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How much help needed after TVH How much help needed after TVH

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Unread 07-30-2007, 07:59 PM
How much help needed after TVH


I am 36 years old and having a TVH on August 13th. How much help will I really need at home? I have a 18 month old and 10 year old. The 10 year old is not really strong enough to lift the 18 month old (oiver 25 pounds). I know I can't do it while recovering, but didn't know how long it would be before I could lift him. My hubby will have the day of and 2 days after my surgery off, but then must return to work. My parents can help some, but they are taking care of my Grandfather right now. They are really the only family around and my friends all live out of town.

Should I try to hire some kind of home care? Any suggestions?

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Unread 07-30-2007, 08:10 PM
How much help needed after TVH

I'm almost five weeks out, and you will need help with the 18 month old. NO HEAVY LIFTING, ask you Dr. for sure, the weight restrictions, but I haven't lifted anything over 10 pounds yet, until I get Dr. ok. I don't want to mess anything up. Home care for a while sounds like a good idea to me. My mom and sister have been coming in to help me, sweep, laundry, change beds, scrub floors, the heavy housework. DH is pretty useless when it comes to stuff like that. Ask you Dr. what you restrictions will be and for how long. I wasn't aloud to drive for 3 weeks. Every Dr. is different, but this might give you a rough estimate.
Unread 07-30-2007, 08:13 PM
How much help needed after TVH

Hello. I can't imagine what it would be like to have an 18 month old on my hands only three days after surgery. The 10 year old might be able to help with playing, but how to handle changing diapers or heading to potty -- that would be beyond me to think about, only three days out from surgery, even when it's a VH. I tore my vaginal stitches within the first two weeks of surgery and was ordered to total bedrest for three weeks. Is there no one within your vicinity with whom you might offer to do some time-sharing with the kids -- having them take your children for two weeks, day-play, and you take theirs for the same amount of time once you are feeling better? Sometimes the hospital human resources staff might have suggestions, too. In any case, I hope you will try to find some assistance. I understand your parents are feeling the pressures of dealing with an aging parent. But if you are to be well for your family, you need to have some help at least during the first week. A gallon of milk or water weighs about 7 lbs, my doc told me. And I was not supposed to lift more than 5 for my first 2 weeks.

I wish you the very best in your surgery and recovery.
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Unread 07-31-2007, 04:43 AM
How much help needed after TVH

Thanks for your replies.

As for my parents, they will help some, but my grandfather is in Stage 3 bladder cancer and has many doctor appointments that my parents drive him to. My mom is almost blind, so she can't drive. They will help me as much as possible, but they can't be here every day that my husband is at work.

It is very hard for me to ask for help from others as I am a very independent person, but it sounds like I will need to suck it up for a few weeks. Looks like I may have to check into hiring some kind of home care, if I can find one that will help with the baby.

Just one more thing to add to my stress level. *sigh*
Unread 07-31-2007, 05:01 AM
How much help needed after TVH

I agree with the other sisters, you should have some extra help. Being an independent person can be frustrating when you need extra help (been there, done that, but, would never pass on the T-shirt, I burned it), but, you will be glad of it in the long run.
I'm not sure what you have available in your area, but, when my kidlets were younger and I needed the extra help, I had home care and some very very caring volunteers from the health unit as well as the health unit nurses. The hospital had passed on the information to my husband but, he didn't think we would need it and couldn't remember the information - so, they may have some suggestions that you may not of thought of before.
Also, the home care I had would help with not only the kids, but, would help with the laundry, house cleaning, and feed the kids and myself breakfast and dinner until my hubby could get home.
Good luck with your surgery and we will be thinking of you and your family
~Big Hugs~Donna
Unread 07-31-2007, 07:35 AM
How much help needed after TVH

Hi Mel
I read in your post that you may have to "hire" home care... if that means that you're not covered for this service and have to pay... than perhaps hiring a young student from the student centre would be cheaper. I just had my TVH on the 9th of July...along with other repairs and bladder surgery... but I have to agree with the other sisters. I really don't think you'll be up to caring for your baby by yourself. You really should avoid, bending, twisting, reaching, lifting....all movements you would use in playing and caring for the baby. It's stressful not having family/friends nearby....I was in the same boat! Thank God, my boys are a little older and have been able to take on a lot of extra responsibilities. If money is an issue, which it is for many of us.... maybe contacting the local church...they often have volunteers.. that are willing to help! Hope it all goes well...need to eliminate THIS stress so you can concentrate on staying positive for surgery. Good Luck ooo

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