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Handling situations and other people Handling situations and other people

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Unread 11-09-2008, 01:37 AM
Handling situations and other people

Do any of you find it hard to deal with day to day life when you are in pain. Pain that you really can't explain to others because the nature of it.

I had a lousy week last week. I ended up ticking some people off becuase I simply could not follow through with a volunteer position. I totally went off the deep end with another situation all because the pain was taking its toll on me.

I hated dropping the volunteer position in meet director's lap, but I had come to realize that it was taking so much of my energy and the energy I needed just to take care of my family. My pain meds were changed and that has helped somewhat, but not entirely. Since my surgery is December 8th, I know that I have to get meals put away, Christmas shopping done and make sure that I can take it easy in the process.

I find myself apologizing more than I should have to because people just don't really understand even if they say they do.
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Unread 11-09-2008, 12:32 PM
Handling situations and other people

Yes, the pain does affect my day to day life. I deal with it the best I can, but have learned over the years to listen to my body and rest when I can. If that means not doing something that I usually do, so be it. I only have one body. Over the years I have found people to be more understanding once they understand what I am dealing with. While my disability isn't apparent always, some days it is very apparent.

I do not see a need to apologize for my body. It is not my fault and I have to take care of me. It's not been easy and it's taken me many years to get to this point. I use to try to tough it out and put on a smiley face and than suffer, but I can no longer do so.

Unread 11-09-2008, 06:32 PM
Handling situations and other people

I have come to the point where I simply tell people, "I am not feeling well and I have to go home now," for example. Taking care of yourself first is so important. You do not have to do it all!
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Unread 11-09-2008, 06:40 PM
Handling situations and other people

It is hard. The snide remarks I got today because I managed through the pain. People just don't understand. It is debilitating, but I don't want everyone to know my personal business.

Had I caught up with my doctor at the meet today, I would have begged him to make my surgery date sooner.
Unread 11-13-2008, 11:02 AM
Handling situations and other people

I to feel like ever since my first surgery, everyone is sick and tired of me being "sick". It's not my fault my body won't cooperate. Do they REALLY think, this is how I want to live my life? If I talk pain killers I'm an addict, if I don't I'm a martyr, what the heck do you do? I don't believe in being in pain. It exhausts me, and makes me cranky. But the fog that my medication sometimes leaves me in is no fun either. What do you do?
Unread 11-13-2008, 11:21 AM
Handling situations and other people

I feel the same way. Oh, she's sick again. Another surgery what now? The best is when they give their opinions and they have no, idea what they are talking about. "Id just deal with it and get on with my life" sure you would!!
You really find out who your true friends are when you go through something like this.

If people only knew how horrible it is for people to deal with PAIN everyday I think they think twice before saying or doing thinks that would be hurtful.
Just walk in my shoes........it's really sad people are so cold these days.
Unread 11-13-2008, 01:49 PM
Handling situations and other people

It's horrible not only having to live through the pain, but having to deal with everyone around you not understanding. One of my bosses, while being understanding about my sick days and upcoming surgery, looked at me once and said "you're just going to have to learn to live with it". Right - YOU live with this pain and the restrictions it puts on your life!! I'm fortunate to have a DH who not only understands the pain, but is there for me during all of it. I can't tell you how many nights/hours he's spent holding my hand while in the ER, how many times he's carried me from the bathroom to our bed, etc. I don't know what I'll do if my upcoming surgery doesn't relieve my situation, though. I'm trying to stay positive, though! Thank god for this site and all of you ladies - you keep me sane & informed!! ~Katie
Unread 11-15-2008, 09:18 PM
Handling situations and other people

Hi there ladies,

I'm right there with you. I have a great boss who is being very supportive, but I know that she really has no idea what I'm going through. I grew up with a very hypochondriac mom so I keep my mouth shut til I can't any more. My wonderful DH has learned that if I say I'm hurting and something is wrong, it is! Like you, Katie, he's been with me through so much...I don't know what I'd do without him.

I have a huge fear of being labeled a drug seeker; my gyn won't give me anything stronger than the Lortab I'm on right now. He knows I'm in pain, but I think I've maxed the Lortab out. It will knock the pain down for awhile, but not like it used to. I'm just hoping, hoping, hoping for the best outcome of my surgery on 12/4 to take down the adhesions and remove my right ovary and tube.

Good luck to you too; we are all here for you!

Unread 11-16-2008, 12:26 AM
Handling situations and other people

I have been blessed to have a great dh by myside through this struggle. I agree that you find out who your true friends are when you go through this stuff like this especially when an end doesn't seem to be in sight.

Being a martyr only adds to it.

Some days I just want to scream "WALK IN MY SHOES FOR A DAY-ONE OF MY BAD DAYS".

I am going to bed and will catch up on other replies tomorrow.
Unread 11-17-2008, 08:51 AM
Handling situations and other people

Lisa - please keep us posted on how your 12/4 surgery goes. Know that we are thinking postive thoughts for a successful surgery and recovery!! Take care of yourself. ~Katie

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