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A little frustrated with my family!!! A little frustrated with my family!!!

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Unread 02-18-2012, 03:58 PM
Re: A little frustrated with my family!!!

A cruise sounds wonderful!!!!
I totally understand, though. My kids are only 7 & 9 but they have helped on and off. My mom has been staying with us and helps for a day or so and then stops. Meals have been sent home from my co-workers so no one has to cook other than to warm it up. We have had plenty of leftovers for lunches. I know it is hard work for my mom since she is used to being alone in a 3 room condo but she is the one who wanted to come and help. She just gets mad when I do anything and then shuts herself in her room(today, she was so mad she has only had a few cookies to eat and then a huge glass of vodka/coke). I am about to give up being a daughter....
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Unread 02-18-2012, 03:59 PM
Re: A little frustrated with my family!!!

I am in the same boat here. I am only 10 days out of surgery, and I get no help except one of my friends that lives down the street. I ask and she comes. My sister and my MIL was suppose to help, but they are MIA now that I need them. It is frusterating and makes me feel unloved.
I ended up sweeping the floor and cleaning the cat box cuz my BF refused to help 3 nights ago, and I started bleeding and hurting pretty bad and had to stop. He said why did you do so much! ha if he would get off his butt and help, i would not have to be in such pain today. It still really hurts and my doctor refuses me any pain meds!
If I had to do this agin, I would have went to my ex-husbands house, because at least he cares about me!
I hope things get better for you, maybe if you have a family meeting when ur hubby is home, he can set the rules down and you will be able to suffer like that.
Unread 02-18-2012, 04:04 PM
Re: A little frustrated with my family!!!

Originally Posted by suziq55 View Post
He is right.
On the other hand, I would not be too hard on everyone.
3 weeks is a long time and the tendency is to "slack off."
I would pull out the paper plates, plastic cups, paper napkins, and plastic eating utensils.
I would let everything go, if I didn't feel well.
There would be no allowance, and no cooked dinners...etc.

See if they get the message.
This is a great idea! I will get the paper products and say the heck with cooking, if my BF or sister or MIL does not want to help like they said they would, I quit. Ramon noodles for all!
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Unread 02-18-2012, 04:44 PM
Re: A little frustrated with my family!!!

You have to take care of YOU.
The house is secondary.
Unread 02-18-2012, 06:27 PM
Re: A little frustrated with my family!!!

I am about 4.5 weeks into healing and I be **** some day my DH is understanding that I can't do this or that. But when its time to go to the grocery store he wants to hand me the cart.. no matter how many times i tell him I can't push anything yet. But then he gets 'angry' and over protective if I complain of any cramping. Just driving me crazy ..
Unread 02-19-2012, 04:45 AM
Re: A little frustrated with my family!!!

My husband has been doing all the housework and my kitchen is a complete disaster...but...I don't want to nag him (he's been SO great) and I know that I can't really do it on my own, so I've just had to turn that one over and know that eventually, my house WILL get back to normal and that you WON'T see me on the next episode of "Hoarders" or something!

Have a Fabulous time on your cruise!! So nice!!
Unread 02-19-2012, 07:29 AM
Re: A little frustrated with my family!!!

please rest and let your family deal w/ your housework.
i,too, had teenager that was great til 3rd week and he disappeared after i started moving around.DH got on to me about me doing too much(he works all the time),he said son should do more BUT if you start doing things your family/ friends do have a tendency to disappear.
i did so much around the 2 week mark by the evening i could barely walk thru house.be careful.
dr. seemed to think i wouldnt slow down and he was completely right.i had to find out everything the hard way MEANING UNNECCESSARY AND PROLONGED PAIN for many weeks to come.but now i only have slight pain twinges so its took me a long time to get better due to overdoing everything.but i am stubborn and thought i could handle everything
Unread 02-19-2012, 12:12 PM
Re: A little frustrated with my family!!!

Hi every one. DH had a talk with sons and MIL yesterday. He told them how they needed to still do what they were doing in week 1 and 2. So far so good. I think k they realized how sore I really am, I can hardly walk my lower back is killing me. No abdominal pain just back pain if its not better by Tuesday I'm going to call the doctor.
Unread 02-19-2012, 01:49 PM
Re: A little frustrated with my family!!!

I know what you mean I was in hospital for just over a weeks after my op with an infection and high temp so when I got home I was feeling very poorly but my son's who are 19,18 and 12 said they would help do what ever needed to be done.. It was short lived !!! I am 5 weeks post op and can't wait til I'm driving just so I can get out the house ..

Im really upset because I have had to do the washing up, washing clothes and go do the shopping because my son's will not help I have shouted til I'm blue in the face and to be honest it is so much easier to do things myself and rest later on If I didn't do it no one else would..

Then after I have done the jobs my sons say I would of done the washing up ect ... I could bloody scream..

They really don't understand how big this operation was and how I should be resting and not doing the house work ... I have my 6 week post op at my doctors next week Im going to keep my fingers crossed so I can drive ...

Today I got very upset because I had cooked a lovely roast dinner and all the boys did was eat there food and sit doing nothing and the washing up is still there and I know I will end up doing it tomorrow, I was wondering if I was feeling more upset than normal because of having no womb Im not sure all I know is I could sit and cry...

Thankyou for listerning to me moan

Hugs Amanda xx
Unread 02-19-2012, 02:01 PM
Re: A little frustrated with my family!!!

I am 16 days out and feeling pretty good considering. The last three days I've been running all over the place with husband in the hospital and somehow I ended up getting a new car...lol Today, I feel like absolute **** and my house is a mess. I did some laundry and straightening up, but my floors are a hot mess and dusting needs to be done. I told my husband I can't do it and he has to help, bottom line. FYI he had an anxiety attack and is fine (tends to be on the dramatic side).

It's weird how you feel great for a few days and then boom....you are just toast. I guess that means you're doing too much.

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