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A little offended A little offended

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Unread 04-30-2012, 12:14 PM
Re: A little offended

I have to admit; I had no idea how big of a surgery this was until I had one myself. Silly me, I thought I would only be off work for a week or two because I had it vaginally. Maybe your friend just doesn't know any better? Still though, one should think before saying something so uncaring to a friend.
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Unread 04-30-2012, 12:57 PM
Re: A little offended

It amazes me that people just think out uterus is a baby house, and if we don't need it for that it is no big deal to just remove it. Now, get a kidney removed ( even though we have 2 and only need 1) and people would act so different! The same goes with a man that would get his testicles removed. Does it hurt less if he had a prior vasectomy, NO! So glad we have our hystersisters.
Unread 04-30-2012, 01:12 PM
Re: A little offended

I'm 32 and work in a high stress job, so i get the "wow you'll be off during the nicest part of the year"......a friend said that the other day (about the 3rd person to say it), and i just said oh yeah i'll put a wind chime outside my bedroom window to remind myself how nice it is outside....lol
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Unread 04-30-2012, 01:16 PM
Re: A little offended

Hey, you can be outside! I'm on my back porch right now, enjoying this nice time of year. You can lie around with your feet up just as easily outside, if you've got the right chair. Actually, I'm loving this, because I can walk a bit out in the fresh air instead of being trapped in the house like I was after a January hysterectomy. My own four walls were making me a little nutty!

But seriously, do they think before they speak, or are they just stupid?
Unread 04-30-2012, 01:17 PM
Re: A little offended

Sorry that some of you are going through these feelings. You know, I never expect great things from anyone, therefore when it was time for my surgery, hardly anyone knew about it. This way I wouldn't get offended for any insulting comments or jesters nor listen to any stupidity that one could talk or ask about. Unless one has been there and done it....the rest cannot understand or except.
Also, the others can never relate to it. Just us here at Hystersisters can. No one will offend us here.
Unread 04-30-2012, 02:04 PM
Re: A little offended

Hey girls, so glad we could be here for one another! I am going back to work after rectocele repair in two days. I went back to work after my hysterectomy and another repair too soon and hurt so bad. This time I told myself "I am not going to go back to work hurting!!" I took the six weeks, what a smart decision. I feel so much better than I felt at just my four week follow-up. I work with a fairly large group of women and not one person has called to check on me. I once called a friend a couple of days after a surgery because I was down and the first words out of her mouth were "We are at Disney!"
One other tidbit, I had my husband read the article under the intimacy section about resuming sex, and he said "I totally get it now, your healing takes priority". Being prepared is key!! Good luck everyone!
Unread 04-30-2012, 02:18 PM
Re: A little offended

I know what you mean....DH's side of the family have asked me repeatedly how was I? They have called and sent cards, but my side of the family? Some of them have sent me Facebook messages but have they called? No...they have not....with the exception of my father, who made the trip up to stay the week with me, and a cousin. I have tried contacting a aunt but she seems to be repeatedly ignoring our calls. It seems people don't want to be associated with someone who has a hysterectomy....like it is contagious or something. Rolls eyes....Anyway....I feel that the hystersisters are part of my family.....and I am thankful for the support that I have received here.

Unread 04-30-2012, 02:30 PM
Re: A little offended

I am also 28 in the 19 th in fact what a birthday preSent? People are stupid I have some woman at work that say I am gonna feel less like a woman I tell them I am going to feel more t like a woman no periods or hurting ne more I will b able to do what I want when I want and I won't b out of breath ne more I have two children also I know its scary but its going to b great!
Unread 04-30-2012, 05:17 PM
Re: A little offended

This is truly when you find out who your real friends are. I was terribly disappointed with some people and pleasantly surprised by others. I don't know why women get all awkward and say stupid things. Can they not imagine how this feels? I was told I was lucky that I wouldn't have to worry about pregnancy scares or buy tampons anymore. I found that insulting. Birth control isn't difficult to master and I've been using it since I was 18. And I would love a surprise pregnancy, that certainly beats losing my uterus. She also told me I was lucky to get menopause over with quickly. I think these comments were well intended but she was completely uninformed. Then I was told I had until Friday to finish having my pity party. She gave me a time limit for grieving the loss of my uterus, my period and my fertility. It's been 9 months and I am working on letting these feelings go and forgive her.
Unread 04-30-2012, 08:54 PM
Re: A little offended

Thank you all for so much! I've gotta say I feel a little less alone. I just don't understand some people. I mean if the situations were reversed we would certainly be there for them! i mean I thought she was my friend and she knows that I don't have support from home. But I have shoulders to cry on here at hystersisters right? Thank you all!

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