OW!!! I thought the first time wouldn't hurt!!! | HysterSisters
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OW!!! I thought the first time wouldn't hurt!!! OW!!! I thought the first time wouldn't hurt!!!

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  #1  
Unread 01-06-2008, 08:41 AM
OW!!! I thought the first time wouldn't hurt!!!

okay, so last nite after getting the ok from Dr. to have sex my hubby and I attempted. things were great until he first penetrated (sorry for TMI) and it hurt sooooooooo bad we couldn't go thru with it. what the ???? I thought this was supposed to get better now that I've had a TAH. Please tell me that it gets better, please!! I've been having pain with intercourse for 2 years and thought I'd left that all behind. I'm so discouraged and my poor husband! he's very sweet and supportive but we're both disappointed and confused. Any suggestions???
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  #2  
Unread 01-06-2008, 08:48 AM
OW!!! I thought the first time wouldn't hurt!!!

i'm at 11 weeks post op and although alot of the pain is gone that i used to experience is gone. and thats great.. i know what you are talking about. still at 11 weeks, when he has deep penatration, its still hurts me and i have to stop. i dont know if its still just healing or what, but i hope it goes aways soon.
  #3  
Unread 01-06-2008, 10:43 AM
OW!!! I thought the first time wouldn't hurt!!!

I don't know if either of you kept your ovaries, but if you didn't vaginal atrophy may be the culprit here--lack of estrogen causes thinning of the vaginal walls and can reduce their flexibility as well..... that's why intercourse wasn't comfortable for me the first time after surgery either. I immediately got some Estrace vaginal cream prescribed by my gyno, and within a very short time everything was back to normal (until I forgot to use it for a while recently-will never do that again!) However, whether or not you have your ovaries, it probably wouldn't hurt to always have artificial lubrication (such as Astroglide) on hand--our bodies are still healing and it may be quite a while longer before everything's back to "normal".
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  #4  
Unread 01-06-2008, 11:30 AM
OW!!! I thought the first time wouldn't hurt!!!

I know exactly where you are coming from its the same for me. I am going to start using the cream and see if that helps me.
  #5  
Unread 01-06-2008, 03:20 PM
OW!!! I thought the first time wouldn't hurt!!!

I'm with you all. I had LAVH, bso, a/p repairs on 11/14. Was given the ok 12/28. It was a terrible experience for both of us. We have done it a few times since, and it gets better each time. I think today was about the 5th time, and it was much better for me this time. Don't know if this will work for any of you, and if it's tmi, but here goes. I had read that I should be on top to "control" the penetration. But that was terrible!! It was much better when I was on bottom and he was upright (on his knees on the bed or standing beside the bed)....SORRY...I know that's lots of info....but I also know how desperate I was for it to be better!! My dr. said it would get better over time, and it has. Still a way to go, but we're getting there!
  #6  
Unread 01-06-2008, 11:49 PM
OW!!! I thought the first time wouldn't hurt!!!

Hello Ladies:

You know, you'all say it's too much information, but I am so thankful that you DID list TMI. I thought I was the only one having problems out there being intimate. I'm almost 9 weeks post op and I still have pain. Being on top is fine and dandy, but the pressure on my incision is killing me. Rolling on the bed to get into position is also a chore and totally ruins the moment. I don't know where else to turn other than here because this is sort of embarrassing to discuss with my doctor.

Thank you everyone for posting and being sincere. It has helped me so much to know I'm not alone.
  #7  
Unread 01-07-2008, 05:24 AM
OW!!! I thought the first time wouldn't hurt!!!

I had the same problem the first time my husband and I were intimate after my TAH. Things were going great until the moment he attempted to penetrate, then OWWW! I almost couldn't finish, but we very patiently kept working and several minutes later we were fine. I think what happened is that as aroused mentally as I was, my body did not respond anywhere as quickly. I used to be rocket-out-of-the-gate in that regard, but now I seem to need much longer for the physical process of lubrication to get started. Once that happens though, . It's the most intense sex I've ever had; the feelings are incredible. You and your husband are going to have to find out together how your new body works and that may take a little time, but believe me, it's worth every ounce of effort you put into it.
  #8  
Unread 01-07-2008, 09:37 AM
OW!!! I thought the first time wouldn't hurt!!!

I had TVH (kept ovaries) Nov 2007. Finally got the all clear and DH was kind enough to let ME decide when I was in the mood! (what a guy!) I actually waited a couple days cuz it felt like all the pressure was on me! Sheeeeesh! nothing like a bit of performance anxiety to enhance the mood! *L* anyway, for us....we discovered him being on top was actually a better position, my thighs were positioned to stop him from going too deep if I felt uncomfortable. it took quite a bit of ummm patients(sp?) and "stretching" but we eventually got things going in the right direction. I can't say it was THE BEST experience of my life but I think that was my fault! I was SOOOO tense waiting for pain that I couldn't relax into the moment. so hopefully next time I can relax and enjoy our physical life again.

PS> the "O" is still there, just different but good. *blushing* I hear it only gets better from here.....
  #9  
Unread 01-07-2008, 11:53 AM
OW!!! I thought the first time wouldn't hurt!!!

Thanks for posting your experiences! I will have the okay this Fri to try, plus its my 40th b-day and well, we'll be celebrating that! I always have KY on hand so hopefully that will help with lubrication. I may even go and buy those inserts to try...they look like pearls. Anyone try them? At any rate, maybe a couple of glasses of wine will help take away the anxiety that I feel knowing that Friday will be here before I know it!!
  #10  
Unread 01-07-2008, 12:00 PM
OW!!! I thought the first time wouldn't hurt!!!

  Quote:
Originally Posted by Marisol52
I don't know if either of you kept your ovaries, but if you didn't vaginal atrophy may be the culprit here--lack of estrogen causes thinning of the vaginal walls and can reduce their flexibility as well..... that's why intercourse wasn't comfortable for me the first time after surgery either. I immediately got some Estrace vaginal cream prescribed by my gyno, and within a very short time everything was back to normal (until I forgot to use it for a while recently-will never do that again!) However, whether or not you have your ovaries, it probably wouldn't hurt to always have artificial lubrication (such as Astroglide) on hand--our bodies are still healing and it may be quite a while longer before everything's back to "normal".

I had the same experience. First time hurt badly. I'd describe it more like burning. Couldn't understand it because it wasn't a "dryness" issue. Told my doctor and she said I had some vaginal atrophy. She started me on HRT and told me to wait two more weeks before trying again.

Well I can tell you it made all the difference. No pain - whatsoever anymore!! Things are better now than ever!

Hang in there and don't hesitate to talk to you doctor!!
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