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4 Weeks until my surgery, very scared 4 Weeks until my surgery, very scared

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  #1  
Unread 10-11-2011, 11:31 AM
4 Weeks until my surgery, very scared

Hi my name is Kelly and I am a 39 years old. I've always had problems, it started when I was 17 with a 60 pound ovarian cyst. Because I was so young they left a quarter of the ovary on my left side but removed the tube. Ever since then I've had problems with cysts and abnormal bleeding. I've had 6 laparoscopic surgeries and the last surgery I had, I had adhesions that latched on to my appendix and shifted everything to the right.

After that surgery everything was good for about 8 years. Now the constant bleeding has started and the pain is unbearable. I finally found a gyno that listened to me and took what I was saying seriously. I've always wanted to have children but I think the cyst when I was 17 sealed my fate. I've come to terms with not being able to carry a child. I have my good days and my bad. I'm tired of everyone telling me you can adopt. I know there are alot of children out there that need a good loving home and I'm ok with that, but I feel like I'm broken.

I'm ready to have this surgery... I have my days where I'm 100 % for it, then I have that doubt that comes in waves that says "are you sure you want to do this" "what if". I'm going in for my endometrosis biopsy on the 13th of this month and then I'm scheduling my surgery for November 14th, the day before my 40th birthday.

I don't know what it's like to live without pain, I've been in pain for so long. I'm afraid that after my surgery I'm not going to feel like a woman, that I'm not going to feel attractive or have a sex drive. I'm afraid that I'm going to be moody and miserable. I know this is all fear taking over. I know that having this surgery is going to be the best thing for me. I just need some guidance on what to expect so I don't freak out. I'm so glad I found this website, it's amazing!
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  #2  
Unread 10-11-2011, 02:04 PM
Re: 4 Weeks until my surgery, very scared

Hi Kelly,

I'm so sorry that you are having to go through this. I also wish I could punch out the people that keep telling you, "you can adopt". NOT FAIR!

That being said, I'm not quite sure what kind of hyst. you are having done. (unless I'm totally crazy and missed it)

I had a TVH done, with anterior repair and TVT. I am 41 years old. I kept my ovaries. I feel more of a woman now than I did before my surgery. More sexy, and my libido is through the roof. I have no pain and my energy is through the roof.

If you would like to read my surgery story, here is a link to it.

https://www.hystersisters.com/vb2/sho...d.php?t=450870

You are going to have some crazy days, very emotional, try to stay positive and it will all work out!!!

I wish you all the best!!!
  #3  
Unread 10-11-2011, 03:51 PM
Re: 4 Weeks until my surgery, very scared

hi kelly...

i feel the same way...i'm 36, waiting (very) impatiently for the doctor to call with my surgery date. i have been around kids my whole life and am devistated that i can't carry one myself...i'm not delusional, i know it's not perfect, but it was an experience i always expected to have...

when i started to tell people that i couldn't have kids, i got the same response...you and your husband can always adopt...i know they mean well...and i know there are plenty of children that need good homes...but right now it just feels like sloppy seconds to me...i don't think we could adopt anyhow...my health, not great...and my husband is 43 with some health issues also...

some days i'm ok, then there are times like last night when i start to think about the names i had picked out for my kids (daughters at least)...then i'm not ok...

i wish there was a quick fix to handle that part...i'm ok with the surgery part...not looking forward to it, but not super scared (yet)...i'll be thinking of you!

*hugs*
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  #4  
Unread 10-11-2011, 05:32 PM
Re: 4 Weeks until my surgery, very scared

Thank you so much policebound!! I will find out Thursday after my biopsy exactly what they're going to do, I know when I made the decision with my doctor I wanted to keep my ovaries and she told me that I would still have problems with the endometrosis. So I decided to have the Hysto and the oophorectomy. I'm not sure if I will be able to keep my cervix, I've always had abnormal paps. So I will discuss this with my doctor on Thursday. Also not sure what type of hysto it will be.

I'm so glad you are feeling 100% again. I hope I will feel the same!! Thank you so much for your support and I wish you the best of everything for your future!!
  #5  
Unread 10-11-2011, 05:36 PM
Re: 4 Weeks until my surgery, very scared

Forgive me if I double post. Still figuring things out on here
  #6  
Unread 10-11-2011, 05:48 PM
Re: 4 Weeks until my surgery, very scared

Thank you daisymazy!! I totally connect with what you're saying. I have my moments when someone at work is talking about their children and I just get overwhelmed with this sadness. I feel broken!
I like you have had all of my childrens names picked out, and I don't know if it's just me but do you seem to notice babies everywhere now. Commercials, people talking, the stores. It makes me angry that there are so many women out there that can have child after child and don't appreciate or take care of them. I get so angry!

I wish you all the luck in the world for your surgery... the waiting part is the hardest. Sometimes I think doctors just don't get the waiting. I've found that lavender helps alot! I have went out and bought lavender body wash, oil, shampoo and conditioner, and body lotion haha. It does calm your nerves.

Please stay in touch with me and keep me up to date with your surgery day. Hang in there honey... just know that when you have those feelings, you are not alone!

I think I'm more freaked out about the hospital stay then the actual surgery, I've always hated hospitals and I just want to hurry and get home, I think I will recover faster at home.
  #7  
Unread 10-11-2011, 05:53 PM
Re: 4 Weeks until my surgery, very scared

  Quote:
Originally Posted by Kelly M View Post
Hi my name is Kelly and I am a 39 years old. I've always had problems, it started when I was 17 with a 60 pound ovarian cyst. Because I was so young they left a quarter of the ovary on my left side but removed the tube. Ever since then I've had problems with cysts and abnormal bleeding. I've had 6 laparoscopic surgeries and the last surgery I had, I had adhesions that latched on to my appendix and shifted everything to the right.

After that surgery everything was good for about 8 years. Now the constant bleeding has started and the pain is unbearable. I finally found a gyno that listened to me and took what I was saying seriously. I've always wanted to have children but I think the cyst when I was 17 sealed my fate. I've come to terms with not being able to carry a child. I have my good days and my bad. I'm tired of everyone telling me you can adopt. I know there are alot of children out there that need a good loving home and I'm ok with that, but I feel like I'm broken.

I'm ready to have this surgery... I have my days where I'm 100 % for it, then I have that doubt that comes in waves that says "are you sure you want to do this" "what if". I'm going in for my endometrosis biopsy on the 13th of this month and then I'm scheduling my surgery for November 14th, the day before my 40th birthday.

I don't know what it's like to live without pain, I've been in pain for so long. I'm afraid that after my surgery I'm not going to feel like a woman, that I'm not going to feel attractive or have a sex drive. I'm afraid that I'm going to be moody and miserable. I know this is all fear taking over. I know that having this surgery is going to be the best thing for me. I just need some guidance on what to expect so I don't freak out. I'm so glad I found this website, it's amazing!
It's okay to feel a little scared I am the same way. I have had problems for about 20 years. Had fibroids removed 8 years ago and felt fine for awhile. Last September I woke during the night with sore stomach and pelvic and side pain. Went to see my primary care after a visit to the ER and was sent to and gynocologist. After about 3 different test I was prefered to an Gynecologic Oncology doctor. I was to have surgery for TAH/BSO on 11/7 but has been moved up to 10/27. I like you wonder what being pain and bleeding free will feel like. I understand your desire to have children and maybe their is away you can. I know this does not seem like much, but I am a strong beliver in faith. I remember how I felt when I had my miscarriage and it seemed like all my friends where caring their babies to term. Everywhere I looked I saw a pregnat lady. Keep the faith and don't stress over what people say. Never let anyone steal your joy. They may have good intentions, but right now you need strong moral support. I wish your the best and will keep you in my prayers. Keep the Faith when you lose faith you lose everything.
  #8  
Unread 10-11-2011, 06:45 PM
Re: 4 Weeks until my surgery, very scared

Hi Kelly,
I can totally relate to your fears and tears! Had a LSH in april. Scared stiff about the surgery and hospital I was strong minded and determined and that makes a difference. Went in at 6:30 and was home by 2:00. All went well and you will feel so much better each day as the bleeding no longer takes control of your life. Yes I still get mini periods because I have my cervix but not where I'm flowing like a river! The only disturbing issue is the darn swelling! Just when you have a good day you get hit with a few yucky swelly belly days......be patient, it will get better! It is definitely a life adjustment and there are days I feel like a misfit and cant fulfill a part of my life I always dreamed of having children and cry for days but we have to try to overcome the impossible and make the best of our new life. Yes people don't think because they have children and don't know the physical, yet mental factor we deal with and seems children are all around us to toy with our hearts. We have to put that aside and thank god we have wonderful husband to live happily ever after! Good luck on your surgery and let me know how things go.....remember positive attitude makes a difference!
  #9  
Unread 10-11-2011, 08:59 PM
Re: 4 Weeks until my surgery, very scared

thanks kelly...

you are a sweetie! yes, there are too many babies and growing bellies...my sister-in-law is pregnant with her second and i am dreading that meeting...i'm hoping to have my surgery in november, but my nephew is due then too...it's going to be difficult, but one day at a time and i'll get through it!

you stay strong too....please let us know how the biopesy goes...i think i had one of those....did your doctor tell you to take motrin or something before?? make sure to do it...i took it later than i should have and passed out! yup, i'm not always the brightest bulb!

*hugs*
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