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Need to let out some emotions (child mentioned) Need to let out some emotions (child mentioned)

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Unread 10-11-2008, 11:21 PM
Need to let out some emotions (child mentioned)

Hello everyone. I am 28 years old and Have a 3 year old son. soon to be 4. I had my surgery on sept 29th. Got sent home from the castle on Oct the 1st. The first week home My son was amazing. He listened to everything that I told him. Never fought with me or nothing. Then the second week home he was really bad.. Wasn't listening to a thing I said. was giving me attudie like you wouldn't believe. On Friday (Oct 10th) I was lying in bed watching cartoons with him. My DH had to go into work for a bit. My son was acting up so much that i started crying. My DH walks in asks why i am crying. I told him that i can't do this anymore. I think my son hates me.. I told him how bad he has been. When My DH talked to our son and asked him why he has been so bad.. he said becuase he hates that mommy is sick and she can't play with me or cuddle with me at all.. That she isn't putting me to bed and not going outside to play.
I don't know how to react to this.. because he is so mad that I am sick and can't do anything with him besides watch movies or play cars with him on the couch.. Has anyone else had this before....
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Unread 10-11-2008, 11:29 PM
Need to let out some emotions (child mentioned)

Hi Kathy!

I wasn't able to have a child myself, but until others come along who can share, perhaps the following article may prove helpful:

Telling Children About Hysterectomy

The article was written based on comments shared through the years by members of

Best wishes for a continued good recovery!

Unread 10-12-2008, 04:56 AM
Need to let out some emotions (child mentioned)

Hi There

I dont have a 4 yr old but I am finding my 16 yr old daughter not liking the fact that I'm not doign all the stuff for her that I usually do, she watches me going about slowly and I feel I'm getting on her nerves, other times she will ask me if I need anything, They are just used to us doing so much with/for them that they develop a selfish attitude towards us when we are not doing, it will pass (as soon as we are back to normal) it is hurtful but I try not to take it to personal. hugs to ye all goign thru recovery and family stuff

Trish x
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Unread 10-12-2008, 08:09 AM
Need to let out some emotions (child mentioned)

This has upset his balance. Children act out when they are upset, especially at that age, because they can't really find the words to express themselves. My son was 4 when I had my surgery. You should talk to him and let him know, that even though you are sick right now, you will get better. Assure him that when you do get better, you will be able to do all of the things you did before. In the meantime, keep doing small things with him. Does he like to color. Maybe play board games, or do a puzzle together. Those are all things you can do while resting. I know it is hard trying to recover when you have small children. Hang in there.
Unread 10-12-2008, 08:23 AM
Need to let out some emotions (child mentioned)

My kids have been through alot in the last year or so and have handled it pretty well. My son who is now 6 has taken to more rocking time with me and cuddling time laying in bed. Just try to explain it to him and maybe do some rocking time, reading time, cards, games, puzzles.

When you feel better maybe a special lunch outing McD's or Chuck E Cheese is always a big hit with my group.

Best of luck

Unread 10-12-2008, 08:29 AM
Need to let out some emotions (child mentioned)

Oh goodness! it is the AGE. My son will be 4 in November and he has SERIOUSLY selective hearing, LOL. He ignores me a good percentage of the time unless I raise my voice. Which, i HATE doing. I have found that we had to modify our activities. Instead of rolling around on the floor playing, we sit on the floor and race cars. Also, I have started laying in the bed watching a cartoon with him. LOW IMPACT, LOL. You are just going to have to find other ways to interact with him. And always remind him to be careful of your belly. It is the AGE. Dont worry, you will get through this.
Unread 10-12-2008, 09:24 AM
Need to let out some emotions (child mentioned)

Sorry you are having such a hard time. I laughed a little because just last night I said "He HATES me!" (referring to my 2 yo) My boys are 2, 4, & 6. Since my surgery, I have cried with my 6 yo - just over frustration, etc. He looked at me like I was nuts - I have never broken down in front of him before.

The biggest problem has been my 2 yo. He wants NOTHING to do with me. He keeps saying "daddy do it". He has also developed some behavior issues over the past 2 weeks - he is biting - at home & at the babysitter's house. He also knows that I can't pick him up...which means he knows I can't pick him up & take him to "time out" when he is acting up.

My 4 yo has had his ups & downs. Last night he was snuggling on the couch with me and said "I know, I the belly!". He then told me "Mom, you're the best mom in the whole world". That made it all worthwhile!!!

So...hang in there. I think all of us with small children are very LUCKY but we also have different issues to deal with during recovery. I know personally it has contributed to my "feelings of worthlessness" during my recovery. I think it's important to remember that this is just a short time in the scheme of things. Once we are recovered, we will be able to do even more for our families...

Good Luck!

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