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I am having 2nd Thoughts......... I am having 2nd Thoughts.........

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  #11  
Unread 03-09-2006, 06:16 AM
I am having 2nd Thoughts.........

Chanale,
You are not alone. It's only natural that you're feeling this way. I've got the jitters too! Whenever I'm feeling like this, I take a deep breath and look back over the past 15 years. No more monthly injections into my stomach, no more internals (is it a prerequisite that all gynae drs have hands like spades?!) no more telling my 4yr old that 'mummy can't play right now, her tummy is bad'. Try to talk to your mum before the surgery. Explain how you're feeling. If she doesn't understand and gets defensive, tell her that this is exactly what you're worried about and ask her to back off...you'll ring her if you need her. Above all, be kind to yourself and cut yourself some slack. It is time to be a little bit selfish...in the long run, everyone will benefit, especially you and yours. Take care.
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  #12  
Unread 03-09-2006, 06:22 AM
I am having 2nd Thoughts.........

Chanale,

I'm 10 days post op, and I know how you feel. I took a bath to relax before my surgery, and just started bawling... I know I needed this done, and I know I wanted it done, however; it brought tears to my eyes. I had my tubes clamped, my kids are 12 and 10, and I wasn't planning on having any more-- I married a man who didn't want any of his own children (too afraid to pass along the diabetic gene) Anyhow, even with all of that in front of me, I had a good cry or two (or three) ha ha... but anyway, you are allowed to let it out, and you are allowed to feel upset. I had a LAVH & BSO so, I lost quite a bit of organs... It's your body, and when something invades your body, or when something in your body fails to provide you healthy living, we are going to be sad and scared!

Keep your chin up, and be happy that soon... very soon, you will be pain free and I promise... You'll feel better soon. I SWEAR to you... the waiting is the worst part. I even cried as I was moving my own body from the bed to the Operating Table... the attending nurse was stroking my hair, as I turned my head and cried. I didn't want my Dr. to see it, so I tried to hold it in and hide... it wasn't long after i felt my first tear run down my cheek and into my ear that they must have knocked me out, because I never remember wiping it away. I woke up in pain of course, but the relief of the whole ordeal was behind me

You just need some hyster sister cheer!! WE all care about you! Take care and God Bless you

Twizz
  #13  
Unread 03-09-2006, 08:01 AM
I am having 2nd Thoughts.........

Chanale,
I know exactly how you're feeling. I just got my date and it is now less than a week away. I am so scared I don't know if I'm coming or going. I am still setting up my support system for my family and myself. I hate the thought of being away from my 3 boys for even a day. I'll be about 2 hours away from home for the surgery so visits will be a bit hard(here comes a little tear or 2 now). Hubby is starting a new job, also so he won't be able to be there for me when I wake up. It is so hard.
Know that you are not alone and that the best wishes of so many people go with you. Just think of all the smiles we'll have when all the tears are finished.
's
Kimberley
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  #14  
Unread 03-09-2006, 08:49 AM
I am having 2nd Thoughts.........

Hi Chanale,I am just 5 weeks post-op I had a TVAH/BSO. I also was very concerned I have an 18month and a 8 month old, and believe me it is hard exspecially if you don't have the help that you need but in the long run you will be so much better off I know i am. Just don't lift them for a few weeks. They really will be fine. I'm living proof my kids are just as healthy now as they were 5 weeks ago and now I am too which will only make it better for them. I really do hope everything goes well for you.Please keep me posted on your recovery and if you need anyone to talk to I'm here.
  #15  
Unread 03-09-2006, 09:24 AM
I am having 2nd Thoughts.........

chanale,

I have been the biggest baby since december! I understand how you feel so much. My dear mother is coming too, and just to make you feel better I will tell you how my time with her will go:

First mom will arrive and be totally oblivious to every concern I have, she will have her own concerns and I will have to make her feel better. Then when I wake up from surgery she will hover over me and cry and I will have to make her feel better. Then she will be really nice and buy me some flowers and magazines and have a nice meal for me when I get home. After that the concern will fade a bit, I will sit in bed and feel rotten and she will be in her pj's the house will be a wreck and I will have to fight myself over just doing it all myself. I will want to get dressed and be a comforting presence to my kids (but I can't because I wll be a princess by then and need to stay in my jammies ) After a few days (or hours)I will lose it because meds and anethesia will give me no self-control. I will yell at her and she will cry and then I will make her feel better. After awhile I will remind myself what I have learned a looooong time age, my mom is my mom, she will not change and I have to let go of unrealistic expectations and just love her for what she is, a little toxic, but otherwise harmless! Then we will have a nice visit and she will go home.

LOL!! I hope that makes you feel better! My kids have been through the ringer this past year and they are fine. Really, we have lost a beloved dog, two babies lost in pregnancy, I have had 3 surgeries (this will be #4) The key is to give them information but not TMI. They will be fine, you can have good cuddles after explaining that mommy's tummy has an owie and you have to be careful not to hurt it. They will love you just the same.

Bless you!
Betts
  #16  
Unread 03-09-2006, 10:15 AM
I am having 2nd Thoughts.........

Chanale,
I know what you're going through, my surgery is the same day and we can really get carried away with our thoughts. I am trusting God, I know I'm in his care and he is in control and I just keep focusing on that. It is really helping me because I am the biggest baby when it comes to anything having to do with a Hospital or Surgery!! I've never had surgery before, and I'm just trying to think positive thoughts. I just went through a divorce and it was final 2 weeks ago, I am buying a house and have to close on that the end of March and I have 2 teens at home. I spent most of last weekend crying off and on and am now doing surprisingly OK! I'm now trying to decide if I want to keep my ovaries or not I'm almost 49 and my DR said I could go either way. If anyone has any suggestions I'd love to hear them. My thoughts and prayers will be with you on the 20th. I'll look forward to hearing how you did as well.
HeLives!
  #17  
Unread 03-09-2006, 10:15 AM
I am having 2nd Thoughts.........

I can understand how you feel as well. My TAH is in 20 days. I have a 6 year old and a 4 year old. I chose to have the surgery while they are in school. This way I can rest during the day. I am scared too. But I keep looking past the surgery date and all the things that will be wonderful without the pain. Come the weel of my surgery I will be a nut case too, but I really am trying to stay positive. Keep your chin up. We are all behind you. Keep checking the boards. They are a wealth of knowledge. Good luck to you.
  #18  
Unread 03-09-2006, 04:50 PM
Just over 2 weeks to go..

I was away today and a call from the hospital was on my answering machine about pre-op testing. It hit me.
I just went through all that for the D&C, hysteroscopy on Jan 31.
I am 63 and I have atypical endometrial hyperplasia on 3 opinions--considered pre-cancerous. It could still be lurking there so I MUST do it. TAH, BSO being done. As a medical professional I know it's the right thing. But guess what? ... I don't feel like having another surgery. I just underwent a mega scoliosis surgery 3 years ago 2 stages(6 hours long), 1 week apart which required a prolonged recovery period. This was very successful but not the same as hysterectomy. So I am really not so afraid of this one because I do not expect the same drawn out recovery as compared to the spine. I am NOT minimizing it but just comparing it to my previous experiences.
As far as the ovaries go-though no guarantee- I hope to minimize chances of ov ca. At my age probably will not notice any change. Correct me if I'm wrong. The vag is probably a different story but what can I do.

Prayers for all my sisters.
  #19  
Unread 03-10-2006, 10:42 PM
I am having 2nd Thoughts.........

Sweetie,
What you are feeling right now is totally understandable and you do not need to justify it to ANYONE! It sounds to me like it is all catching up to you... that is understandable.

The first days after your surgery will go by in a blur and it will be helpful to have a loved one there. Try not to think about what could go wrong and think about what could go right. Try to think about your Mom comforting your children and being there for you. If she doesn't make you feel better you can always go to plan B... the "get Mom out of the house" plan. Shopping, day trips, or Mom go home early plan.

I can tell you that I had my MIL here for my first four days post-op and it was very helpful. I don't have small children and if I did I can imagine I would have been lobbying for her to stay longer. When I am healthy, a four day MIL stay could drive me crazy, but it was SO helpful post-op. Please don't buy trouble Sweetie.

Good luck!
  #20  
Unread 03-10-2006, 11:03 PM
I am having 2nd Thoughts.........

I just skimmed the replies for you posting.. Isn't it amazing to see you are not alone.. I was where you were a few weeks ago.. THe waiting is the hardest.. Keep busy.. (I'm sure you will with a 1 and 2 year old)
Spend time with friends that make you happy and doing things that you like...

The great news is... we're not going anywhere!!!!!!!!!!!!!
AND we've been there so we do know what you are going through and are sending you great big hugs and support!

Crying is okay, it releases seritonin and makes you feel better..
You'll be just fine.. I have two young children and nobody here to help.. I made it through with no complications...

Follow the orders given by the nurses.. Drink lots of water, walk and be glad that this chapter in your life is coming to a close and you are moving on to a new and healthier one..

Sending lots of positive thoughts your way.
Take Care,
carrie
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