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Kids are getting the best of me! Kids are getting the best of me!

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  #1  
Unread 06-08-2006, 04:25 PM
kids

Hi everyone I'm post op 8 months and have a 17,4, and 3 yr old and I'm going nuts! I let everything go (potty training)etc. because of the pain since the birth of my son, and then the big hysterectomy! I'm depressed and my kids are getting the best of me and its not enough! Any suggestions?
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  #2  
Unread 06-08-2006, 06:17 PM
Kids are getting the best of me!

Is Their father around? cause you could always kick him in the butt and say help me ****it!
  #3  
Unread 06-08-2006, 06:50 PM
Kids are getting the best of me!

Firm, fair, and consistent. If the children show all the physical signs of being able to control their bodily functions, then it is time!!!! (It's like when the doc said you were fully dialated and said-- "it's time, let's push!") Wonderful happiness will come from a reduced to non-existent diaper bill. And just like that time when the doc said push, you knew the baby was coming out no matter what. It needs to be the same attitude with the potty-training-- it needs to happen no matter what.

Just remember that you are the adult no matter what. Things need to go your way. The 17 year-old should help out in the process (as can the four year old on some things) to help get the three year old potty trained. If they both need it (3 and 4,) then a week of making them sit on the their respective potties on a schedule is in order.

Lots of whining, crying, and what have you will take place. You need to set your psyche like you are about to run a marathon, he-man competition and the Olympics. You can do this. It starts with the statement, "From this point forward...this is how it will be." Firmly, fairly and consistently.

If the dad(s) are not in the picture, I find it almost easier to do this singly because they know if they need anything, they have to come to you. If they want anything, they have to come to you. You are their sole source of everything, and you are their world. Anybody else in the picture-- grandparents, neighbors, aunts, whomever-- needs to be on board with you to make this happen.

Potty training and getting the house generally back in order takes some pre-planning, but once you have prepared yourself, family, and supporters, you should be able to make that plan come to life.

You might shed tears a few times at the frustration, but just remember that your children got your stubborness in part from the mistress-- you. You can do this!!!! Just have the vision of exactly how you want things to be firmly in your mind and keep repeating-- "if it is to be it is up to me!!"

Set-backs? Again, pre-plan for them. Go to another room if need be, count to ten before addressing the problem. Figure out exactly how you are going to deal with things-- and think it through. How do you want to best address if one decides to pull their diaper off in front of the tv and put a twirly there instead of in the potty (this actually happened with my DS when my DH was home?) How do you want to address wiping? Hand washing?

Some places offer potty charts where kids get stickers for successful potty attempts. Maybe that can help.

Good luck and best wishes in getting you house back in order!
Happy healing!
Barb
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  #4  
Unread 06-08-2006, 07:06 PM
Kids are getting the best of me!

Hi,

I am sorry things are not going well for you. It is tough trying to heal and run a household with kids.

If you are depressed and your emotions are not what you would like them to be then please see your dr. Your hormones may be out of balance and the dr will be able to help you.

I hope you feel better soon.

s
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