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6 days out and I just wanna cry! (kids mentioned) 6 days out and I just wanna cry! (kids mentioned)

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Unread 03-13-2009, 12:07 AM
6 days out and I just wanna cry! (kids mentioned)

I was scheduled for LSH, however due to complications during my surgery, my Dr had to open me up, I have a small incision near my belly button, and a much larger one at the bikini line.
I am so tired of all that I cant do right now......I cant sleep in my own bed cause I cant get comfortable, and I am terrified my fiancee will bump me in his sleep so every time he moves, I jump....I've given up trying to sleep in bed and have been on the couch since I got home from the hospital Sunday. I really miss snuggling with him in bed at night. Right now he is afraid to even hug me for fear of hurting me.
I miss snuggling with my kids too. My boys are 6 and 4, very rambuctious, so I've been making them kinda keep their distance so they dont accidentally bump me. Yesterday, I was laying on the couch, and my son was sitting on the floor in front of me.....his elbow hit my stomach two different times when he was getting up. My 4 yr old loves to come running to me for hugs, but I am afraid to let him do that right now, as his head is even with one of my incisions.
I am tired of being sore....getting up and down is hard, and I cant even put my own pants on! Since I am moving slower, the other night, by the time I got off the couch and was able to head to the bathroom, I started wetting myself by the time I got there.....then couldnt even bend over to pick my pants up off the floor! My fiancee said it was no big deal, helped me into new pants, but I was so embarrassed!

My hips are sore from only being able to lay on my side or back. By the time evening comes around, my butt hurts from sitting all day.
I am so bored! There is only so much TV and movies one can watch! My finacee bought me two books the day I came home, but I cant get into them, my mind keeps wandering to all the stuff I want to be up and doing.
I am VERY independant and I am not doing a good job of dealing with all that I cant do right now. My finacee would wait on me hand and foot if I would let him, but I cant allow that.
I dont know if the emotions are from wanting to be back to normal and up and about, or some kind of reaction to the hysterectomy.
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Unread 03-13-2009, 02:03 AM
6 days out and I just wanna cry! (kids mentioned)

Hugs to you!

I know how you feel... I was there. I had a TAH/LSO (abdominal incision with removal of uterus plus left ovary). I was in EXTREME pain afterward... drugs didn't control it. Then at home, the recovery was brutal. I couldn't get comfortable; I had bladder spasms; I had sore breasts and night sweats. I would get active, then have bad pain and have to stop again.

I am saying all of this because I can report that there is an end to all of this! I was 9wks on Monday. I now feel back to normal. I went back to work at 6wks, and felt pretty good, albeit sore and some vaginal/rear end pressure feelings. I tried starting the exercise back up at various points during recovery period, but I would have to stop due to pain/swelling. Last week, I was able to start back into my exercise program. I have no pain/discomfort whatsoever. The only thing different I notice is that my stomach is "flabbier" and my regular pants are very tight on me even though I actually lost weight.

You will be fine... it feels horrible at first, but you will get better. But do expect a "roller coaster" recovery.. that really confounded me.. I'd never experienced that before.

Take care,

Unread 03-13-2009, 09:39 AM
6 days out and I just wanna cry! (kids mentioned)

awww... i'm so sorry you are in that "place".... i remember being there and everything you said sounds SOOOOO FAMILIAR!!! trust me, you aren't alone and for the most part, everything you are feeling seems to be normal at this stage of recovery.

like you, i'm extremely independant!! relying on other people isn't easy for me at all!! but sometimes in life you have to accept the help and love of others. it could be much worse... there are women that have nobody, no help and are all alone. it might be hard to do, but relax and be thankful you have those around you that love you so dearly.

ok now that the serious stuff is out of the way... let's get to the funny stuff. you wet yourself. not funny at all. but someday you might look at it differently. I SOAKED THE BED!!! i was MORTIFIED!!! SO EMBARRASSED!!! i woke my fiance up, in tears, to tell him not to roll over and he pulled me close and whispered "it's going to be ok, your body has went through hell and it's not the end of the world, i love you" ... AHHH! i needed that SO MUCH!! he even washed all the bedding and went to the store and bought me those big flat pads for me to sleep on and adult diapers!!! now that's LOVE and even though i was mortified at the time, i'm 34yrs old and my kids don't even wet the bed, i can giggle about it now!!! heck, i'm still wettin myself when i pass gas!! but it's not the end of the world and someday soon i'm going to be fixed.

my mother always told me "this too, shall pass" ... give yourself time to heal. i almost died after my first surgery, so i'm just thankful to be alive right now.
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Unread 03-13-2009, 01:40 PM
6 days out and I just wanna cry! (kids mentioned)

Sorry you are feeling bad but it has only been a week! Give yourself a break :-)

My DH & I have always slept like spoons, with him behind me & I was concerned that we wouldn't be able to do that when I first got home but it worked just fine. It sort of helped having him right up behind me so that I couldn't move too much.

I am sure your boys are missing their hugs so how about reading a book to them with them snuggled up beside you on the sofa? Just getting some attention may help them to feel a bit closer to you.

As for the leaking, start practicing kegals as soon as you can, it will help. But as you are moving slower you do need to give yourself a bit more time to get to the bathroom. And although I couldn't bend from the waist I could use my knees to bend down and pick things up fairly quickly.
Unread 03-13-2009, 04:12 PM
6 days out and I just wanna cry! (kids mentioned)

I understand about being independent. Let me tell ya, if you let him wait on you hand and foot, you'll heal much faster! Then you'll be able to do for yourself again. I'm 4 weeks post and my doc just seen me the other day and said I'm all healed! I'm cleared for everything,including sex, except heavy lifting for 2 more weeks. I know my dh had a lot to do with that as he waited on me and wouldn't let me do a thing. I healed I also understand the boredom and hurting from sitting too long. All I can suggest is change positions often and give yourself more time to get around. Everyday will get better. However, a bit a advise...when you do start to feel better, don't think you can overdue it. You will set yourself back.

Enjoy the pampering, I will keep you in my thoughts. Happy healing ((Hugs))
Unread 03-13-2009, 04:36 PM
6 days out and I just wanna cry! (kids mentioned)

I know how you feel. My surgery was changed mid surgery to open abdominal. The pain was terrible. It does get better. My the middle of the second week I was able to move around much better. Hang in there

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