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I swear if one more person..... I swear if one more person.....

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Unread 11-02-2007, 12:55 PM
I swear if one more person.....

I was in the recovery room, JUST waking up from the anethesia. I hear nurses bustling about me, because appearantly my IV was leaking all over my bed, and me, so as I am being stripped from my sopping wet gown, exposed from the waist up, to God only knows how many nurses and other meidcal staff, a male nurse has the nerve to ask me why I was having a hyst at such a young age...

WHAT THE....?!?!?!

Oh, and then there was the nurse a couple of years ago, aligning me for my x-ray who felt the need to tell me "it's a shame too, you have the perfect hips for giving birth". Nice.
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Unread 11-02-2007, 12:58 PM
I swear if one more person.....

There are SO many things I would have suggested you replied with but I dont want anyone eyes to burn from the language
Unread 11-02-2007, 01:32 PM
I swear if one more person.....

I forgot about that statement! "You are awful young to be having this done," You know what? Your breath is awful bad for you to be talking to me! Your feet are awful big for you to be walking without falling on your face! And, when people find out I am having this done, they want to know why. At first, I just told people that I have painful periods....trying not to get into the details. Now, when someone asks me, I tell them that my uterus is about to fall out of me and that makes it kind of hard to have a good time with my husband! Maybe I will read off a list of problems and symptoms that I am having and waste their time like they are wasting mine! It doesn't bother me for the people who are close to me asking these things, but there are some people who seem disgusted that I am doing this. BLAH BLAH BLAH....give me another Miller Lite and leave me alone. ha ha ha
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Unread 11-02-2007, 01:42 PM
I swear if one more person.....

I know we all sound like a bunch of angry hags right now, but let me tell you. Reading all of your posts is one of the first times I've really smiled all week! And laughed.

Unread 11-02-2007, 04:21 PM

We just have to come up with some REALLY excellent comebacks! Comments that are adorably "quaint and cute" but will leave the recipient with that tiny little creepy feeling that they've just been told,"You're a MORON! and shut up you!!!"

I'll see what I can come up with... tpierce75, you are so right... Your comments would be something I would say... I know you wanted to but... I WOULD!!! You just "wanted" to say them and didn't but ooooohhhhh baby.....

Here's the latest assinine comment, just this morning.... "well ya don't need a uterus anyway, you have grandkids..." WHAT is that????

It came from the guy that turns in his web orders for me to process.... I said.... "Well you don't need all that Halloween candy you've scarfed up from all our candy dishes either but..."

Gag!!! Some people are just:
'a sandwich short of a picnic...'
'a french fry short of a happy meal'
'a brick short of a full load'
'a man short of a full load'
a crayon short of a 64 count box'

...well you get the idea!
Unread 11-02-2007, 04:45 PM
I swear if one more person.....

hmmmmm comebacks....thinking hard now....this could get evil

comeback to "wow your lucky you dont have a period" will now be "that's true but I do still have an exclamation mark so [email protected]$% off!" or take it to a cute level and say "don't worry sweetie you too could be lucky, one day they may find a cure for that nasty rash your sporting on your forehead" ok Im sorry can't do it without being mean lol

comeback to "Why did you only have one child" will now be (while clutching my fists to my heart "the voices told me to stop procreating cause this one is THE ONE" and then ask if they will babysit

comeback for if I still pee properly will now be "no it spurts out my ears" then will turn my head and say "I gotta go realllllll bad"

comeback for the nurses that ask me when my last period was will now be "the last sentence I wrote and since we are sharing....when was yours?"

My doctor is really cool and I may just ask if he will take photos of the next procedure I am having and then I will keep them in my wallet and bring them out when people start talking about why I "chose" do this and then I will say I have always felt a connection to my ovaries and reallly wanted a keepsake.......ok I am getting really bad now....you girls have made me laugh and feel normal again, thanks a bunch all of you!
Unread 11-02-2007, 04:53 PM
I swear if one more person.....

Oh Carriana...I just read the part about the nurse and hips thing....what a insensitive *****....give me the name of the hospital...I dont care I am in Canada I will go over there and smack her nose while firmly stating "bad puppy!"
Unread 11-02-2007, 04:54 PM
I swear if one more person.....

Too Funny!!!! My husband keeps joking about me having my hyster...that is his way of dealing with it. We are not overly serious people, and we pick on each other a lot. Last night, my ear was aching a little. I haven't been sleeping well either, so I decided to take some Tylenol PM to help me sleep. He asked what was wrong and I told him about my ear. He said that it was probably my uterus causing the problem...he said my uterus is pulling on my lower back muscles which are attached to my tailbone which is attached to my spine which is attached to my neck which is attached to my ear. I look at him like, "what the $&^ are you talking about?" He said ultimately, all my problems come from my uterus and we need to get rid of the darn thing! I laughed. I am laughing now. He is an idiot! My consult is tomorrow! I will find out exactly when I will have my hyster. I am sooo nervous! But excited. You guys are great!
Unread 11-02-2007, 05:01 PM
I swear if one more person.....

ROFL this sister is totally lovin your husband right now!!!! I know it has been seven years since my first surgery and even though I survived it I am nervous about this one as well....

The greatest tips I can give you is

1) you will be freezing when you wake, beg for blankets before hand
2) walking really helps with the gas
3) you will have the most amazing feeling of relief when (if) the staples are removed (the worse part if before that)
4) Get a body pillow, it truly helped alot especially if you sleep on your side
5) Rent one of those hospital trays
6) I know this one is hard but you will have much less pain if your hubby does not sleep in the same bed with you until your staples come out

hope this helps
Unread 11-02-2007, 05:31 PM
I swear if one more person.....


The funny part is, at the time, I didn't so much even think about her comment or react to it. But then later, as I replayed it in my head, I had a total "What the ****?!" moment.

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