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New here and blindsided by this New here and blindsided by this

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Unread 10-07-2011, 09:18 PM
New here and blindsided by this

Hi all you nice people -

I'm not even sure where to start. I'm 43 years old, married with no children, and this only started two days ago for me.

i came home from work Wednesday with the worst stomach pains ive ever had. At 6pm I hurt so bad I had my husband take me to the emergency room.

I was in the emergency room until around 3 am. blood work, then xrays and a cat scan and a sonigram. And lots of pain meds. Got shot up with morphine 3 times, that's how bad it hurt.

turns out i have two masses on or near my overies. they sent me yesterday morning to my GYN who then wanted to send me to a Oncolgist GYN in case there is any cancer. The GYN also did a different kind of blood test to determine cancer, we'll have those results monday or tuesday.

This morning I went to the Oncolgist GYN to talk about having surgery to have these masses removed. The regular gyn wants me to do the surgery with this oncolgist GYN in case they open me up and findany cancer which is possible even if the blood tests dont see it. Both of these doctors seem to be recommending a full hysterectomy if the
masses, or cysts, or whatever they are attached to my ovaries.

I was supposed to go to my stepdaughter's wedding on the 21st of this month up in NJ and then I was supposed to go to Jamaica at the end of this month to celebrate my 11th wedding anniversary.

Just this past Wednesday at 3pm i was at a little shop down the street buying 3 new outfits for jamaica. Now I'm crying my eyes out and looking at major surgery. amazing.

talk about being blindsided.
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Unread 10-07-2011, 10:00 PM
Re: New here and blindsided by this

SuedeBlue -

I am so sorry to hear that you have heard the "C" word. That is always so unexpected and scarey.

It may be hard to hear but I think it is very wise of your gyn to refer you to a gyn-oncologist just in case it does turn out that there is cancer. The good news is that you don't know for sure that it is, so for now try to take it one day at a time and don't get ahead of yourself on the cancer front.

You are looking at a major surgery so the crying over sudden, unexpected surgery is absolutely normal. It is all the more distressing when you have such big plans for this month.

You don't have a surgery date listed so I don't know if the Drs will wait until at least after the wedding or the trip. That may all depend on the results of the blood test. So take it one day at a time and try not to get ahead of yourself (easier said than done).

I will be sending vibes that there is no cancer but be aware if there is we have a wonderful Cancer Concerns forum where you can find very supportive and knowledgeable women.

we are hear for you.
Unread 10-07-2011, 11:34 PM
Re: New here and blindsided by this

I definitely agree with Tauruslady. Being sent to a gyn/onc is sooo smart. The first person to touch you needs to get it right. A gyn/onc is just the person, just in case.

If you are uncertain of your choices, you may want to get a
2nd opinion. Those drs always brought up things I never thought of.

Example: they said i ought to consider taking out my appendix just in case there is cancer. I always thought if an organ was in me, it ought to stay. My gut said to take it out so i did. They did find borderline cancer and that is one less organ to be concerned about.

It is also a good idea to get a 2nd opinion on the pathology. I am glad I did. You can probably ask your surgeon to have it sent out for a 2nd opinion.

Congrats on your stepdaughter's wedding to be and your anniversary. Ask the surgeon if it is ok to delay the surgery and listen very carefully.

Good luck! I hope it all turns out with good results.
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Unread 10-08-2011, 10:39 AM
Re: New here and blindsided by this

Tauruslady, you are right. They are waiting for the results of the bloodwork and then they'll decide if I can wait until after the 10/21 wedding to have this procedure. This is my husband's only daughter and his pride and joy and she would be devastated if something happened and he wasn't there to walk her down the aisle. I've already decided that if things should go bad I'm gonna insist he go to the wedding and I'll have friends here to help me through the surgery. I doubt he's go for that, but I can't be responsible for ruining my step-daughters wedding day. No way.

I don't really understand this bloodwork thing, cuz both doctors have told me that the results are about 50% accurate, which to me doesn't sound like they mean much. But what do I know? Three days ago all that was on my mind was this wedding and the Jamaica trip I've been planning for a year.

I don't think I mentioned in my original post that all 3 doctors I've seen (the one in the ER, the GYN and the Oncologist GYN) all said they don't THINK there's cancer. My husband is very encouraged by hearing all three doctors say this. I wish I could be as optimistic as him. I lost my Mom nine years ago to Melanoma (skin cancer) which doesn't sound like would be any connection to what I'm looking at, but it's still scary. I was pretty young to lose my mom and I still mourn her every day and oh boy I could sure use her now.

Thanks to both of you for responding to me so quickly, it's very much appreciated. Can't write more. Crying again.
Unread 10-08-2011, 11:00 AM
Re: New here and blindsided by this

That does sound encouraging. I agree that melanoma and the potential for this kind of cancer, there probably isn't a link. But cancer or any variety is a very scary thought. I hope you get good news and are able to attend the wedding, etc.
Unread 10-08-2011, 12:55 PM
Re: New here and blindsided by this


That is great that all Drs including the gyn-onc don't think it is cancer. They are probably doing a ca-125 and from what I understand there are other things besides cancer that can cause it to elevate. So that's why it isn't a 100% accurate test, especially if it is a 1x test.

I am sorry about your mother and you are right gyn cancers and skin cancers are different faces of the same beast. This whole thing is triggering all those memories and that is causing additional anxiety.

So for now try your hardest to focus on the fact that 3 Drs said they don't believe it is cancer. Try not to worry over what you don't know, you waste a good worry and it adds nothing positive to your day or life. Note, I am telling you to do things I find hard to do.

Continue to focus on your trip and the wedding and that you will get to enjoy both of them. Don't give up hope now you don't have all the details.

We are here to offer hugs and support in abundance.

Unread 10-08-2011, 01:16 PM
Re: New here and blindsided by this

I agree with everyone else. Take it one step at a time. I think having three docs says no cancer is good. Just keep focusing on that. Hopefully this will all work out and you will be able to go to the wedding. Sending tons of hugs and support
Unread 10-08-2011, 02:21 PM
Re: New here and blindsided by this

You guys are great. Thanks so much.

Yes, Taruslady, it was one of those 125 blood tests. I'm still hoping to go to the wedding. The other trip is def off though. We go every year for Halloween to Jamaica and meet up with 50+ friends and it's def a physical, active vacation. Not a sit on the beach and relax vacation. My husband keeps reminding me that if all goes well, we'll be there next Halloween, which I know. I'm sure I'm just focusing on how sad I am to miss this trip so my brain doesn't dwell on the bigger, scarier picture. I'm no Sigmund Freud, but I think I can figure that much out.

I'm focusing on those three doctors all saying they don't think it's cancer. I know that's a good thing. I know it is. I know it is. See how hard I'm trying?

I just finally got out of bed and washed my hair and my husband is washing the bedsheets. Just realized I'm acting sick when there's no need. I haven't been in any pain since I left the hospital early Thursday morning. It's a disgusting, rainy, dreary day here in Miami which I think is making me feel more down. Gonna listen to you guys and TRY to be a little more positive. Thanks to all of you who have taken the time to give me your kind words.
Unread 10-09-2011, 12:22 AM
Re: New here and blindsided by this

Hi SuedeBlue,

Yeh, that is good to focus on the good doctors and their hopeful opinions. I hope you make it to both places also.

Maybe your mom is watching over you and sent these good doctors to you.

I am missing my family too. I have to say I feel like my mother is sitting on my shoulder every day! (Very opinionated. I can almost hear her cheering me on when I help my son or ragging on me if I feel like giving me up).

It's good to focus on the positive and if you can't don't beat yourself up. Hang in there
Unread 10-09-2011, 05:55 AM
Re: New here and blindsided by this

I agree with Lucy. Do your best at staying positive and allow yourself those times of sadness, that is perfectly okay and natural.

Who knows the doctors may be okay with jamaica and it may be what you need as a support to be surrounded by friends.


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