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Unread 02-22-2010, 05:25 PM

I keep crying feeling like my husband is going to find me less of a women. Although he tells me that he is happy with what we have I still can't belive him. Did anyone feel this way as well? Does the feeling ever go away?I know he loves me with all of his heart but I am really depressed about it.

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Unread 02-22-2010, 06:14 PM
Re: Husband?

I did, but I didn't get that feeling until post-op. Of course, he thought I was silly, also. It eventually went away and I feel fine now. I know he loves me and it's all good! It's normal to feel that way. I knew I would feel silly myself later but couldn't help it at the time. I knew better the whole time but the feelings were still there. Deep down I already knew he loved me with all his heart.
Unread 02-22-2010, 06:35 PM
Re: Husband?

Try to think of it as losing any other organ, like a gallbladder or spleen or appendix.. it is not useful to you any longer and it is causing you pain and discomfort. And remember, sex is 90% mental and 10% physical.. you still have the most important part (your brain) and the very functional physical part (your vagina)... so the two best things are still safe and sound :-) ... you are a beautiful, wonderful female person.. just without a part or two anymore... know that you are so supported by all your hystersisters and sounds like you have a great partner to help get you through this..
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Unread 02-22-2010, 07:01 PM
Re: Husband?

Thank you. It is great to have found this site. I really am thankful for your feed back. It is nice to know that I am not alone on any of my feelings!
Unread 02-22-2010, 07:19 PM
Re: Husband?

I'm there too....I'm having a really hard time with it. I even have dreams where I wake up in the recovery room and my doc tells me that my husband left because I'm not a real woman anymore.
I cry over it...ALOT....and unfortunately my DH just laughs, he doesn't try to comfort me, just tells me I'm stupid to be thinking that way.
Unread 02-22-2010, 08:17 PM
Re: Husband?

My husband is so happy, all the problems that are gone!! We're only tied down because of my sickly 12 year old doggie. The only thing I need to work on is my chronic pelvic pain issues, but when I had my bleeding issues, We couldn't do anything. One time we tried to go out with friends & I bled through everything-- thank God their car had leather seats & I could clean it up.

It's such a blessing. I understand your hurt but there is such a great side to this.

Unread 02-22-2010, 08:28 PM
Re: Husband?

My husband is happy that I am doing this as well. He keeps saying he wants our life back. Cleaning house and taking care of the two wonderful children I have has been such a hard thing to do. He also is tired of being told no not tonight.

I understand the bleeding. I have had to grab one of my sons diapers while driving because the blood flow would not stop.

Thank you so much.
Unread 02-22-2010, 08:34 PM
Re: Husband?


I have those same thoughts. My biggest one is that in two years from now my husband is going to want another child and he is going to leave me. He says now he thinks it is the best thing but I feel he will change is mind.

It is sad to say that we need to tey our hardest to get passed it or it may hurt us.

I just never thought that I would have to ever go through this. I have had two wonderful births and have never had problems. Now I just feel like spoiled milk.
Unread 02-22-2010, 08:58 PM
Re: Husband?


You are NOT spoiled milk! You have how many children? 2? You have been blessed and you need to hold on to that. Give your hubby some time....he will be happier knowing he has you here with him, and healthy. My husband knew I couldn't have anymore children, (I have one, he has 3 from previous marriage), so he told me that he just wants his wife and our life together back. I'm looking forward to getting this done, not looking forward to the recovery, but looking forward to after recovery.
We are still women no matter what......and you are one beautiful lady who just needs to hear it. And you just heard it here.

Princess Hugs and love.......I'll let you know how it is on the other side.
Unread 02-22-2010, 09:21 PM
Re: Husband?

JLF7210 -

This is not an uncommon feeling, I won't say everyone feels it but many do.

You are in those pre-op nerves stages and afterwards you will probably experience the post-op tears because of the hormonal upheaval (even if you keep your ovaries your body experiences changes).

Take a deep breath and give yourself time.


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