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Boy, DH sure did put me in a mood... Boy, DH sure did put me in a mood...

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  #1  
Unread 12-21-2007, 12:06 AM
Boy, DH sure did put me in a mood...

Just what a girl needs post-op:

He gave me a birthday card that says...

"You're not getting older, you're getting more interesting to the medical profession."

And inside, he wished me happy birthday and a speedy recovery... and just signed his name.

He thought the card was really funny. Maybe I'm being a stick in the mood, but I didn't need the extra reminder that I'm having health issues.

I'm already weirdly hormonal... this is the last thing I needed... I don't even feel like having a birthday this year. Maybe it's post-op blues rearing it's head temporarily?

(And the card wasn't even attached to a present!)
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  #2  
Unread 12-21-2007, 01:02 AM
Boy, DH sure did put me in a mood...

I think I would respond my making an appointment slip for him that says "you are scheduled for a complete penis and testicle removal procedure on (insert his birthday here)" and then inform him (on the slip) that "due to your advanced age donation of the above mentioned tissue is not possible because at this age they are useless anyway"

(hoping to make you smile)

Happy birthday
Angela
aka Pamir
  #3  
Unread 12-21-2007, 05:28 AM
Boy, DH sure did put me in a mood...

Pamir,
You are brutal. But HILARIOUS!!!

Tam,
So very sorry DH is being a butt, again. Although you have to admit I don't think even then medical profession has came even close to figuring us (women)out yet. If they had they would find some way for recovery to not make us vegatating, emotional wrecks.
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  #4  
Unread 12-21-2007, 06:25 AM
Boy, DH sure did put me in a mood...

I don't know your DH but I personally wouldn't take this as an insult but rather has an attempt to make me laugh if my DH gave me this card. Remember, it's not the act, it's the motive behind it that is important. If he was trying to make you feel better (even though it actually made you feel worse!), then his heart was in the right place. Good luck...hope you are feeling better soon.
  #5  
Unread 12-21-2007, 07:56 AM
Boy, DH sure did put me in a mood...

  Quote:
Originally Posted by pamir
I think I would respond my making an appointment slip for him that says "you are scheduled for a complete penis and testicle removal procedure on (insert his birthday here)" and then inform him (on the slip) that "due to your advanced age donation of the above mentioned tissue is not possible because at this age they are useless anyway"

(hoping to make you smile)

Happy birthday
Angela
aka Pamir
OMG, Angela... like Jessica said, brutal.... but hilarious!!! Thanks, that did make me smile.

  Quote:
Originally Posted by jesi7
Pamir,
You are brutal. But HILARIOUS!!!

Tam,
So very sorry DH is being a butt, again. Although you have to admit I don't think even then medical profession has came even close to figuring us (women)out yet. If they had they would find some way for recovery to not make us vegatating, emotional wrecks.
Ain't that the truth! I already had been a little down because of the time of year and not being able to get out and do much, and I was already thinking "yeah, another year older and I'm falling apart!" I really needed his reminder, too!

  Quote:
Originally Posted by sunny0323
I don't know your DH but I personally wouldn't take this as an insult but rather has an attempt to make me laugh if my DH gave me this card. Remember, it's not the act, it's the motive behind it that is important. If he was trying to make you feel better (even though it actually made you feel worse!), then his heart was in the right place. Good luck...hope you are feeling better soon.
Thank you, Sunny. I think a lot of times, my DH thinks about the laugh he gets out of things without really going beyond how the other person is going to react. But what puzzled me all the more was how he signed the card - no "love" and the "hope you have a speedy recovery" seemed very, I don't know, generic. But at least he thought to get a card.
  #6  
Unread 12-21-2007, 10:29 AM
Boy, DH sure did put me in a mood...

Mens brains work differently than ours. HE thought it was funny, and assumed you would too.

I loved Pamir's response, might give him pause, but then again, might not....

Being direct might help, since that is how men think. Tell him that the card WAS funny, and probably true, but it hurt your feelings because you ACTUALLY FEEL ___________________. And that he could make you feel better if he _________________________.

He might not live up to it, but then again, he just might !!!!!
  #7  
Unread 12-21-2007, 11:33 AM
Boy, DH sure did put me in a mood...

Men think things are funny that horrify us. My husband does that, but he would never intentionally hurt my feelings for all the world. It's just that sometimes that Y chromosome gets in the way and puts a roadblock between common sense and his card/gift giving skills. Nasty little thing sometimes, that chromosome.
  #8  
Unread 12-21-2007, 08:31 PM
Boy, DH sure did put me in a mood...

Ok, I thought the card would have been funny at a different time. At this point after an emotional time, I think he hadn't thought it through. I read your post to my hubby and he said he doesn't think your DH was trying to make you feel bad. But you should tell him how it made you feel, instead of getting mad at him. He also said, "we are men, we don't know"!

Good luck!
  #9  
Unread 12-21-2007, 09:39 PM
Boy, DH sure did put me in a mood...

Men think differently from us because their plumbing is on the outside. I guess that is enough of a handicap in itself.
  #10  
Unread 12-22-2007, 09:49 AM
Boy, DH sure did put me in a mood...

  Quote:
Originally Posted by scootery
Mens brains work differently than ours. HE thought it was funny, and assumed you would too.

I loved Pamir's response, might give him pause, but then again, might not....

Being direct might help, since that is how men think. Tell him that the card WAS funny, and probably true, but it hurt your feelings because you ACTUALLY FEEL ___________________. And that he could make you feel better if he _________________________.

He might not live up to it, but then again, he just might !!!!!
Thanks... I did try having a direct conversation with him. I told him that I can see amusement in the card, it is a funny card, but that it did hurt my feelings a bit because of the emotions that I'm running through post-op. Unfortunately, he just laughed it off and thought I was being silly, said I have no sense of humor.

  Quote:
Originally Posted by CelticTigress
Men think things are funny that horrify us. My husband does that, but he would never intentionally hurt my feelings for all the world. It's just that sometimes that Y chromosome gets in the way and puts a roadblock between common sense and his card/gift giving skills. Nasty little thing sometimes, that chromosome.
I know what you mean about men's humor. I just wish that he wouldn't pronounce me as having NO sense of humor just because my humor is different from his. And I wish he wouldn't have just dismissed my feelings.

  Quote:
Originally Posted by blooming Rose
Ok, I thought the card would have been funny at a different time. At this point after an emotional time, I think he hadn't thought it through. I read your post to my hubby and he said he doesn't think your DH was trying to make you feel bad. But you should tell him how it made you feel, instead of getting mad at him. He also said, "we are men, we don't know"!

Good luck!
Thanks for running it by your DH, for his perspective. I'm not really mad at my DH about it, it just disappointed me and made me feel a little bad. I know DH wasn't intentionally trying to hurt me, it's just that he didn't really think about the card, other than the fact that it was funny to him. On your birthday, especially when you're still post-op and have the daily reminder, you don't need any additional reminders that you have medical issues and that they're, somehow, funny.

But as I said above, I did tell him how I felt... and was told that I was being silly and that I have no sense of humor.

  Quote:
Originally Posted by lady4carousels
Men think differently from us because their plumbing is on the outside. I guess that is enough of a handicap in itself.
Oh boy, ain't that the truth!
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