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Lifting 1 Year Old and 3 Year Old after Rectocele Repair Lifting 1 Year Old and 3 Year Old after Rectocele Repair

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Unread 05-24-2009, 04:28 PM
Lifting 1 Year Old and 3 Year Old after Rectocele Repair

Hi everyone

I am new here but very glad to find this website.

I've been told that I've got a 'moderate' rectocele and have a rectocele repair operation booked for early July. I had 3 pages of questions to ask the consultant at the hospital - since I discovered the rectocele I've been so worried and scared. For example, I still want to breastfeed my one year old - will I still be able to do that? How will I cope through 12 weeks of not being able to lift at all especially when I have 2 small children? I think I've got answers to the above (although I'd be interested to hear about anybody else's experiences with this) but...

One thing that really worries me though is whether or not I can, or indeed, should ever lift the children (especially when they are so young) after the operation (even after the 12 week no lifting ban) ever again. Does anyone have any knowledge or experience of this in reality and in practice? If I do lift them after the 12 week no lifting ban, do I risk another prolapse?
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Unread 05-25-2009, 08:02 AM
Re: Lifting 1 Year Old and 3 Year Old after Rectocele Repair

There are different repairs... and a vaginal repairs are supposedly as strong as the sacral colpopexy.. (abdominal with mesh).

I just had my 8 week post op check-up and ALL lifting restrictions are gone. Doctor said it was fine to lift 25-50 lbs at this point, but that I should hold off lifting 100 pounds till my 3 month mark.

I feel great so far - if you haven't sought out a specialist (a uro-gyn) I would do that!
Unread 05-25-2009, 08:14 AM
Re: Lifting 1 Year Old and 3 Year Old after Rectocele Repair

I can sympathize! My son was less than a year old when I had my 1st surgery and my mom stayed with me the whole 12 weeks so I didn't have to lift. Unfortunately things failed and I can't rule out that it wasn't because I didn't listen to the stop lifting rule after recovery. My 2nd surgery I prepared my son for no more lifting. I started by getting rid of the high chair and getting him to climb into a booster seat at the table with a step stool. Also I had him out of the crib and into the transitional toddler bed at 15mos. We just put lots of pillows and blankets on the floor and at first he spent many night running around and sleeping on the floor but after a month he loves his bed. I also got a light weight umbrella stroller so I can lift it in and out of the car if we go somewhere and it's one that had no tray thing so he can climb into and out of it. I find if I hold his hands and say "step up, step" he uses his feet to climb and once he's a step up like when getting into the car I can get my thigh behind him and that helps reduce the weight you are lifting. I HATED and CRIED MANY MANY days and nights about not lifting him but we have adjusted and it's harder for you than them. They LOVE being independent and in the long run they'll be stronger toddlers Shopping is hard so we either go where they have car carts so he can climb in and out or target has the carts that have the big red seats in front of the actual cart and they can walk into those. Otherwise we go in the stroller and only get a few things at a time or wait for dad to be home with him and I go alone. With all the practice climbing at home he does great at the playground but no swings unless they are low enough where I can get the stroller underneath and he climbs and stands on that and then into the swing. Just make a game out of it and they love it meanwhile you're crying inside. I envy the moms that lift! BUT I am determined to make these repairs last this time. 2 surgeries in 8 mos was enough for me! At the dr. i have the nurse lift him and just explained I have a condition that makes me unable to lift over 20-25 lbs. Start now with the transitioning and you'll see it will get easier. Don't be afraid to ask people to help out after the surgery. I hated having my mom with me for 12 weeks it was draining but worth it. You only have 1 chance to heal right! My hubby took time off too and I had friends help out. If you have any other scenarios that you want tips on no lifting just ask or pm me. Also have you kids start now if they get a boo boo try sitting on the couch to cuddle or the floor. they don't care about not lifting it's just mommy they want. My son does ask sometimes "mommy up please"? I just say honey mommy can't lift because of her boo boo but I would love to hug and snuggle on the couch and he's just as happy. Good luck! You CAN do this and make your repairs last. remember you are doing the no lifting for them so you stay prolapse free and they have a mom to run and play with! He'll be 2 in july and like I said he's adjusted great it's me who has the emotional guilt of not lifting. In an emergency I have lifted because he fell and got a bloody lip and you just make sure you bend down on a knee and bring them in close and lift with you knees and thigh muscles, carry them to someplace you can put them down again. NEVER lift by bending at the waist!!! Any intrabdominal pressure can cause failure to repairs.
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Unread 05-26-2009, 05:21 AM
Re: Lifting 1 Year Old and 3 Year Old after Rectocele Repair

Thank you both and especially 'krazykatt' for offering me the most realistic, reassuring, and comforting words I have heard in a long time. It was really good to read about the reality of how you actually cope without lifting when you have very young children. I certainly have experience of the crying and the feelings of guilt.

I am incredibly lucky because my mum will be coming for the full 12 weeks after the operation. I'm hoping this will give me the best possible chance for the repair to be a success. The children will be at nursery for some of the week as well so that's a big help. I'm also hoping to employ a cleaner which will be a strain on the finances but I think I'd be back in hospital having to have another repair in a few months if I don't.

I'd also be very interested to hear how others have coped with housework as well as looking after young children. Just one example, I like to do a thorough job when I vaccuum and move settees, chairs and tables out of the way every so often so that I know that it's really clean! I'm certainly under the impression that this wouldn't be a good idea even with a prolapse repair that has healed. Is this correct?

Krazykatt and anybody else with experience of this or ideas - one lifting problem that I can think of at the moment is, what do you do if your one year old falls asleep in the car and then you want to transfer them to a pushchair or into the cot still asleep?

Other people say I worry too much about the detail but I like to get things sorted out in my head about how I'll cope in advance and then, when I'm in the situation that I'll be in soon, I'll just get on and do it!

I can just imagine how difficult I'm going to find it not to just automatically do what I normally do, especially when I'm feeling ok again.
Unread 05-26-2009, 07:17 AM
Re: Lifting 1 Year Old and 3 Year Old after Rectocele Repair

First of all don't worry about people telling you your worrying too much because your not! I had family tell me the same thing but now that one of them is having her own prolapse issues (ironically) she realizes it wasn't so neurotic of me Falling asleep in the car is a tough one. Sometimes I am able to wake him up and he walks in on his own. Sometimes i can get the stroller all ready by the door of the car and then I sit on the seat next to the car seat and slide him onto my lap and then from my lap into the stroller. Sitting and using your upper body strength isn't as bad as lifting. Also when you do lift in an emergency, kegel while you lift as this helps support yuor pelvic floor. I have to say my wonderful hubby took over the vacuuming duties but if I had to do it I wouldn't move the furniture. I am a self proclaimed "neat freak" however I have learned to let some of that go. That too isn't easy but when you have to make a choice of you or a dust bunny then i choose me
In response to what Princess said I'd be very cautious with someone telling you you can lift that much weight. My 1st uro gyn surgeon was so called "tops" in his field and told me once I healed there were "no restrictions go live my life and what's the point of surgery if you can't go back and do what you want". Sadly I listened to that and 8 mos later was back in the O R. The 2nd surgeon i saw, along with the 3 other consults i got all cringed when they heard that. They all advised that prolapse is due to weak tissues and that if you are genetically weak even the strongest repair won't last forever but to get the most out of it you need to be cautious and make some minor adjustments in life. In retrospect many people have far worse disabilities and raise kids and live life so lifting restrictions aren't so bad, at least that's my view on it. Good luck to you
Unread 05-26-2009, 09:30 AM
Re: Lifting 1 Year Old and 3 Year Old after Rectocele Repair

Thank you 'krazykatt' for such a quick reply. Again, your words are of great comfort and I will be taking on your advice for how to manage with the children without lifting.

It's so good to be in touch with someone who really understands my worries and with such good ideas on how to cope on a practical level with the children. What you've said helps so much more than just being told, 'You'll manage" or "You'll work it out".

Thank you so much.
Unread 05-26-2009, 11:28 AM
Re: Lifting 1 Year Old and 3 Year Old after Rectocele Repair

I read your reply and my heart just went out to you because I know that feeling your having after going through it myself. I think I wrote a similar post like yours over on the U.P.R.I.S.E. prolapse support site when I first started. They are the one's who kept giving me ideas and advice which I have followed and it's helped. It is nice to be able to pass the advice along although I wish I didn't have to!
Unread 05-28-2009, 08:54 PM
Re: Lifting 1 Year Old and 3 Year Old after Rectocele Repair

Hi Krazykatt,

I'm new here too, with many of the exact same concerns as Blue Butterfly about a rectocele repair I'm planning for this summer. But I want to make sure I understand your procedures - on your last post it looks to me like you had a prolapsed uterus repaired twice - is that correct? So did you also have a rectocele repaired?

Interesting feed back you got from your first doctor about the ability to resume normal life and lifting at some point post-op, as that's what my doc is telling me. But from your experience that's not the case at all. He also told me this repair should last the remainder of my life as long as I always exhale when lifting. Is he completely wrong about this from your research?

Thanks, Lento
Unread 05-28-2009, 09:02 PM
Re: Lifting 1 Year Old and 3 Year Old after Rectocele Repair

Hi BlueButterfly,

I'm in almost the exact same boat as you. Two small kids (5 and 2) and about to schedule a rectocele repair for this summer. My doctor is telling me that this procedure will take about 4-6 weeks of "taking it easy" no lifting. Then I am supposed to be able to lift normally, but always exhale when doing so. He's also saying this repair should last a lifetime if I am careful and follow that simple rule. But after reviewing the posts on this site that seems hardly the case. So I am pretty concerned.

Was wondering if your problems are simply quality of life (difficulty with BM, etc.)? That's my case, and I've put the procedure off every year thinking I should wait until the kids are older and not requiring so much picking up. While I'm not happy about having a rectocele, it seems again from the posts I've reviewed I've got a pretty mild case which I think what you were saying about being "moderate". So maybe if the lifting of such small children is a concern you may consider postponing the repair - unless of course your problems are more severe. Just my thoughts having been in similar shoes, just a little farther down the road. Hope this helps, Lento
Unread 05-29-2009, 01:02 PM
Re: Lifting 1 Year Old and 3 Year Old after Rectocele Repair

My 1st repairs were a uterine re-suspension with a burch colposuspension for a cystocele and a rectocele repair. That failed me within 4 months and given the 12 week recovery of no lifting which I was diligent about I really had 1 month after the 12 weeks where I resumed lifting my son and then it all failed. My 2nd surgery I had a TAH with a sacral colpopexy using my own leg fascia instead of mesh. i also had another rectocele repair too. I think too many surgeons are so arrogant to think "their" surgical skills can withstand anything but the other urogyn's I consulted with for my 2nd surgery were all telling me their ARE lifetime restrictions that prolapse patients need to follow SO this time around i just don't lift anything over 20-25 lbs including my son 22 mos. Like I said he adjusted just fine it's more me that has a hard time with it but I then remind myself I'm feeling great now and prolapse free and I can enjoy MANY other activities with my son that the prolapses didn't let me before. Good luck to both of you and remember you can listen to a surgeon's advice but you do what YOU feel you want to. having been through failed surgery I would urge you to be cautious and try to make small adjustments that will help care for your repairs long term. Trust me a failed surgery is NOT what you want to go through it was too much of a heart break!

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