Ten days till surgery and NOW I am scared! | HysterSisters
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Ten days till surgery and NOW I am scared! Ten days till surgery and NOW I am scared!

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Unread 06-02-2006, 03:14 PM
Ten days till surgery and NOW I am scared!

I know I cant back out of this because there are no alternatives. Yes, I will be happy to be pain-free, and not have that horrible vistitor each month, but I am so worried about what COULD happen. I know that there are very low chances of stuff happening to my bladder,bowels or other things, but with me "if sonething bad is going to happen it generally does.
I am having a LAVH hopefully, and they have to take the ovary becasue the tube is wrapped around it and makes ovulation a nightmare each month.
I get so dizzy just thinking about it, not to mention that I havent even thought about what life is going to be like going thru surgical menapuase,( Dr will put me on the patch.) But I am still worried, and feel so alone. I dont think my family 3 kids and husband know what I am going to be going thru. I have sent them the wonderful link to this site, but no one has read it yet.
I admire all you who have wonderful people who will take care of you! I was kinda looking forward to the pampering part, but havent found anyone to do that yet.
I have tried praying to help me calm down, breathing, hot showers for my heaadaches and to calm me down, but I think the PMS is also kicking in. Please help...I got lots of great advise for my migraines which worked...but now I need something for my nerves. Do you think it would be ok to ask the dr. for something? I am going to have a Margarita or 2 this weekend for relaxation purposes, but during the week I watch my granddaughter, so I cant do that.
But I am so also scared also that I wont be the same person afterwards. What do I do.
I havent been able to read much becasue of these darn headaches, but like I said I sure would appreciate some advise.
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Unread 06-02-2006, 07:19 PM
Ten days till surgery and NOW I am scared!

How old are your kids? I'm sure they could help out. Have you sat down and talked to your family about this? I have two teenage boys and they are wonderful little mother hens.
The first few days home, you'll need someone to set out food for you that's easy for you to get at-a walk to the kitchen is a good thing-what you need is something on a plate to reheat in the microwave. Or canned soups opened and put in a bowl in the fridge. Have yourself set up wherever the TV is, have your cordless phone with you 24/7 and your bottle of water. That's pretty much what you need the first few days.
You could spend time now preparing meals ahead that DH can reheat when he gets home from work.
Laundry: they bring it to you to sort, they can put it in the machine and run it, put it in the dryer and run it, then bring you the basket to fold. They can put it away.
Some ladies have their church help them out, usually with meals. Might not hurt to ask. It gives people a chance to serve.
Maybe if you explain, without too much detail, how major your surgery will be and give them specifics on how they can help you out, they will probably come through for you.
As for what could happen, nobody can predict that. Rotten luck? Well, if there's a deer on the road, I will hit it. Pretty much every car I've had has "animal tracks" on it. Surgery on the other hand went great. I know its hard not to worry, so I won't say don't worry, but maybe immerse yourself in preparations, do something special for yourself, and time will pass and you'll be a princess before you know it.
Unread 06-03-2006, 03:05 AM
Ten days till surgery and NOW I am scared!

Originally Posted by tlc97
I dont think my family 3 kids and husband know what I am going to be going thru. I have sent them the wonderful link to this site, but no one has read it yet.
I admire all you who have wonderful people who will take care of you! I was kinda looking forward to the pampering part, but havent found anyone to do that yet.
Oh I hear ya loud and clear, because I'm having the same dilemma, granted my kiddies are younger, but my hubby won't even look at the Mister Hyster Sisters site, reckons he knows what to expect, and I know full well he doesn't!!! I am more scared of hurting myself afterwards by having to do too much than anything else, because it's highly likely. I too am insanely jealous of all of you who have wonderful mums and partners who take such good care of you, and hugs to you.
Just try to be nice to yourself where ever possible leading up to your trip to the castle, because no one else will do it for you xxxx
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Unread 06-03-2006, 04:17 AM
Ten days till surgery and NOW I am scared!

If you feel uncomfortable talking to your husband about your need to be taken care of during your recovery, then perhaps you can take your husband to the pre-op appointment and ask your doctor to explain what will be necessary for you to have a successful recovery as well as what to expect post-surgery. Ask him to emphasize that this is major surgery and while you may look OK on the outside, you are still healing on the inside for several weeks following surgery.

I asked my husband for his help in keeping an eye on me to make sure I did not lift anything more than a couple of pounds for the first six weeks, and, due to my bladder sling, nothing over about 10 lbs for 16 weeks. More than once I heard him tell me to stop as I was thoughtlessly beginning to pick-up something I shouldn't. He also soon found he needed to listen to me when I said I needed to rest after a walk turned into a visit to urgent care.

You said they have to take "the ovary because the tube is wrapped around it". Does this mean only one ovary is bad or are both involved? Can they save the other ovary? I decided to keep mine and feel it was a good decision for me. May regret it in the future but for now mine are working and doing their job. I had promised my mom (a BC and OC survivor) I would not take HRT so I was relieved that my ovaries were healthy. Darn if I did, darn if I don't so I decided I couldn't put them back so decided to keep them.

My hysterectomy really helped my disposition. I don't know why. Could be psychological or hormonal. Either way, my husband likes me better. I was really becoming a b****! Couldn't stand myself at times!!

Take care.
Unread 06-03-2006, 04:23 AM
Ten days till surgery and NOW I am scared!

Forget the alcohol. See if an anti-anxiety drug would be in order. Anxiety can be just plain painful!!!!
Unread 06-03-2006, 05:08 AM
Ten days till surgery and NOW I am scared!

*hugs* I hear you on the lack of help, but the sisters here have given me some excellent ideas to make that easier. Like pre- preparing meals.
I was having bad anxiety attacks about my surgery and spoke to my doctor, she prescribed xanax for me to take untill surgery. Its a low dose so I can still function but it definately took the edge off my nerves. Talk to your doctor, surely he/she can give you something.
I hope you feel better soon.
Unread 06-03-2006, 11:22 AM
Ten days till surgery and NOW I am scared!

Ok you have gotten some great advise that I wont repeat. There are many mild anti-anxiety meds that wont interfer with the caring of your granddaughter. Now, my DH was not the most understanding - he is very matter of fact, doesnt have "time" for emotional issues so to speak. Let me tell you, the 2 days before and the first 2 weeks he was great. After that, well I was more on more own. But I did fine (TAH - took everything). Yes, it took me a while to get the laundry under control, but as I was working with that, I made DH & DS help. It is normal to be this concerned, nervous & scared. Men dont understand things like periods, ovaries, uteruses. They dont have the same equipment and from my experience they are too embarrassed to ask about those things. Keep your chin up!

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