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Unread 07-08-2012, 03:41 AM

I am only 1 week post LAVH w BSO. I am on this site reading about HRT and trying to find encouragement. I am starting to feel like I'm drowning in regret. My ovaries were healthy. My surgery was sudden and my Dr said that I should absolutely remove my ovaries as my mother died this past year of ovarian cancer. But mine were healthy...and now they are gone....and i am left with feeling like crap and attempting to balance hormones for the rest of my life???? Didn't know it was gonna be like this. I should have kept them. My uterus was prolapsed and I did need hyst cystcele and rectocele repair. But I didn't need my ovaries removed. Crying.
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Unread 07-08-2012, 07:01 AM
Re: regret

It's natural to have regrets about surgery. We make the best decision we can at the time and I think it's important to try to keep that in mind and make the best of the situation since there's no going back.

Hormone balancing can be challenging and it can take some time to get it right. Keep in mind when reading in the forums that it's normal for women to post when they are having problems and not so likely for them to post when all is well.

You may find it helpful to keep a symptom journal which can be a good way to see, over a period of time, if things are staying the same, getting worse or improving. Early recovery is a time of hormone fluctuations as your body depletes the hormones your ovaries made and adapts to hormone therapy. Give it at least several weeks before considering making any changes, because it does take time to reach optimal levels with the hormone therapy.

Best wishes as you continue to heal!

Unread 07-08-2012, 03:47 PM
Re: regret

Similar to you I visited this site to get info. I had an emergency TAH to remove an 18 cm growth. I have absolutely no regrets. I was amazed by the negative stories, confusion and self-pity I found on this site. My advice would be get a good doctor and advocate on your own behalf. Only you knows what feels right. If you need to change doctors then do it. It took me about 3 weeks post op to get my hormones balanced and another few for my abdominal incision to heal. I now run 5 - 7 km a day, 4 days a week. don't despair, life does get good again.
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Unread 07-08-2012, 04:04 PM
Re: regret

Interesting take...I found this site affirming, informative, and absolutely full of ideas that my Dr. alone didn't have. We do have to advocate for ourselves. Sometimes our Dr.s don't have time to keep up to snuff with all of the possibilities related to hormone replacement. Hormone replacement isn't a one size fits all. Thank goodness there are so many possibilities to accomodate all of our individual needs.
Unread 07-08-2012, 05:29 PM
Re: regret

Thanks Bethv7. Your reply is truly helpful. Thank you for taking the time. Looking forward to feeling good.
Unread 07-08-2012, 05:31 PM
Re: regret

Much as I wish I had kept my ovaries, I made the best choice I could and it's a done deal, so I usually try to not think on those lines. Once I actually decided I would try HRT, I felt better within days. There is a post op adjustment period but you could potentially hit on a good HRT for you without a lot of trial and error. It can take a bit to settle in, even with the right one, so don't give up too soon. I do know how painful regrets can be, but I think they and everything else are worse at hormonal low points. I remember hating everything, not sleeping, and I didn't realize those were hormonal problems like the hot flashes were. It's amazing that estrogen can make such a difference. Sometimes I still torture myself with "what ifs" but then I stop myself and try to put a better spin on it---it doesn't help me to second guess decisions I made at the time, all I can change now is my current thinking and situation. But it takes a while to get to that point, it's all still fresh for you. I hope you can start an HRT right for you, and feel better soon. We are here to help you through this stuff.
Unread 07-08-2012, 05:52 PM
Re: regret

You are very early in your recovery and it's completely normal to have regrets and what if's. I was post menopausal and also lost my mom three years ago to ovarian cancer and I still had times when I thought 'what have I done?'. I'm sure you thought this through and made the decision that you thought was best for you at the time. Talk to your doctor about HRT and find the plan that is best for you.

Take a deep breath and go forward. You will get through this and feel better, it just takes some time. As April Dawn said, it is common for women to post here when they are having problems, but you will also find lots of support and encouragement.

I have finally turned the corner and I feel great. I feel so relieved that I don't have the worry about ovarian cancer that I was living with. That gives me great peace of mind. Hang in there and take care of yourself. We are here for you.

Unread 07-08-2012, 09:04 PM
Re: regret


I chose to have my ovaries out along with my uterus because my mom died of ovarian cancer at 57. I don't regret it because ovarian cancer is very hard to detect and a lot of people die from it. I was close to menopause so it was not hard for me to decide. My doctor left it up to me.
I took HRT for 7 years after my hyst because my hot flashes were absolutely awful. I have been off for 3 years and I am not having any hot flashes. I sometimes get a warm flush once a day, but it is around 99 here in Texas and that is when I can get the problem in the summer, but otherwise just fine. I sleep good, my weight is good, and I exercise 4 to 5 times a week for 30min.

You may not have to be on them for the rest of your life. I know a couple of women who have successfully gotten off of the HRT in their 50's and 60's and are doing fine, so there may be a chance you may get off if you want to. I weaned off slowly for a couple of years and then just stopped it. My doctor said I could be on HRT as long as I needed it. I just one day decided to try to see how I would do and went from there. The reason I decided to get off was that risks of stroke and blood clots goes up with age.

The first several years the symptoms are the worst for most of us, so HRT is very helpful in the beginning. Having ovaries out is not the end of the world and we do the best we can and move forward taking care of our health, eating right and exercising . This is probably the most important time in our lives to take care of ourselves.

You will have to decide what is best for you and how bad your symptoms are and for how long. You can always take the lowest estrogen dose that will manage your symptoms.

Unread 07-10-2012, 03:06 PM
Re: regret

Originally Posted by bethv7 View Post
I was amazed by the negative stories, confusion and self-pity I found on this site.
Please keep in mind that the majority of women with good outcomes tend not to post so that can skew your interpretation towards the negative.

Ironwoman - You're 1 week post-op. Don't be so hard on yourself. Emotional recovery can take time as well. When the regret surfaces try to balance it with a positive, even if that positive is a small thing.
Unread 07-17-2012, 09:15 PM
Re: regret

Just wanted you to know I'm thinking of you and understand your feelings. I had to have a complete hyst. suddenly and was given only a few weeks to live if I didn't have it and guess what.....2 weeks after surgery I was regretting it! Yep, makes no sense but I was letting the what if's eat me alive for no reason. Kept thinking what if the Dr. was wrong and I didn't need the surgery etc! Acceptance of what we don't have control over can be tough but it has gotten easier with time! Just wanted you to know I understand your feelings and I am sorry you are having to deal with that! Chin up, it will get easier I promise!! You are not alone!

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