Letters to family

my surgery isn't until July 17th TAH and I'm trying to get everything I want to get done, done. But yesterday I read in the paper where a woman died in childbirth (long story) and I started to think what if I die. I trust My Dr. totally..but. It could happen So i decided to write some letters to my Hubby and 22 yr old daughter. Is this strange?

I don't think it's strange at all. I think a lot of people do this. I haven't as of yet, but I might. We have two daughters adopted from China. When we flew over to bring home the youngest, the oldest stayed behind. I was so emotional I couldn't bring myself to, but my dh wrote a letter to our older daughter just in case something happened. It made both of us feel better.

Gigimay

	Quote:
Originally Posted by honda2006 my surgery isn't until July 17th TAH and I'm trying to get everything I want to get done, done. But yesterday I read in the paper where a woman died in childbirth (long story) and I started to think what if I die. I trust My Dr. totally..but. It could happen So i decided to write some letters to my Hubby and 22 yr old daughter. Is this strange?

I don't think its strange at all. I know I have my own fears especially after the pre op visit when the doctor was telling me what could happen. It does tend to make some question their own morality. I think if you feel the need to write to your family and even friends then you should.
Just know that I will be praying that your hubby and daughter won't have to read those letters without you there with them.

This is so weird to see your question. I just today sent cards to my sisters and my dad telling them how much I love them. Maybe because I am worried about the surgery but also just because I wanted them to know. I don't think I will write to my kids even though they are grown too. I think that would flip them out. And besides they already know they have my heart. Good luck with your surgery. I go to the castle in 2 weeks I'll let you know about all of the mystery.

I fully expected everything to go well, and it did. However, I asked the minister and one person from my church to keep in touch with my mom if something happened. Also, in surgery prep, mom was there with me. Now - my sister died at age 48 last year of MS...I am sure that was at the back of her mind, would she lose another?

I didn't say much, just, "Mom, I am sure everything is going to be ok. But if something happens, don't get mad at God. And I told Greg and Elizabeth to keep an eye out for you."

She was in tears as she promised to not get mad at God, and I had tears in my eyes too.

So no, I don't think the letter is a silly idea at all. At its very best, it will strengthen the bonds between you and those you write to.

Arly3 I glad you had your mom, I loss mind 3 years ago to lung cancer but we talked alot about her hysterectomy at the age of 31... I have alot of support but there's no one like your momma. I wasn't going to mail them just tell my best friend where they are at in case.

honda,

I don't think it's odd at all... think about it like this... many know that our military Soldiers often carry "letters to home" with them while they are deployed... why do they do this, because they know something may happen... not something will, but they know it's a possibility. You are doing/thinking the same... we know in our hearts that it's a slim possibility... but it often makes us feel better also knowing in our hearts that our feelings have and can be expressed through a personal letter.

I have written letter to my DH before... that he's never seen... I file them away and tell him if anything ever happens to me to read them.... and I've done this during an average, boring, normal day. It has always made me feel good. It's kinda the same as writing in a journal.

Honda- I am going to write letters to my family members. It is on agenda for this weekend. I believe my surgery will be successfull. However I would like to write my thoughts to my family!

I was already planning on writing letter to mine also. Not so much in case something was to happen but more as to why mommy was doing this and how happy we would be after it was over. I don't know.. pen hasn't touched paper on it so not sure how they will end up going. I do good with writing things down. I can say things much better that way.

Writing letters to loved ones is not strange at all. When faced with major surgery, of course our minds are going to go to all fears and possiblities, no matter how unlikely they are. This is a scary time.

I've said on here before, if you feel the need to write letters, I think you should. It gives you a sense of control over the situation, and we all know how little control we feel once we hand ourselves over to the medical community to take care of our health. Our only job then is to heal and maintain our pain.

I had 3 surgeries in two months earlier this year, and I wrote a letter in the middle of all that to my daughter and just left it on my laptop. I also took care of my Living Will. I thank heavens I didn't need either one of those documents ... and honestly when I was writing them, I didn't expect to need them ... but in keeping with the spirit of superwomen everywhere, I thought of it as one more loose end that I needed to square away before I was "laid up" for a while. And yes I was out of commission for a bit, but not as long as I thought I'd be.

I'd suggest you get your priority things done and then seriously focus on YOU and your recovery and your health. Life is going to be here when you feel better. So slow down now, and take the time to get healthy and strong. We'll be here when you need us.

Good luck!