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How to deal with the emotions?? (children mentioned) How to deal with the emotions?? (children mentioned)

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Unread 11-23-2011, 02:21 AM
Re: How to deal with the emotions?? (children mentioned)

(((LibraryCat))) I'm so sorry to hear of everything you went through. Reading all of you ladies' posts makes me teary eyed as well. I've reread all of these replies so many times I almost know them by heart. You ladies truly are amazing women!

Dolly.. I've blamed so much of my feelings on my emotions lately!! lol.. Whenever someone catches me crying and asks what's wrong I blame my hormones. I've tried explaining what really is wrong and they don't seem to "get it" so I resort to blaming the hormones. It works out alright for me.. for now. I have considered adoption, but it's an issue to work out with my husband. His feelings aren't the same as mine, it's going to take a lot of discussing I think. I've done some research here in my hometown but always seem to come up empty.
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Unread 11-23-2011, 02:23 PM
Re: How to deal with the emotions?? (children mentioned)

I'm sorry your husband isn't as open to the idea. I hope he soon sees that there is little difference in the way you would feel for your adoptive child and the way that you would feel for your biological children. I hope your pain eases and that you feel complete soon.
Unread 11-24-2011, 09:36 PM
Re: How to deal with the emotions?? (children mentioned)

I feel the same way!! I have one wonderful daughter but I have always felt that my family was not complete. Since my daughter was 2, she has been asking for a baby sister. She has even asked Santa & the Easter Bunny for a baby sister. Now I have a hysterectomy scheduled for Dec 13th & am so emotional about not only losing that ability but having to tell my daughter that she will not be able to have her baby sister. Everyone has been telling me that children are resilient and that time will heal our emotional wounds, but they just don't seem to understand.
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Unread 11-24-2011, 10:09 PM
Re: How to deal with the emotions?? (children mentioned)

The only people that understand are those going through it. I'm tired of people telling me "you weren't planning another child". How do they know what I was planning? And even if I knew I probably wouldn't have another I don't know what to do with my expectations of being happily married and having three children. Instead I have one (amazing) child who I've been raising entirely alone since he was two. People don't understand how it feels to have the option taken away, the choice. I miss my uterus, I miss my period, and I miss being fertile. This is the hardest thing I've gone through, and I've been through a few things. I've never been so incredibly sad. I hope we all find peace soon.
Unread 11-25-2011, 12:27 AM
Re: How to deal with the emotions?? (children mentioned)

I am so glad I came upon this message board. Your post about made me cry. I too, thought i was crazy and alone in my feelings. 4 years ago I was told/and had an ablasion for heavy bleeding. This crushed me. even though I already had 2 teenaged boys, I always held on to the hope of 1 more baby, maybe my girl. But when my ablasion happened, I felt depresses, cheated and very alone in my feelings. I now will be having a complete hysteroctmy in January, and am again having emotional issues, not sure why since I can not longer have children....but this is very hard. I am so happy to know that I am not alone in how I/we feel....
Unread 11-25-2011, 08:42 AM
Re: How to deal with the emotions?? (children mentioned)

I can only hope my husband comes around to the idea of adoption.. until then I'm going to have all the godchildren I can!! ((Bearwoman)) My children are between 4 and 9 years old.. and they don't seem to understand either. My oldest two are from a previous marriage and have a half brother. The issue is, even though they already have a brother, they don't get to see him. They're always telling me how they wish we could have a baby in the house and they wonder what it would be like to have a brother, etc. They sure don't understand why momma will never be pregnant again. But my children are more than open to the idea of adopting.

(((Sugarandspice))) I feel your pain so deeply. As I stated above, my oldest two are from a previous marriage. While my husband is satisfied with having one of his own, I knew he'd always hoped for two. And his mother is insane! She's the hardest person to be around right now because all I hear about is how I should've taken care of myself and I would be able to give her another grandchild. But what she doesn't seem to understand is there is nothing I could have done that would guarantee me being able to have another.

((((Jowens1873)))) I've been reading this board for a long time, since I first found out about an ablation being an option. But I've never posted til recently. I guess I just got to that point of sadness where I had no choice but to get it out. We're in the same place right now, emotional as can be for the exact same reasons but also relieved to know we're not alone in feeling the way we feel!

I wish you all the best with your procedures and I'm so glad we've all found each other.

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