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undecided about having my sweetie at hospital undecided about having my sweetie at hospital

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  #21  
Unread 01-04-2012, 05:58 AM
Re: undecided about having my sweetie at hospital

  Quote:
Originally Posted by AmandaJaynes View Post
I think your all so lucky to have the choice , I would love my boyfriend with me before and after but rules are rules but it makes me so sad and worried sick.
personally when I'll be waiting to go down for my op I wish my fella was with me take my mind off it abit but because he can't be there I'll be a bag of nerves.

Im really scared to go through this alone
That's sad. What rules say no?
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  #22  
Unread 01-04-2012, 06:25 AM
Re: undecided about having my sweetie at hospital

Amanada, I'm so sorry your not able to have a choice in the matter. boo!

Personally i have struggled back n forth. I started telling my adopted mom (not legally adopted, both parents passed and was removed asa teen, placed in bad home #2. As a adult this family is my family. Every holiday, family portrait, etc!) To just drop me off that day. Then i asked her to just.come in and once i was in pre op, she could go. Well now I'm at."please stay and help distract me pre op." In which everytime her response is "i will be there for you." Not sure that means she is no matter what i say hunkering down there. When i had my gallbladder out, she helped me get dressed and i went to her house. Oh, i refused a wheelchair ride out. It hurt to bend and i told the nurse "i am not sitting down, then standing to go to the chair, THEN sitting down in the car. You get one up and one down, that's it!" So she was almost on my heels with the wheelchair following me out. but next day they were all surprised to see me upstairs having coffee when they woke up. I know this seems more, well more. Since its also one night in the hospital. But I'm glad to have someone who loves me enough to put my pants on so i don't have to bend and be there. Maybe by Jan 29th i will be all about her there as much as possible! Though I'm still determined to go to my apartment after surgery. As much as i.appreciate them. I see no rest there. With a five yr old adopted child, and sibling foster kids, who all have obstacles. I love the kids too. But mom has arthritis and one there when he doesn't get his way, purposely tries to bend her fingers back. The others with sensory issues, i can see not purposely hurting me. Not to mention its hard to rest with all the noise. I thinkvmy mom is a bit hurt i don't want to come there post op, but she says she gets it, and would make the same choice in the same situation.

Tina
  #23  
Unread 01-06-2012, 12:57 PM
Re: undecided about having my sweetie at hospital

  Quote:
Originally Posted by Shelleybelley View Post
That's sad. What rules say no?
Its the hospitals where I live in Leicestershire they say if there was a fire they only have to get the ill people out and not all there relatives but when its visiting times there will be visiters there so I didn't see any problem but the staff nurse said NO so we have to deal with it, Im terrified to go in alone and not have anybody with me before hand or afterwards , Im having my op around 10am and have to wait til 2pm to see my boyfriend and thats only for a few hrs , can't wait til Im home after 4 days in hospital so he can look after me

Im having a TAH and Im counting down the days ....

Amanda xx
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  #24  
Unread 01-06-2012, 07:16 PM
Re: undecided about having my sweetie at hospital

  Quote:
Originally Posted by AmandaJaynes View Post
Its the hospitals where I live in Leicestershire they say if there was a fire they only have to get the ill people out and not all there relatives but when its visiting times there will be visiters there so I didn't see any problem but the staff nurse said NO so we have to deal with it, Im terrified to go in alone and not have anybody with me before hand or afterwards , Im having my op around 10am and have to wait til 2pm to see my boyfriend and thats only for a few hrs , can't wait til Im home after 4 days in hospital so he can look after me

Im having a TAH and Im counting down the days ....

Amanda xx
That's mad! I feel so bad for you! When is your surgery? I'm the 13th and also in countdown/panic mode!
  #25  
Unread 01-08-2012, 03:04 PM
Re: undecided about having my sweetie at hospital

  Quote:
Originally Posted by Shelleybelley View Post
That's mad! I feel so bad for you! When is your surgery? I'm the 13th and also in countdown/panic mode!
Hiya My operation is on 20th January and even though everything is ready at home and my hospital bag is packed my children have had there orders when Im in hospital there all at an age to help and cope on there own , James is 19, Luke is 18 and Nicolas is 12... I still feel like I have forgotton something but can't put my finger on it......

I think Im feeling like I have forgotton something because my boyfriend isn't going to be there holding my hand ..I keep crying Im so scared about this op Im worried about them controlling my pain with pain meds because of my other health problems but I know I could cope with everything if I had my DB next to me

But as I don't have a choice I have to smile and put my chin up and say everything will be ok... I don't want to worry my boyfriend anymore...

My boyfriend is terrified for me already you see when he was 15 yrs young his mum had a hysterectomy for cancer but sadly a week later she died so he is pulling his hair out.. we asked the nurses, doctors if he could stay even if it was just in the waiting room but they still said No he can phone whenever he wants too... they will wish they hadn't said that to him lol

Warm Gentle Hugs

Amanda xx
  #26  
Unread 01-08-2012, 03:28 PM
Re: undecided about having my sweetie at hospital

I would not have it any different than to have my loved ones close. It is comforting knowing that my loved ones would be close by. This is your decision and no one else's. So if there is not second guessing about him being there then go with it.
  #27  
Unread 01-09-2012, 02:28 AM
Re: undecided about having my sweetie at hospital

My husband was there before, during, and after surgery. I ended up being admitted for the night and wasn't released until the next afternoon. It was very comforting to me that he was there when I woke up. A familiar face to recognize when I was coming out of the anesthesia. He ended up spending the night in my room with me. They didn't have a cot; so he had to sleep in a recliner chair. It meant alot to me. I say if he is willing let him stay and after your surgery put him to work calling loved ones on how you are doing. Thats what I did!
  #28  
Unread 01-09-2012, 09:25 AM
Re: undecided about having my sweetie at hospital

I told my boyfriend he didn't have to stay with me, but he insisted. After surgery, I was taken to my room where he was waiting for me and immediately was given my pain pump button, could only be used every 6 minutes. The chair he was in was very uncomfortable, but he stayed anyway. To me, that showed exactly how much he loves me. All night he was beside me, even though I faded in and out quite a bit. It was nice knowing he was there for me even though I kept telling him to go home.
  #29  
Unread 01-09-2012, 09:39 AM
Re: undecided about having my sweetie at hospital

Amanda-that is a strange rule. It seems to me that except in the rare case where a visitor is very elderly, disabled, or young that they would actually be able to assist in removing their loved one rather than staff needing to do it for everyone. I'm sorry your BF can't be there.

Untothelease-You are so lucky to have found your family. You can't always choose your blood relatives but you can choose your family. They sound like wonderful people.
  #30  
Unread 01-09-2012, 01:20 PM
Re: undecided about having my sweetie at hospital

Even though the hospital has said No to him being there with me before my op, I feel like having him there with me anyway and if they tell him to go then he can sit in the cafe until visiting time at 2pm or go home and come back in again ..

I hate this stupid rule and Im so sad he wont be there when I wake up holding my hand Im going to feel so alone
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