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Sudden panic regarding upcoming surgery.... Sudden panic regarding upcoming surgery....

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Unread 01-08-2009, 01:25 PM
Sudden panic regarding upcoming surgery....

I have my hyster planned for Jan 28th....I haven't been too worried about it until today when it finally hit me what I am actually about to go through in just a few weeks!!! I mean...the 28th is SOON!!

-I am scared of the pain....
-I am scared of the surgery....
-I am scared of not feeling like "a whole woman" anymore....
and so on and on and on.....

I am usually a very calm, rational person BUT today my mind is spinning in all negative directions possible.
I am pretty much freaking out!

Please, does any of you have a few words of comfort for me?
I could really need your help today

Thank you,
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Unread 01-08-2009, 02:02 PM
Sudden panic regarding upcoming surgery....

Hi Eli,

I think I hit this point about three weeks before my surgery, too. Most of us are pretty scared as we face this surgery, and the waiting is the worst part.

The pain is manageable. Is there someone who can be in your hospital room with you after the surgery to advocate for you and make sure your pain needs are addressed promptly? My husband used the call button a couple times for me. My nursing care was excellent, but I found it very reassuring to have someone else there to speak on my behalf.

The surgery is one of the lowest risk major surgeries a woman can have and it's a common surgery for medical professionals to perform. Although it was a landmark event for me, it was pretty routine for the doctor and everyone else in the OR. They know what they're doing.

As for feeling like a whole woman, that's a concern for many of us. I decided that although many of the important experiences in my life as a woman were connected to my uterus, what makes me a woman every day isn't about any of those things. It's about my heart and my soul and how I relate to people and how I feel and how people feel about me. My womanliness is about who I am and how I am, not about what parts I have or don't have.

Even if isn't normal for you to have negative feelings, remember that it also isn't normal for you to be facing this particular experience. It's a big deal, and it would be surprising if you weren't concerned. Meanwhile, remember to breathe and that we'll hold your hand through this as best as we can.
Unread 01-08-2009, 02:03 PM
Sudden panic regarding upcoming surgery....

Hi Eli!
What you are feeling is very normal, and your emotions and fear can be sooo hard to control the closer you get to your date.

What helped me was, I did not allow myself to think of the actual procedure, or the pain from recovery. I already had so much pain that I figured atleast recovery/healing pain has a light at the end of the tunnel.

I focused on myself after the procedure was done. I imagined myself in that recovery bed, safe and healthy, no complications and on the road to healing. I pictured what my life was going to be like and how much better I was going to feel after.

I know the mind is a very hard thing to control. But really try to paint a picture of yourself afterwards and hold on to that thought

Remember that we are so much more women in our brains and hearts than in our uterus's.

I did also go to my doctor and get a small prescritpion of ativan for the last 5 days pre-op. That way I also slept better, and took it myself (with the okay from my surgeon) the morning of the operation.

You will do great!
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Unread 01-08-2009, 02:25 PM
Sudden panic regarding upcoming surgery....

Hi Eliana!

Of course, everyone has a different experience, so all I can do is tell you about mine and hope that it gives you some reassurance.

1. Pain. No one wants you to be in pain, and a great deal of time and effort goes into keeping you comfortable. Severe pain would only send you into shock, and the medical staff certainly don't want that to happen! I never felt any pain from the surgery itself, but I will tell you that I had awful gas pain (which is common). Gas meds, getting up and moving around and lying on your right side when in bed helped me immeasurably.

2. You will be asleep during the surgery, so you won't be aware of anything to frighten you. I know that may sound flippant, but it's the truth. When you wake up, it will all be over with. Keep your mind on that truth.

3. You will be better than a "whole woman". You will be a healthier woman. That's the bottom line.

Don't fight "freaking out". It's normal. Sit down, freak out and then let yourself go on to better things. Make plans, find answers to your questions, become informed if you have not already done so. Keep your mind occupied as much as possible. Remember that you are having this surgery for a good reason. As scary as it is, the alternative must be scarier, otherwise you wouldn't be bothering with the surgery.

And remember that you have all of us here rooting for you! <hugs>
Unread 01-08-2009, 02:34 PM
Sudden panic regarding upcoming surgery....

I am a complete baby when it comes to pain & I too was scared to death. But it turned out fine. The pain was not as bad as I thought it was going to be at all. The hospital will keep you as comfortable as they can. Once you get home have a little station set up for yourself with the things you will need & you will feel in control of that. It is very normal to be so scared but you too will be ok. Best wishes.
Unread 01-08-2009, 02:37 PM
Sudden panic regarding upcoming surgery....


Two weeks I had the same feelings, I started thinking perhaps I should wait. Then Sunday I started cramping, I guess my ureters got the memo that I was getting rid of it, because it is 1 week early. So the 10-12 day period will start. Today, after days of spotting, The pain has gotten worse, and my flow is just starting, I am in bed, going to the bathroom every hour. My second thoughts are gone. I know why I am doing this. My whole life has been planned around my cycle. I hate surgery also. But I hope I will free of planning my life around my cycle. Just keep in mind your future, As linda says "we are so much more women in our brains and hearts than in our uterus's." ( hope you do not mind linda)

Lot's of luck to you!
Unread 01-08-2009, 04:01 PM
Sudden panic regarding upcoming surgery....

I am scared too! My LAVH is scheduled for next Wednesday, 6 days away. I am most scared that the surgery won't solve my problems. I have been reading on another board of ladies having bowel cramping weeks after their surgery, and this actually terrifies me. I had no idea this was a side effect of surgery and now I'm wondering if it is permanent or not and how bad it is. Besides my adeno pelvic pain, I'm dealing with bowel/gastric issues right now and I had it in my head that that all would go away with my surgery so I'm in a panc that I'll have it forever. . . I did have tummy and bowel tests (endoscopy, colonoscopy) that were negative so I've just been assuming my problems were due to the adeno and would go away with the surgery.

I am such a basketcase! HELP!

BTW, Lynnin, that was beautiful what you wrote. . .

Unread 01-08-2009, 04:08 PM
Sudden panic regarding upcoming surgery....

Joriebelle, I don't know what kind of bowel/gastric issues you are having, but before my surgery, I had problems with what felt like gall bladder problems. I felt unidentifiable discomfort; a colonoscopy came back negative.

Since my surgery, I have had NO recurrence of that kind of thing. It's been wonderful! My doc told me that the removal of my large and lumpy uterus would mean that my other abdominal organs would be much happier and would work more effectively; you may find that the same thing will happen to you!
Unread 01-08-2009, 04:22 PM
Sudden panic regarding upcoming surgery....

Thank you, to all of you who have taken the time to reply to my post.
It feels good to know that I am not alone in all this...
Unread 01-08-2009, 04:39 PM
Sudden panic regarding upcoming surgery....

Hi Eli -

What you are feeling is perfectly normal. I thought I was all set for the surgery, and then a week before, I was overcome with nerves and worries.

I spent a lot of time on Hystersisters reading what other women had to say, and that helped a lot. In reading all of the comments the other Sisters have given you, I have to agree 100%. The pain will not be as bad as you think, and you will be able to manage it with the help of the hospital staff.

I put off my hysterectomy for longer than I should have, partly out of fear and partly out of feeling that I wanted to "let nature take its course" but what nature was telling me was, my uterus was interfering with my life: the anemia, the pain, the bleeding, etc...It was hurting the rest of my body, and by having the surgery, I was making a decision to live my best possible life instead of allowing my enormous fibroid-ridden uterus to rule my life.

You are still a whole woman! And you will feel more like a whole woman, not less! Sometimes I just close my eyes and think, wow, I did it, now my life can really begin again. We are so much stronger than we give ourselves credit for!

I wish you all the best.

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