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Should I have my daughter stay at the hospital with me? Should I have my daughter stay at the hospital with me?

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Unread 09-17-2009, 02:43 PM
Should I have my daughter stay at the hospital with me?

I have a total vaginal hysterectomy with bladder sling and some rectal repair scheduled for Tuesday morning. I am reading that I should have someone at the hospital over night with me. I am wondering if it is a good idea to let my adult daughter stay or will I be in pain and frighten her. (She is 21 years old.) I can hire someone to do this. Any advice is appreciated. My husband will be there during the day and my mother will take some turns. The late night is the issue.
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Unread 09-17-2009, 02:48 PM
Re: Should I have my daughter stay at the hospital with me?

I was told you don't need someone at night with you when you're at the hospital but someone with you at all times when you're home. The nurses will be there to help you at night.

Good luck!
Unread 09-17-2009, 03:06 PM
Re: Should I have my daughter stay at the hospital with me?


I think it is really up to you. As for me, I didn't have anyone stay overnight with me. And quite honestly, I was so tired, I don't think I would have cared either way at that point.

Good luck, see you on the post op board.

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Unread 09-17-2009, 03:16 PM
Re: Should I have my daughter stay at the hospital with me?

I was thinking that I did not need anyone and know that I will be sleeping. My mother-in-law, a nurse, strongly suggested having an advocate there. Also on the hystersisters site, it mentions having someone round the clock as a help. Good to hear that it may not be needed. Thanks!
Unread 09-17-2009, 04:24 PM
Re: Should I have my daughter stay at the hospital with me?

Originally I didn't want DH to stay the night, then I did, then I didn't. So you might not even want someone to stay the night, even if you're supposed to have someone there! As far as the pain goes, everyone is different but I doubt you'll be in so much pain that you scare your daughter - the pain SHOULD be able to be managed with meds. I had an LAVH and honestly the pain wasn't too bad.

I never thought about having an advocate there overnight - that actually sounds like a good idea, especially if you're still really drowsy from anesthesia. The nurse kept trying to get me to stand up and walk around and I knew I couldn't do it because I'd pass out and luckily I was awake enough to refuse to do it. If I'd been groggier they might have gotten me to do it and that wouldn't have been good. So that is something to think about...

Good luck!
Unread 09-17-2009, 05:44 PM
Re: Should I have my daughter stay at the hospital with me?

JeriLynn....what is your hospitals reputation like? The hospital I was at had a great reputation for care...and my nurses were wonderful to me. I didn't need anyone to spend the night. But if your at a hospital with not so wonderful might want someone. Maybe, you might want to keep your daughter on "stand-by" that way you can call her if you need her. Good luck!!!
Unread 09-17-2009, 06:45 PM
Re: Should I have my daughter stay at the hospital with me?

Yes- I think you should have someone stay overnight. I myself had my surgery (TVT, TVH) at a well known , great reputation hospital. We tried for a private room with a fold out cot , but none were available. My husband stayed until late at night and as soon as he left.....IT WAS HORRIBLE!!! The nurses took forever to come help me (and I am not a whiny patient) and at one point on the second night it took them 45 minutes to come help me to use the bathroom. I ended up taking the leg compression stockings off an on and doing it all myself. Then one nurse just complained on and on about how much he hated his nurse job when all I wanted was some ice chips. I was so happy when my husband came the next morning. I would definately have someone lined up to be there with you (at least the first night) ,and if you think you will be ok cause you feel comfortable with the care then you can always send them home. Good Luck to you on your surgery!
Unread 09-17-2009, 08:12 PM
Re: Should I have my daughter stay at the hospital with me?


Some hospitals don't allow non-patients to stay overnight so you may want to double check on that with your hospital to find out what their policy is.

I didn't need anyone overnight in hospital with me. The nursing staff was great and I was well taken care of.

I hope everything goes well for you!

Unread 09-18-2009, 04:26 AM
Re: Should I have my daughter stay at the hospital with me?

I had an TAH and was in the hospital for 4 days. Hubby couldn't stay with me because someone had to take care of the kids but my oldest daughter who was just getting ready to turn 12 stayed with me the entire time. The entire hospital staff was so nice to her offering her snacks all of the time and even made sure she got a guest tray for meals. Her being there with me helped a lot. We also had a love seat in my hospital room that folded out into a bed.
Unread 09-18-2009, 05:47 AM
Re: Should I have my daughter stay at the hospital with me?

My daughter is 19 and she insisted on staying with me. I will be forever grateful to her for that. That first night, she helped keep track of the time so I could push the pain pump button and get my meds and she was great to talk to in the middle of the night as I became more alert (only time I'll ever be grateful for her insomnia)

The second night, it was her that was helping me get out of bed, removing the leg compressors, moving the iv stand and such to go potty. I can't even begin to imagine having to wait on a nurse for that.

I didn't think she was going to be able to handle seeing me in pain, seeing my stitches since every nurse just had to look... But she did, surprising both of us.

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