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Unread 12-17-2007, 02:55 PM
new UK sister!

Hi All
I am facing a hysterectomy in two weeks (on new year's eve) with removal of my ovaries which are both enlarged with 7cm cysts and because there is a 1:5 chance of ovarian cancer (high blood test result for CA125)

I am expecting this operation to affect me physically but not sure about the mental reaction. At 50 and with two grown up daughters, I am past my child bearing years, so there is no grieving about that, but I still feel young, fit and sexy and am scared about the menopause. Many women I see in England who are my age look as if they have lost all interest in themselves, their appearance and their sexuality. Is that what will happen to me after I lose my ovaries? Will I become a sexless frump? Oh help!
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Unread 12-17-2007, 04:22 PM
new UK sister!

You absolutely will not be a sexless frump. It is all in your own attitude. Your body will change to some extent but I am also early 50s. My waist has thickened some but I am not exercising either as I have been in active chemo for two years. The hot flashes were worse for the first year, which I controlled with either soy pills or black cohash. Now I am only using vitamin E for the hot flashes. Those are the changes I can directly attach to a hysterectomy. There may be some others that are hidden in the chemo reactions I am having, so some other ladies can share their experiences as well.

I do hope this is not cancer for you. Are you seeing a gynie/onc. I don't know how your system works in UK. There are some other UK sisters who can help out specifically in that way as well.

Feel free to come by and vent or ask questions. These ladies here are remarkable.
Unread 12-17-2007, 04:22 PM
new UK sister!

Good lord - I hope not! I am STILL sexy, even bald, and menopausal at 40!
My sex drive is still present too. Chemo does alter that a bit during my sick days, but in betweeen, I'm fine and ready to go!
I believe that it is definitely a mental state that keeps us young and sexy. A positive mental attitude is all it takes!
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Unread 12-17-2007, 06:40 PM
new UK sister!

dear speedyvet 1...good luck with your hysterectomy and i hope it turns out to NOT be cancer. make sure you give yourself a chance for a full recovery before getting back to your normal routine...don't overdo it...and get help with household chores for awhile. i'm 57, and after everything i've been thru since feb. 07, i'm feeling great. i think my fitness level is higher than it was before my dx, since i've been working out with a personal trainer. i also take yoga and dance yoga and i want to get back to my salsa/fit class when i have more time. (my personal training is twice a week, i want to change it to once a week so i can do more fun things, such as salsa/fit).

if you have to have chemo, then don't expect to be as sexual as you are right now (after treatments), as you might have side effects and fatigue, although everyone is different and maybe that aspect of your life will remain. if you do have treatments, once they are finished, i'm sure you'll be back to your normal self. you can still keep up your appearance once you feel better. 2 wks after my surgery, i went to the hairdressers and kept a pillow over my tummy and a "sick" basin in my bag just in case...i certainly wasn't going to look sick in public if i could help it.

i don't think that you're the type to let yourself go, so keep up your good attitude. the 2 biggest problems i've had with menopause are: (1) hot flashes...i just put up with them, used to take an icepack to bed with and (2) vaginal can ask your dr. for advice with that.

i wish you all the best for a successful surgery and a good outcome. please let us know how you are doing. happy holidays...too bad new year's eve will be a bit of a write-off...and have a happy new year.
Unread 12-17-2007, 08:51 PM
new UK sister!

Another post 50 sister here. No, having a hyster does not mean you will be sexless and frumpy. If you are one who takes care of yourself, likes to look good and be sexual, then that will continue after a hyster. It is up to you on that. These things are more mental.
Unread 12-17-2007, 09:35 PM
new UK sister!

First, here's hoping that things turn out not to be cancer! Either way, you've found a truly wonderful site chock full of sincere support and valuable information.

As for that sexy/frumpy concern, don't even worry about that. I was a ripe old 37 when I had surgery, and my DH says I'm still just as desirable, etc., as before -- maybe even more so after all we've been through together.

As someone else mentioned, a little attitude goes a long way. Heck, my mom looks FAB, and she's a rockin' 71 year old! So, don't let that aspect of things concern you too much. You sound like a FAB lady going into this, and you're going to come out even more FAB on the other side!

Unread 12-18-2007, 03:56 AM
new UK sister!

Hi speedyvet and welcome
I am 48 and had my hysterectomy almost 4 months ago. I admit I was worried about loss of sex drive etc but it has made absolutely no difference at all - I must admit for a few weeks after surgery I did not feel sexy but I can now say I am back to normal (whatever that is!)
I agree with other posters that sexiness is all in the mind and attitude so think young and sexy and you will be !!
Good luck!
x x x
Unread 12-21-2007, 10:56 AM
new UK sister!

Thank you all for you lovely messages of encouragement. Now I am feeling a bit better about it. Had my last day at work today and everyone has been so kind. I have been told not to come back until I am properly ready and then to do so gradually if necessary.

The hardest thing for me is going to be the resting and being sensible but I have family here who will keep me in check so should be alright! I just bought some big wide waisted jogging pants to wear post-op, which I will ceremonially burn after I dont need them any more! Then I will go out and get a new spring wardrobe!

Unread 12-21-2007, 03:53 PM
new UK sister!

Hey Chris,

You may just discover that you love those jogging pants after all! <G>

glad to hear things are looking better for you. You will be on the road to recovery in no time!

Unread 12-24-2007, 11:02 AM
new UK sister!

I hope your surgery is "unremarkable"-that is the wording they use when all is normal.

I will admit my surgery changed my sex life A TON. I went on a estrogen vag pill. And I was MUCH MUCH better. I am only 40 and my parts shriveled up to a husk. But the estrogen brought things back to life. So if things don't "feel" normal talk with your DR. I am glad I spoke up, it would be tough to never enjoy that intimacy again. My DH was VERY happy too:}

Heres is to a boring surgery and path report.

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