sounds minor when i look at some of these threads, | HysterSisters
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sounds minor when i look at some of these threads, sounds minor when i look at some of these threads,

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  #1  
Unread 09-12-2006, 11:52 PM
sounds minor when i look at some of these threads,

but i'm feeling so alone because i had a big blow out with my best friend today, and i think i may now have only one good local friend to count on. friend dumped me because i'm 'too negative'. dump her while she's down!
in addition to the hysterectomy (Nov.), I'm also having lots of problems with my job. I'm not sure, but I will prob. need to start looking for a new job as soon as my recovery allows. So- hysterectomy stress, gotta keep the job long enough to recover, lost friends, family 200 miles away, no love life, yada yada.
can't even fathom having a DH.
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  #2  
Unread 09-13-2006, 06:24 AM
sounds minor when i look at some of these threads,

Dear Dallas,

Your situation is not minor. Your friend seems to lack compassion at precisely the time when you need compassion and friendship. It could be that your friend is upset about what you are facing and can't really manage to bring her/himself to talk about it any longer with you. The uncertainty of our conditions drives *us* crazy, but imagine what it does to our friends (and dh's) -- friends and dh's tend to want to fix things for us, or to help us fix them. But our situation is something they can't fix, so, out of helplessness, they can turn on us and make us feel small. Sometimes they project on us the feeling they are having about themselves. I'm sorry you feel you've lost your friend, but maybe things will reach a better place after a little time of healing can occur. In the meantime, I wanted to suggest that there are many women on the site who are alone, and many of them have had good suggestions about preparing for this surgery. There was a thread started by someone named "Lacynia," so if you go look her up, you'll be able to trace the thread she started. And someone named "gracefull1" has been posting recently about her surgery. Your remaining close friend will be a good help to you if you need help with laundry and re-stocking your refrigerator. And in the meantime, there are lots of things you can do to help yourself out.

I hope you are finding yourself in a happier place this morning, and I hope your friend realizes, now or eventually, that compassion is a better road than criticism.
  #3  
Unread 09-13-2006, 11:09 AM
sounds minor when i look at some of these threads,



I am sorry you are having these problems. I can understand the hurt and frustration this is causing you. I know this surgery is not easy on us emotionally and physically, and it is especially hard if friends and family are not there for us.

Please know you are among friends, and you can vent here all you want, we will listen.

I hope things will get better for you, as change sometimes is a blessing in disguise.

I am sending you lot's of s

Sue
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  #4  
Unread 09-13-2006, 08:03 PM
sounds minor when i look at some of these threads,

thanks y'all. i think my friend is definitely a "fixer" and gets frustrated with me when there are some things that can't be FIXED- they need to be accepted or adjusted to or mourned or whatever, but I can't paint a smiley face on top of it all just to make other people more comfortable.

this message board looks great so far!
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