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Somebody get me a padded cell.... Somebody get me a padded cell....

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  #1  
Unread 01-20-2002, 10:50 AM
Somebody get me a padded cell....

Ok, ladies. I am having a TVH on Tuesday the 22nd. I am a COMPLETE basket case. I am so totally terrified of this whole idea. I have been having almost constant panic attacks. My blood pressure sky rockets, I can't stop crying and just thinking about this makes me literally throw up. I can't help feeling like this. I try but that only seems to make me that much worse off. I tell myself that I have to get a grip on this, but I can't seem to do it. I KNOW I need this surgery. I can't continue to live in this kind of pain, but then I think about it and wonder if the pain is all in my head...and that I really am crazy. i tell myself to get a grip and end up puking. I tell myself to get over it and I end up crying harder. WHY am I having such a hard time accepting the inevitable??? I'm 35, married with 2 boys. Don't want any more kids, so that is not a factor. What the heck is wrong with me??? Why can't I get a handle on this? I hang out in the chat room almost constantly. The ladies there nothing short of amazing. If it weren't for them this stupid idea of surgery would have been canceled long ago..and I probably would be out of a job due to time missed instead of on short term disability.
Well, I just had to rant a bit.
I'm going to go throw up again now.. probalby followed by another crying bout and temper tantrum.....
Michelle
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  #2  
Unread 01-20-2002, 11:02 AM
Somebody get me a padded cell....

Hi Raven~

I'm sorry you are having such a difficult time right now. I was in a total panic before my sugery too. It is a very scary thing! I had surgery on 1/7 and can honestly say...the waiting was truly the worse part. You will feel so much better when it is all behind you. I wonder if your doctor could order something for your nerves? Might be worth a phone call.

I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers.

!
  #3  
Unread 01-20-2002, 11:13 AM
I agree, call the dr.

I think you should call the dr. also and see of there is anything he can give to relax you a bit. I have been through alot of different surgeries over the years. Gernally im fine with each one until about 3 or 4 days before hand. But, this one is getting to me as well. My kids are 13,15 and 19 and I have a grand-daughter so Im not interested in any more children either. Those **** hormones. Do you have any support from family or friends that you could call today and spend some time with. My sister has been wonderful, she lives 2 hours away but we have been burning up the phone lines and the net!

Hang in there kiddo, I will say a prayer for you.

Tammie
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  #4  
Unread 01-20-2002, 11:18 AM
Somebody get me a padded cell....

Michelle..

Honey.. the darn waiting is almost over. Many of us are praying for you. You are just a few days away from all the worries going away.

Hey.. we love you hanging out in chat all the time. It has been great to get to know you. You are a strong willed and honest woman.

I am looking forward to the first time you say... hey... waiting was really the hardest part to a Lady in Waiting!

Hugs and Prayers of Strenght to you!

luckysister... aka HSChat TeamTraci
  #5  
Unread 01-20-2002, 11:40 AM
Somebody get me a padded cell....

Hi Raven-

I'm a fellow LIW. I've got another week to go and I guess the big panic hasn't hit me yet. I do feel tense tho and wish the waiting was over.

One thing that has helped me so much is sticking to my normal routine and focusing on my family. I have had 'bouts of nesting and am trying not to let the urge to go wild with cleaning & cooking totally obsess me. This course of action has helped a lot with my nerves. I have, however, had several crying jags. But from reading posts, all of this must be quite normal.

Do something special for yourself, get a massage, take a bubble bath and that may help to calm your nerves.

I wish you the best thru this waiting period and also wish you an uneventful surgery and recovery.

Take care-
  #6  
Unread 01-20-2002, 01:12 PM
Somebody get me a padded cell....

A lot of women here have gotten "something to take the edge off" from their doctors - might as well ask, it could help.

As for the pain being "in your head" - I've been hanging out here a while now, and I have yet to see a woman come back post-op and say "Gee, they took out the parts I thought were causing trouble, but I still have the same pains and troubles every month... hmmm, I must actually be imagining all my problems after all."

Don't be too hard on yourself. Maybe you just need to cry a bit. Go right ahead. When you feel up to it, spend some time thinking about the future. What have you always wanted to do, but haven't been able to? Camping? Taking a dance class? Volunteering at soup kitchens? Swimming at a friend's pool parties? Write down all the things you might like to do with your healthy new future, and visualize yourself enjoying these activities. It's normal to have some worry and dread about surgery - don't try to suppress that - just balance with some hope and optimism, which is equally valid and realistic.

Hang in there!
  #7  
Unread 01-20-2002, 02:46 PM
Somebody get me a padded cell....

Hi Michelle!!!

Look at how far you've come....I've only known you for about a month in chat and I am amazed at you and that you're almost here! All your feelings of anxiety and nervousness are soo normal.. we've all been there. I can't wait to hear you say, "the waiting is really the hardest!!!"

You have sooooo many sisters here that are praying for you and will be thinking of you on Tuesday... each of us holding your hand very tightly. I know that you're going to be a great Princess. Today and tomorrow will be the worst for you. And then when you wake up on Tuesday and go to the castle.. there will be so much going on around you that you will not have time to be nervous. It is a scarey thing, but so many of us have gone before you and are feeling better than ever now that we're princesses!!

I can't wait to hear from you upon your trip home.... and please know that I will be thinking and praying for you today, tomorrow and ALL DAY on Tuesday.

I am sending you huge s
  #8  
Unread 01-20-2002, 04:26 PM
RELAX!!!

Hi Michelle!

Trust me, it will all be o.k. As I mentioned in a previous post, yesterday marked my 1-year anniversary since my surgery. It amazes me how fast the time flew.

If it helps you, think of how you will be pain free! I can personally tell you that it is wonderful on the "other side". You know, like being here on earth and wondering what heaven is like...? Well, you're almost there and trust me, once you get here, you'll NEVER want to even think about what you were going through.

Life is wonderful...Post op, you'll begin to experience it at its fullest!

God bless,

Lisa
  #9  
Unread 01-20-2002, 04:48 PM
goin' looney with ya!

I totally relate to your panic feelings! I'm normally an anxious person (half my time I'm anxious, the other half depressed). We have a lot in common: I'm 36 and have two children also. Tubes tied a few years ago. Surgery not for six weeks. Having TAH plus the ovaries and all...

Other than dying in surgery, I'm afraid of Pain, Unrelenting Nausea and of not breathing and then blood transfusions (in that order).

My first c-section -- the problem was pain
My second c-section -- had horrible nausea and didn't breathe right for days; also needed a blood transfusion because I lost so much blood -- fainted everytime I stood up.
My third surgery was a gallbladder removal. Everything was okay there, except they wouldn't give me pain meds after the surgery because I wasn't breathing again... so they waited until I was literally screaming and begging for it (and breathing).
My fourth surgery was a hysteroscopy this fall. That went the best of all, except I woke up with a breathing tube in and freaked out.

So, I guess the message is, I made it through all of that -- why would this be any worse?
:eyes:
I was told to tell the Anesthesiologists that I'm worried about pain, nausea, bleeding and not breathing, and that they can then use the best meds for all that.

I'm also hoping that now that I weigh about 30 lbs less then my last year gallbladder operation, that the recovery will be better/easier (I am 60 lbs less than after the 2nd c-section).

But NO YOu are definitely NOT ALONE!!
I'm new on h ere, and already have found tons of comfort/support!

When is your surgery?
Let's keep in touch!!
  #10  
Unread 01-20-2002, 04:50 PM
Somebody get me a padded cell....

I "thought" I was totally ready for my surgery also. Was sick and tired of the pain, heavy bleeding, headaches, nausea, etc. So went in to see doc one week, was scheduled for surgery the next week. Well, for me didn't get here soon enough, but the waiting was horrible. I started worrying about the pain afterwards, the "swelly belly", you know silly stuff. I should have had it done that week. Well, I am here to tell you that everything went great. I'm doing exceptionally well so says my doc. Yes, I am being the "perfect" princess. Haven't done anything I'm not supposed to. Anyways, this sudden "calmness" came over me the day before my surgery. Oh I cried, I got scared, but found some dear friends that helped me through that. This site has been great also. I think most everyone worries to some point, think that is only natural. BUT, hang in there, and just think of how GOOD you will feel once it is over with and you have healed. That's one of the things that got me by.

My thoughts are with you,
Hugs
Snow
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