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Help me help my family please! Help me help my family please!

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  #1  
Unread 03-05-2008, 11:45 AM
Help me help my family please!

Can I please have some advice, ideas, on how to help my family. Ways to help them understand how I will be feeling. I have a hubby, and 4 children who range in ages from 3-11.

I am having surgery on Tuesday and I know that it will be hardest on me but I don't want to leave them out either. I want them to have some sort of understanding on how I will feel.

Any advice or suggestions will be greatly appreciated...

Thanks!!!!
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  #2  
Unread 03-05-2008, 03:06 PM
Help me help my family please!

I will second your question as I also have hubby and 4 kids (ages 7-14).

None of them are seeming to get it that mama will not be able to be "supermom" for awhile. And all my hubby can think of the added stress he'll be under. Not one of them have expressed concern for me or how I'll be feeling. I keep hoping that as it gets closer it will click with them.

I don't want to be upset with them, like you I want to help them understand.
  #3  
Unread 03-05-2008, 05:05 PM
Help me help my family please!

I wish I knew what to say. I also need some advice. Firstly three of my friends had the surgery and bounced back quickly. So, needless to say my husband thinks I will be the same. My surgery is scheduled for the 14th of this month and he thinks I'll be ready for Easter and a big birthday bash the next week. well, I don't know! I don't mean to sound like a baby but i don't want to feel badly about feeling bad. I'll keep looking at this thread for someone to give advice on how NOT to have to explain every second of every day that "right now I CAN'T do it all!"
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  #4  
Unread 03-05-2008, 05:07 PM
Help me help my family please!

The one thing that helped me is changing myself and making myself the priority rather than household items, accepting that dishes might just have to be in the sink type of thing. Maybe try to call a family meeting and let them know what your needs and fears are and map out a plan for everyone to help and then just make sure that you are not expecting 'supermom' results. And really take advantage of these boards. Both the pre-op and post-op boards were life savers for me. These sisters will let you talk about anything....and I mean anything and there is a lot of wisdom to be found here. And if all you need is to vent, we are here to listen. Best wishes to both of you!
  #5  
Unread 03-05-2008, 05:41 PM
Help me help my family please!

thank you. I agree this web-site has helped me a great deal. I will continue to read all I can and I will ask that family "remember" I am only human and if dishes are in the sink so be it. I think I will schedule my family meeting this Sunday. thank you.
  #6  
Unread 03-05-2008, 05:55 PM
Help me help my family please!

Go to the MisterHyster section of this site and print the information for your husbands. They will read it, understand more of what to expect before, during and following surgery, and they can inform the children as appropriate. This source is so full of great info for everyone regarding the hysterectomy journey. No reason for them to be in the dark about any of it.

Best wishes!
  #7  
Unread 03-05-2008, 06:01 PM
Help me help my family please!

Hi
remember everyone will recover differently, in terms of your 3 friends bouncing back quickly etc. Dont hide things from the family, communicate if you dont feel well, ask for and allow some help etc.
You might be surprised at the kids, they are more in tune then we think
God bless
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