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I'm so scared and confused! I'm so scared and confused!

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Unread 09-20-2011, 10:15 AM
I'm so scared and confused!

I don't know whether I should do this or not.

My doctor is recommending a hysterectomy for simple hyperplasia. I've also got several fibroids (like 7), but the largest is only 4cm. I do have an ovarian cyst on the left side. My periods have been irregular and painful for the past couple of years. Sometimes I even have two periods a month or I skip several months in a row.

I'm 45, married about two years, never had children and don't plan to have them. My husband had a vasectomy in his first marriage anyway, but with all my brothers and sisters and nieces and nephews, I've never really craved having children.

So I'm not worried about the childless regrets, but I'm worried about the physical complications of not having all my body parts, the sudden onset of menopause, and the loss of sex drive.

I'm just not sure if this surgery is necessary, but my doctor says that since I'm not planning to have children at the age of 45, and that since I'm already pre-menopausal, I should just go ahead and not take the chance of getting cancer later on.

But from what I've read there's only a 1% chance of simple hyperplasia becoming cancer. Should I not just take some progesterone and perhaps have a D&C or myomectomy? I had a myomectomy when I was 19. Fibroids are something I've always dealt with.

I'm scared. The surgery is scheduled for November 9th. I'm really afraid I'm going to regret this.
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Unread 09-20-2011, 10:23 AM
Re: I'm so scared and confused!

You can always opt for a second opinion before you make your decision. It might give you some peace. If you are still unsure, you are the only one who can decide whether you want to have surgery or wait.

I wasn't happy with the first gyno I saw, so requested a referral from my GP to another one (in a different area). You can call me paranoid, but I didn't want the two to know each other so their was no bias in the second opinion.

The doctor I found was wonderful and I trust her very much (I go for a TLH on Sept 29).

I am sending hugs and best wishes for you.
Unread 09-20-2011, 10:40 AM
Re: I'm so scared and confused!

I am also 45 and had never had any type of surgery except for a c-section I had with my daughter....I also had irregular periods and had a fibroid as big as a melon plus a uterus the size of a 4 month pregnancy....I was always in pain especially when I was on my period...plus I was always tired due to heavy flow....I was also scared about the after thoughts and I am now 5 weeks post-op TAH ovaries gone too and I feel a whole lot better...no more pain,periods,or tiredness...

as for the kids it seemed like you had already made that decision....but if day comes and you feel like you want one, remember there are a lot of kids who need homes....my sister also decided she never wanted kids and she loves being able to just pick up and go...

I was also afraid of the menopause and sex drive but being on the patch and taking other vitamins right along with that has helped a great deal... And sex drive is still there.....hope all goes well and I hope I helped at least a little...good luck and keep us posted
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Unread 09-20-2011, 10:57 AM
Re: I'm so scared and confused!

Hi there. I am 42 and just had a LAVH and removed BOTH of my ovaries. I had fibroids and 2 ovarian cysts. I personally felt that i'd rather give up my ovaries to have peace of mind. Fibroids are NO fun to deal with either, i feel better without it all. I am on a low dose estrogen patch that is keeping my menopause symptoms away...I don't feel like i'm in menopause at all. (knock on wood). My emotions are much much better without my ovaries and my Dr. assured me i would feel better after this surgery. Think about it and this place is wonderful for support and information.
Unread 09-20-2011, 11:30 AM
Re: I'm so scared and confused!

Thank you, all of you. Your quick responses are making me feel better. It seems like so much of what we read online are the negative reactions. It's good to see happy, balanced people.

I've called my doctor and left a voicemail for her that I have more questions and want to possibly consider a more conservative treatment. I do think I'll ask her if she minds me getting a second opinion. I really like my doctor. She's taken care of me for years. But she seems so eager to do the hysterectomy. I'm just not sure.
Unread 09-20-2011, 11:53 AM
Re: I'm so scared and confused!

My doctor seemed eager also, the more I read on here the more I noticed that most women felt rushed. I think the doctors know what will make us feel better, so they r eager to get it done and we as patients are overwhelmed. My doctor was very certain I'd feel better. It made me feel good knowing he was so confident tho. Good luck to you.
Unread 09-20-2011, 11:58 AM
Re: I'm so scared and confused!

Luvnpeace, that is a very good point. Makes a lot of sense. Thank you for saying that.
Unread 09-20-2011, 12:20 PM
I'm so scared and confused!

Originally Posted by Em11 View Post
Luvnpeace, that is a very good point. Makes a lot of sense. Thank you for saying that.
You're welcome! I understand how u feel, I felt the same way. Like I said, I'm 42 and am not going to have anymore children but it is still scary and I worried I'd wake up and look 80 or something. I was NOT ready for menopause!!! I just got married 2 years ago also. I thought about things and I decided I'd rather go thru menopause than have my risk of cancer increase. I also had fibroids, so I was dealing with all they have to offer...lol. Since I was done having kids my Dr said it made sense to do such a "radical" surgery...what's the point in trying to save my ovaries...considering that and my age, it made sense. It makes it easier to "clean" me out and get rid of my chances of cancer. I don't want u to feel rushed or pushed into anything, I'm only giving you MY reasoning and experience. It helped when I was in your shoes to talk to other women on here. Again, good luck!
Unread 09-20-2011, 12:42 PM
Re: I'm so scared and confused!

I too am facing lots of fears and doubts but at the same time I have such complete trust in my doctor( surgeon) I have uterine prolapse, cystocele and rectocele,I was told The best op for me was a LAVH,and further repairs as listed would be done also. My surgery is Nov 28, I haven't had a pre op meeting with Doc yet hopefully that will calm my fears I know I can't do nothing because I'm very uncomfortable now and the prolapse has gone from a 2 to 31/2 in only one month that was a month ago it has gotten worse since. Any helpful hints to help me before my surgery,I'm not one who likes to rest

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