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But it's MY DAY!!! But it's MY DAY!!!

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Unread 01-14-2012, 01:09 PM
Re: But it's MY DAY!!!

LOL!!! Thank you all so much!!! I don't even know where to begin with all the replies... you are all such an amazing bunch!

I've chilled out a LOT from last nights Hysterzilla breakdown. I was unfortunately at work, so the only place I had to vent was here. Sadly this issue caused the first and only fight the hubby and I have ever had in our 7 year relationship, (I know, weird we don't fight right?). It wasn't really a fight, just a "frustrated discussion" on how we're both stuck with this guy. We both had already set a time to kick him out by in March when it's not snowing and the weather isn't so cold. We've both had enough of him and his negativity months ago. I was amazed to see that my hubby was just as angry at him as I was. OK, maybe not as much as me but pretty darn close, lol.

So of course when we got home the cousin wasn't here, bar hopping again most likely, and didn't return till well after we were asleep. He was gone again first thing this morning and will probably do the same tomorrow, making it impossible to arrange anything with him until after his surgery Monday. He's not even answering my hubby's phone calls.

I've just come to the conclusion that I am having this surgery no matter what, and he's just going to have to deal with me being Queen B. My hubby will not allow him to park it on our couch and he will have to remain upstairs with no assistance. He has his own bathroom and big screen TV up there, and from what I understand his own mini bar and fridge. He's going to have to get up and down the stairs by himself if he needs anything and we will not help. Harsh, but this is our plan as a married couple. He needs to see that he is a nuisance and no longer welcome. Hopefully he'll have an epiphany and move out before we were planning on kicking him out.

Thanks again to EVERYONE!!! I was really freaking out last night and all your responses have been so amazing and helpful.

Hugs and Loves to you all!
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Unread 01-14-2012, 01:16 PM
Re: But it's MY DAY!!!

Pack his bags, put them outside. Change your locks. Call the police if he tries to get in.

If he has $$ to spend bar hopping, he has $$ to move out. It my sound mean, but this guy is totally taking advantage of you. It's time for him to grow a pair and be responsible.

I don't find it weird that you and your hubby don't fight. I've been married for almost 20 years and we don't fight. We have discussions. But we don't fight. We have a very healthy relationship. No topic is off limits. We just work it out.

Us girls are here if you need to vent.
Unread 01-14-2012, 01:46 PM
Re: But it's MY DAY!!!

Thanks Beth! I would totally do that, but I just don't want the drama at this point. I'll just be passive aggressive and he will feel my wrath if even a toe pokes it's head over the top of the stairs for the next two weeks, lol. Healthy way to deal with it... no. But I'll finally have an excuse to treat him the way I've been wanting to the last 4 months.

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Unread 01-14-2012, 04:07 PM
Re: But it's MY DAY!!!

Start charging him rent.. I bet he will have a new place to crash within a week.
Unread 01-14-2012, 04:10 PM
But it's MY DAY!!!

Originally Posted by Aviano0824 View Post
Start charging him rent.. I bet he will have a new place to crash within a week.
I second that idea!
Unread 01-14-2012, 05:39 PM
Re: But it's MY DAY!!!

Don't forget to bill the 4 months back rent - and remember to include his share of utilities. (Give him the first 2 gratis because that was the original understanding)
Unread 01-14-2012, 07:49 PM
Re: But it's MY DAY!!!

I'm glad you and your husband were able to talk the issue through and that you're keeping your surgery date. Best wishes for next week!
Unread 01-14-2012, 08:54 PM
Re: But it's MY DAY!!!

I am making the L on my forehead sign to the upstairs room stealer. Get out doofus!! Actually, if you could pin him down, he might surprise you and be cool about getting lost. Sometimes, people are truly clueless to their affect on others. I really did not want to say this, but a hysterectomy ABSOLUTELY trumps bone spur removal. His surgery is important but yours is IMPORTANT. He must have friends he could go to.... Good luck girlfriend. I'm glad you are not canceling. Keep us updated on your recovery.
Unread 01-14-2012, 09:35 PM
Re: But it's MY DAY!!!

So a quick update... My hubby talked to him tonight and he will be moving out on Feb 4th, not soon enough for me but at least there's a light at the end of the tunnel. He said that he has to have his surgery on Monday and he has no where else to stay. I guess it got pretty heated between them and so the cousin took off to go to a bar. Ugh, I can't stand people that drink all the time. I like an occasional glass of wine but this guy drinks almost every night.
I'm really glad my hubby will be awake when I get off work tonight so I don't have to face him alone when he comes home from being out drinking. (Good lord, I sound like such white trash right now, lol. I swear we are a respectable family!).
If I hadn't done so much with making the house comfey for myself and had more money I would totally go to a hotel. No... actually I would pay for HIM to stay at a hotel.
This is so not what I needed this weekend. I was in such a good place emotionally and mentally for this surgery and now all I can do is worry about all of this. I wanted to focus my energy positively on geting better, but I'm afraid it's going to mainly be used to keep me from going off on him. Guess it's his choice to be locked up with a hormonal nightmare.
Unread 01-14-2012, 11:32 PM
Re: But it's MY DAY!!!

Best thing of all is that your husband is on your side. He will be even more so after the surgery, after taking care of you AND the cousin (let's be real, who's gonna feed him ?) Just stand your ground and don't let go of the couch. And don't even think about postponing your surgery. We'll be here waiting for good news ! Good luck !

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