0 support from dh <2 days to go | HysterSisters
HysterSisters Hysterectomy Support and Information
Advertising Info HysterSisters Hysterectomy Support Tutorial

Go Back   Hysterectomy HysterSisters > Hysterectomy Support Posts > Preparing for Hysterectomy (pre hysterectomy)

HysterSisters.com is a massive online community with over 475,000 members and over 5 million posts.

Our community is filled with women who have been through the Hysterectomy experience providing both advice and support from our active members and moderators.

HysterSisters.com is located at 111 Peter St, Toronto, Canada, M5V2H1 and is part of the VerticalScope network of websites.

With free registration, you can ask and answer questions in our HYSTERECTOMY forum community, get our FREE BOOKLET, access Hysterectomy Checkpoints and more.

You are not alone. The HysterSisters are here for you. Join us today!
join HysterSisters for hysterectomy resources and support

0 support from dh <2 days to go 0 support from dh <2 days to go

Thread Tools
Unread 11-07-2011, 08:01 PM
0 support from dh <2 days to go

Im having LAVH in less than 2 days and cant make my dh come to reality! He is all for me having surgery and feeling better but REFUSES to talk w me about! He wont listen to what the procedure includes ( only wants to tell me how it will be when its over!) Like he has ever went through it! He is either on another planet or glued to the tv! And get defensive 100% over everything! Im at my wits end my dr give me valium to cope with the panic feeling and told me to relax and get my blood pressure down(way down) and all dh wants to do is be insencetive n FIGHT! He wont listen to Anything! ! I need sone type of support i dont have close friends or family! No ones shouldar to cry on only all the house work and kids and packing my bag and EVERYTHING! ! What would you do!? Help!!!!
Sponsored Links
Unread 11-07-2011, 08:16 PM
Re: 0 support from dh >2 days to go

i'm so sorry...i'm in a similar situation...my husband doesn't want to really talk about this with me either...he actually feels i spend too much here...

all i can really say is that these women here are very supportive...they can provide a shoulder to cry on, as well as a wealth of information on just about anything!

good luck and know you are not alone.
Unread 11-07-2011, 08:20 PM
Re: 0 support from dh >2 days to go

Thank you that is a start! Im so glad i found this place today
Sponsored Links
Unread 11-07-2011, 08:43 PM
Re: 0 support from dh >2 days to go

Hounddog..so sorry you feel so alone...keep visiting this site for all your needs. I'm 22 days post op and am so grateful to have the sisters!! The sisters have big shoulders and will listen to you all day and all night..! Have you thought maybe possibly hubby seems insensitive to you because he's dealing with some of his own fears about your well being during and after surgery. From what you say, it sounds like he cares with talk about how after surgery things will be better for you..It is totally acceptable tho' for your need to be heard by your husband..and if you aren't getting that sympathetic ear you so deserve then try talking to your doctor to calm your fears as well as use the HS site!. You are right he won't "actually" go through it but he is with you in it and sounds like maybe he's trying to not add to YOUR stress about your operation by adding his worries to yours .. just my opinion. Best of Luck for your surgery! (Hugs) kjk
Unread 11-07-2011, 08:45 PM
Re: 0 support from dh >2 days to go

Since you only have a couple of days before surgery it would be worth it to take a little
time to get focused and then spend as much time as you can, reading this site. There is a search box for locating specific info. And i found the checkpoints tab to be very useful when I was getting stressed.
Unread 11-07-2011, 09:12 PM
Re: 0 support from dh >2 days to go

If your husband will read this, HisterSisters has a special place that provides information on hysterectomies for husbands. It is called mister hystersister. It will hopefully give him some idea what your are up against.

I do agree KJK that sometimes husbands can withdraw instead of dealing with their fears about the surgery. During the weeks leading up to my surgery, DH and I had some pretty wicked fights. I chalk it up to stress - he was just very concerned about me.

The women on HysterSisters are here to support you. Many have gone through what you are dealing with now. We will get you through this, both pre-op and post-op. Good luck with your upcoming surgery. We will be waiting for you on the other side...

Unread 11-07-2011, 09:18 PM
Re: 0 support from dh >2 days to go

I'm sorry to hear your hubby hasn't been very comforting. Mine at least took the time to sit down with me and talk about it, but I have to admit he doesn't want to talk about the details, and I'm sure he'll be sorry when it comes right down to it. I think I posted this in another thread, but I think we're just wired different. I want all the 411 up front so I can prepare for anything. He's more of a "roll with the punches" kind of guy. I told him about the mister Hystersisters website, and even put a link for it on his computer, but he hasn't mentioned if he's looked at it. He may be afraid and unsure of what to say, or he may just not understand that we girls are emotional about our health, especially our reproductive health. I hope he comes around quickly, but until then, you've got your Sisters here.
Best of luck to you!
Unread 11-08-2011, 02:23 PM
Re: 0 support from dh >2 days to go

Hey Hounddog,

My husband isn't very talkative about anything, but I've gotten used to that. He listens to me talk about it some, but has nothing much to say.

In the past few years we both have planned activities around my very irregular schedule and he's ready for that to come to and end, but the only concern he voiced was about sex post-op and I assured him the playground would be reopened after a few weeks - otherwise he's just glad that I'm going to feel better when all is said and done and that's what matters to him.

He thinks HS is a hoot - I've shared with him some of the 'Great Sex' post-op announcements and some of the funny stuff on here and knows I'm getting lots of information - a great deal of which he couldn't care less about.

Like KJK and marestail said, we are all wired different and handle our stress in different ways.

Good Luck tomorrow and wishing you a quick recovery

Unread 11-08-2011, 03:37 PM
Re: 0 support from dh >2 days to go

Good to have hyster sisters today
Unread 11-09-2011, 12:49 AM
Re: 0 support from dh >2 days to go

Good Morning Hounddog - and Good Luck.

Wishing you a flawless surgery and a speedy recovery. Keep us posted, I'm right behind you.

Our Free Booklet
What 350,000 Women Know About Hysterectomy: Information, helpful hints as you prepare and recover from hysterectomy.
Answers to your questions

Thread Tools

Forum Jump

Similar Threads
From This Forum From Other Forums
36 Replies, Last Reply 02-15-2011, Started By Chelsea1956
29 Replies, Last Reply 01-18-2011, Started By TriscuitWafer
12 Replies, Last Reply 12-11-2010, Started By Groovette
7 Replies, Last Reply 10-26-2009, Started By SweetSugarPlum
13 Replies, Last Reply 02-22-2009, Started By Sugar&Spice
7 Replies, Last Reply 08-19-2007, Started By ribyra732
63 Replies, Last Reply 08-29-2004, Started By Poo Bear
3 Replies, Last Reply 11-21-2002, Started By bsolina
11 Replies, Last Reply 05-20-2002, Started By KC35
7 Replies, Last Reply 05-07-2002, Started By svquinn
1 Reply, Last Reply 01-15-2002, Started By mortgageladi
16 Replies, Last Reply 04-30-2001, Started By CJB
11 Replies, Hysterectomy Recovery (post hysterectomy)
10 Replies, Hysterectomy Recovery (post hysterectomy)
15 Replies, Hysterectomy Recovery (post hysterectomy)
16 Replies, Hysterectomy Recovery (post hysterectomy)
6 Replies, Hysterectomy Recovery (post hysterectomy)
0 Reply, Hysterectomy Recovery (post hysterectomy)
8 Replies, Hysterectomy Recovery (post hysterectomy)
10 Replies, Hysterectomy Recovery (post hysterectomy)


Hysterectomy News

December 2,2020


HysterSisters Takes On Partner To Manage Continued Growth And Longevity
I have news that is wonderful and exciting! This week’s migration wasn’t a typical migration - from one set ... News Archive


Calendar - Hysterectomies - Birthdays

Request Information

I am a HysterSister


Featured Story - All Stories - Share Yours


Your Hysterectomy Date

CUSTOMIZE Your Browsing  

$vbulletin->featuredvideos is not an array!