wonder how we ever did without them.
I hope you get through your sad times soon but if you find it's not a passing thing, don't hesitate to see your doctor. Our bodies change so often that it's important to keep our check-ups. Keep in touch. It's nice to have you back. I'm sure there are others here that can learn from your hyst experience.
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  #4  
Unread 01-06-2006, 12:16 PM
Nothing to look forward to

I wish you peace today. (And warm fuzzies from lots of "friends" here).

I have a card beside my bed and will probably have it there until I die. It is a nice like poem about peace of heart. It basically says that peace of heart comes slowly and creeps in and one day it is just there. I have found little glimpses of peace as time passes and it is my prayer that you will find them too.

Big hug!
  #5  
Unread 01-06-2006, 12:38 PM
Nothing to look forward to

Dear (((Blinky))),
Well first of all, welcome back

Sometimes I think a lot of little things can combine to pitch us into that black hole of hopeless feelings, particularly if you have been extra busy and occupied and then it suddenly ends. That's why post holiday let down is so universal.
SO...my advice is plan something-anything to look forward to.
This year I'm going to have a Valentine making party with some girlfriend's and turn it into a Queen of Hearts Tea. We're going to spend an afternoon chatting and noshing and loving ourselves and each other. I can't tell you how much the thought of this party and planning it is helping me over the winter blahs.

I don't plan to adopt and I don't have kids and I wanted them very much. Adoption is not an option that everyone wants to pursue. And yes, the loss of potential children leaves a very big hole in my heart. Guess my challenge is to find other ways to fill it.
So, keep on loving Abby and find a way to do something new to keep occupied and when you feel sad come here for a hug (or three. )
We all have big shoulders if you need a cry. And check out the thyroid thing for sure!!!
I hope you feel better every day. Much love , light and many blessings to you!
  #6  
Unread 01-06-2006, 10:54 PM
Nothing to look forward to

Mary, Karlene, Muchtoyoung and BBQ-thank you so much for the replies. It made me feel much better. I talked to my doctor today, she said that hair loss is mostly a result of stress and depression-imagine that!! She told me to try a shampoo called Nioxin, which I have actually been using for 2 weeks already. She said to give it a few more weeks (shampoo) then re-evaluate. If there hasn't been any improvement, she said to see a dermatologist. She made no mention of the thyroid issue. I always have Abby come up on the bed with me and we cuddle together. She is very good therapy!! I am thankful everyday that I have her....And I am thankful that I came back to my hystersisters!! Once again, this website has proven more wonderful than words can say...thank you so much ladies!! You are very special to me...XOXO
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