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almost 5 months post op venting- KIDS MENTIONED almost 5 months post op venting- KIDS MENTIONED

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  #1  
Unread 01-12-2009, 04:33 PM
almost 5 months post op venting- KIDS MENTIONED

Okay, so I am almost 5 months post-op. I am having issues with low energy. I just want to nap. This comes and goes but has been on for a couple weeks this time. I am 29. I am too young to be this tired. I also still am tender from time to time and I have swelly belly frequently. The doctor tells me to give myself time. That it can take up to a year to heal and have all that figured out. The thing is...I have a 3 yr old. He is a very high energy kid. I also stay at home with him and take care of the house, so I don't get to sit down much. I do not have any family near by to help me take it easy and my husband feels that it has been 5 months and I shouldn't be having trouble, even though he heard the dr said it can take up to a year. So my day consists of chasing the kid (who is in full out trecherous 3's), taking care of the house, and my husband works and travels frequently. And I can't be weak or I get a guilt trip. If I have any tenderness or want to sit down for half a day, my husband says "if you still feel like this tomorrow, I think we need to call the dr." Sorry, I am ranting.

Anyway, is it normal to feel so tired even 5 months out? I know the swelly belly and tenderness is okay. But can it really take up to a year? REALLY?! Anyone have ideas on how to keep up with the kid and household chores without overdoing? I am on a good nutrition schedule. And my thyroid is in order, so I know it isn't that. I feel like I want to break down but don't have time for it. So I just keep going and getting more worn out. Could the constant going of my day hinder my recovery? Sorry to vent ladies. I love my kid and my husband. But my husband seems to think he deserves a medal for taking two weeks off work to help me out after my hyst. And I sit there and say REALLY!? He didn't do anything those two weeks. He took care of the kid and did some laundry and occassionally ran the vacuum. And I am tired of hearing everyone say how wonderful my husband is. I think I might scream if I hear it again. He didn't go thru the surgery. He wasn't sliced open and then be expected to act like life is a-okay and go back to schedule. He acts like I ask a lot if I need him to come home 30 minutes early. Of if on a saturday, I sleep in. I guess his support is wearing off. I don't know. Am I supposed to be this tired and worn out? Does anyone else have a problem with husbands and family members not getting it?

Sorry so long. Take care ladies and have a great night.
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  #2  
Unread 01-12-2009, 05:33 PM
almost 5 months post op venting- KIDS MENTIONED

are you able to take any hrt (i see you have endo)? a lot of how you feel might be hormonal.
can you send your son to preschool in the mornings or afternoons to give you a break during the day?
  #3  
Unread 01-12-2009, 05:56 PM
almost 5 months post op venting- KIDS MENTIONED

odd that you mention preschool. i just got a brochure in the mail today and I am not sure why...I am looking into it. I am taking HRT but just a very low dose to stop the worst of the symptoms. Maybe I should talk to the dr about up'ing vs endo regrowth?
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  #4  
Unread 01-12-2009, 06:43 PM
almost 5 months post op venting- KIDS MENTIONED

I'm 10 months out and can relate I also have a 3 yr old boy and a 5 yr old girl at home my husband works away from home so it's up to me to take care of everything at home during the week. My husband got a week off when I came home from the hospital and he did help the 1st week but since it's been hard I am still very tired and still have issues with my belly. I did put my daughter in full day school and son in part time preschool. You do need time just to relax so preschool maybe good for both you and your child. Bad days do come but they also go. Take care and try to heal.
  #5  
Unread 01-12-2009, 07:56 PM
almost 5 months post op venting- KIDS MENTIONED

Although I feel tons better, I still get very tired really easy. Fourtunatley I have a wonderful hubby who understands, and who seen me go through hell w/ complications. I am a stay home mom to a 13 year old and I still take my daily naps, because my body says so. Have your hubby read some posts on here and he can see it's not just you who are going through a slow recovery. Also if he is not to weak stomached, have him watch a video on a TAH. Might make him see a little clearer.
Hope you feel better soon.
's
Diana
  #6  
Unread 01-12-2009, 08:14 PM
almost 5 months post op venting- KIDS MENTIONED

i dont know anything about hrt and endo..i wish i could help you. the preschool might be nice..maybe a 9-12 type of thing..just a few hours for you to refuel. feel better soon!
  #7  
Unread 01-12-2009, 08:28 PM
almost 5 months post op venting- KIDS MENTIONED

Oh man, I feel your pain. My surgery (I'm new, can't remember the acronym for having incision & just uterus removed!) was almost two weeks ago & I'm already feeling the support start to fade a bit. I'm 29 & I have a six year old son, 3.5 year old (high maintenance) daughter, & 10 week old daughter. My husband is a very involved dad but he is self-employed so he was only off for five days post-surgery & then my mother helped me last week, luckily she lives in the same town. I have been recovering quite well & I'm also not a big complainer & I try to put on a happy face (even went to playgroup with my mom & kids on day 6, I did mostly sit). But I'm starting to feel like I'm doing myself a disservice by trying to be so capable. Even today on day 12 post-surgery my mom helped me for half the day & then went home & I stood & walked a cranky baby for most of the afternoon. I am wiped out tonight. But I blame myself for not advocating for myself more & asking for the help. I'll start out feeling pretty good but as the day wears on I get more & more tired.

And I know exactly what you mean about keeping up with the kids & house & having nothing left for yourself. And my husband is really hands-on with the kids but I too get tired of people giving him so much credit for simply BEING A DAD! Do we as moms ever get credit for staying home with our kids?? And still getting the house picked up, dinner on the table, clothes washed, etc? And after major surgery no less?? I think we just need some empathy from our husbands & it would go a long way.

Sheeeesh, I guess I have a few complaints after all And I'm pretty sure I need some hormone replacement even though my ovaries are still in. I felt really funky after baby #2, increased my estrogen & it made all the difference. I agree with the poster who mentioned you might want to look into HRT, it's worth a shot. And I think you should consider preschool or something where you get some time to decompress alone or something, maybe a babysitter now & then too. My oldest is in school & the younger ones are in a great drop-off program I can take them to any morning & I love it.

((HUGS!!)) Hope it gets better soon, if it doesn't, have a heart-to-heart with your husband & also tell him you need to look into pre-schools!

joanna

***
  #8  
Unread 01-13-2009, 02:35 PM
almost 5 months post op venting- KIDS MENTIONED

I am almost 5 months post op and did my first full week at work last week - I have been working full time but have done some of my hours from home each day so that I wasn't too exhausted for the hour commute home in heavy traffic.

I slept for 8 hours on friday night, 9 hours on saturday night and still had to have a 2 hour nap on sunday!

I am just about coping with a demanding job and have no idea how I would cope with an demanding child so hats off to all you Mums out there.
  #9  
Unread 01-13-2009, 03:09 PM
almost 5 months post op venting- KIDS MENTIONED

I agree with Katy.... I don't have any children to take care of and I still need a nap after work... Could you lay down when the 3 yr. old does?
Even if it's for an hour, it would help.
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