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Can someone please listen to me? Can someone please listen to me?

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Unread 01-30-2006, 10:22 PM
Can someone please listen to me?

I understand completely. I am trying to prepare for my surgery ( Feb.10 ) and a wonderful nurse called me and asked me to consider speaking with a counselor after my operation. When I told this to my mother, (who I live with) her response was, " For what? That's ridiculous!" and stated that she had a hysterectomy in her 20's and I should just "get over it". And she has already told me that she was up and around after 2 days, so I should be the same way. I think it is hard for people to understand that others have different emotions. Please know that the we are going through this together. I will be thinking of you and hoping you get the at home care that you will need.
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Unread 01-30-2006, 10:31 PM
Can someone please listen to me?

I am six days post-op and know the anxiety you are speaking of. I finally decided to look at it like I was going in the hospital to have a baby. It is the only other reason I have ever been in the hospital. I figure I did not stress about that too much so why worry about surgery. Both were painful but necessary events. Both brought relief and comfort into my life. This will consume you if you let it. You do not have too. I finally decided to look at it in a very positive manner. Sure I was scared. However, the day of surgery I was sooooo calm and everything turned out far better than I could ever imagine. I have been doing laundry, reading, cooked dinner (we have 5 kids), did homework with the children, etc. It is stressful when people around you act like it is no big deal because it is. However, why worry about something that you have very little control over. I prayed that God would be my surgeon that day and put it totally in his hands. You will have the support you need. People are just trying to make you feel better but in the wrong way. It is alright to be a little worried and stressed just don't let it consume you. YOu have lot's of support here. Oh and yes......waiting is the worst part. I waited 3 1/2 months and in ways it was good and in other ways it was just long and drawn out. Keep the faith! Tis good to finally be on the other side!
Unread 01-30-2006, 10:55 PM
Can someone please listen to me?

Aww I totally understand how you feel and felt the same before I had my surgery one year ago. I think our loved ones and friends who never went through it....well are just clueless or possibly nervous and do not know what to say yanno? So they tell you what they think you want to hear but in reality all we want is someone to just listen to us vent and support us. I wish I had found this site before my surgery as the support and understanding here is amazing.
I meditatedbefore surgery as I was told by my doctor that you do need to have a possitive outlook before surgery as it will benefit your recovery. Hard to relax I know but I did yoga as I was so anxious the weeks leading up to surgery that I was scared to death....lost sleep and worried about my kiddies since I am a single mom. Luckily I had lots of help from my mom and dad with helping out so that was a huge relief. If you need to vent or just chat...feel free to PM anytime as I would be more then happy to listen.
Good luck to you all with your upcomiong surgeries...I will keep you in my prayers. word of advice. Do not try to leave the hospital earlier then the dr advises...I did that and once home I wish I had not begged for him to let me go home a day earlier. Yes I know hospitals are no fun but once I was home..,, I missed my hospital bed with the buttons to go up/down not to mention rails to help you get up and down. LOl they should send all post hystos home with one IMO.
My nurses were the best have no idea what a difference a nurse can make in recovery. Please take it easy once you are home.
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Unread 01-30-2006, 10:56 PM
Can someone please listen to me?

I know exactly what you mean, my surgery is in about a week but everyone I seem to talk to knows someone or has had one themselves and it's always no big deal .....whatever. It's a big deal to me!
Unread 01-30-2006, 11:12 PM
Can someone please listen to me?

Originally Posted by chanale
I can't begin to tell you how frustrated I am. I am really nervous about my surgery. I am nervous about what they will find, how I will feel and extra extra nervous about how my children 2 years and 1 year old will fare through this.
My Husband is amazing. But here's my issue....... I am SO tired of people saying to me, "you'll be fine!"
Okay, How do they know? I have to wait until March for this surgery and I don't feel well now, bleeding heavily and just have nio energy.
I have a friend who is pregnant, so she is getting lots of attention, my other friends is moving and the ohter one has her own cancer issues. I feel like this is "just another surgery" and to me it is NOT.
Am I being unreasonable? Oh and here's the best line from my dear mother........ Your surgery isn't until March, maybe you can let go of it for a while. Let go of it?
Yes dear girl Im feeling you right now. I didnt admit it a month ago, but yes the wait is killer. Im personally very angry about it to. My mother says ohh your sick. Be nicer to the ones around you. Remember when you are sick you are more witch(with a b) I really feel my doctor isnt doing enough. When I had my csection they sewed my inciscion to other things. Now that things are moving downward my scar is hurting too. Im angry at everyone and it comes across. Then Im upset that Im hurting those around me. I keep trying to be superwoman to make up for it. Which makes me feel worse cause I work to hard and hurt myself. It isn't really me I concluded. Its the wait. If they had gotten me in any where from then to 6 weeks I wouldnt have had the time to feel icky or to over think things. All I can say is I wish I could give you a hug. I do feel you right now. Now that my time is getting closer. Im getting even more anxious.
Unread 01-30-2006, 11:34 PM
Can someone please listen to me?

good luck to all the ladies in waiting i am 2 weeks post op and was just as nervous as you yes it is a big deal i spent 4 days in the hospital and things have been slow for me every day i can do a little more but am very tired and hurt everyone is different some are up and running in a few days others take weeks the most important thing i learned is to get help dont overdue remember you will have internal stitches that need to heal and bending ,lifting is a no no there is a article about adhesions in post op that i really found informative about why it is so important to take it easy and dont do to much to soon the surgery is a breeze the first week is not just take it slow and rest it is hard with kids please find help my dgd is such a big help she is 7 and lives with us my dh is a big help to i have had to learn to let certain things go since i like a really clean house but i also realize that we only have one chance to heal right take it one day at a time some will be good some will be bad but together we will get thru it bye
Unread 01-30-2006, 11:35 PM
Can someone please listen to me?

I know what you mean, most people are telling me it'll be a breeze, don't worry about it. The few who haven't don't want to talk to me at all about it. It's too scary for them to think about it. All that goes through my mind is how do you think I feel. I'm afraid someday I might just scream out listen to me,hear me, I'm scared. The most support I've gotten outside of this web site is from my husband. I also have 3 mentally retarded foster adults that I take care of and I worry that they are going to be afraid and act up for the woman I've hired to stay with them while I'm in the hospital. So I know what you are going through. Any time you need to talk PM. Until then try to keep your spirits up and I'm sending you lots of hugs.
Unread 01-30-2006, 11:53 PM
Can someone please listen to me?

Hi There! I just want to encourage you as you are in this season of your life. I am scheduled to go in this Friday, Feb 3rd for a surgery! I also have young children, 9, 3, and 11 months. I have Lupus and Severe Endometriosis. The lathargic feeling is awful! From someone who can related to where you are, hang in there. What's that old saying...This too shall pass....
It will. What i have been thinking about lately is for me, how will this go? I know so many women have great experiences. I am praying that I can be one of them. It is amazing to me that something that has brought me such being able to carry such a miracle. That it can also be the source of so much pain! Something that I am doing fo rmy recovery is I am going to make a little area that will be my own. With my favorite things, a good book, comfy pillow, that during that crumy time I can have a little area that is mine. I will be praying for your family as you go into this. This surgery is a big thing! It is your body! Right! Mel-
Unread 01-30-2006, 11:54 PM
Can someone please listen to me?

marie i see your from n.y. i was raised in buffalo n.y. but have spent the last 32 years in oregon i love it out here no snow yea but lots of rain good luck on your upcoming surgery it is a life changing experience for us all
Unread 01-31-2006, 12:49 AM
Can someone please listen to me?

Liberty gal,
Thanks for the support. I'm originally from California. I love the snow here but it's been mostly rain this year. Marie 10

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