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Unread 02-22-2002, 08:59 AM
New to the site...hello

Hi, I am so happy I found this site, however I am leaving for a doc's appt in one hour to discuss my options. I am wondering if anyone else out there is like me...38 no children, I have already had an uterine embolization for fibroid in Nov. 99. It worked really well, or so I thought. They are back and now doctor wants to do a myomectomy. I have struggled with ovarian cysts, heavy bleeding, fibroids, infertiliy for 20 years. This is the part I am wondering about. I am actually requesting a hysterectomy. Since fertility was always a question and my poor health is getting in the way of a real life, I just want it over with.
Almost all the posts I read were from women who have children.
I was wondering if there is anyone around you requested a
hysterectomy and does not have children. I find so much conflicting reports on all the procedures. I hope I am making the right decision. Thank you to anyone who answers.
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Unread 02-22-2002, 09:29 AM
New to the site...hello

Hi Paly,

I too do not have children. (although I teach, so I actually have more than 100 every day )
I am 31 years old and have fibroids,cysts, extreme back and leg pain, and some endometriosis. I didn't actually request a hysterectomy, but I guess I kinda did. See, I told the doctor something had to be done. I'm in too much pain. Suffering does not make for a fullfilled life. The doctor and I discussed options and the best chance for being pain-free was to have a hysterectomy. I chose this option. I didn't make it right away. I have had a lap. done for a ruptured cyst, have been taking continuous birth control for over a year to control the size (and hopefully prevent more ruptures) of cysts, have tried not being on anything, and have tried to relieve pain with various prescription pain killers. The hysterectomy is my choice because nothing else helped as much as I had hoped and needed. I've been in extreme pain for the past 2 months and said now is the right time. I'm thrilled to be having a hysterectomy! I just told the doctor, at my pre-op consult a few hours ago, that I have no doubts about this decision. I actually can't wait to find out what my life will be like after.
Please, take all the time you need and check your options. You'll be happy you did. Make sure your doctor is willing to discuss all options and their pros and cons. You need someone who is focused on your issues.
Good Luck.

Unread 02-22-2002, 09:33 AM
No children either


I am 41 and, like you, have no children.

In fact, I always thought I couldn't get pregnant (by the fact that I had hardly been careful over the years), but was very surprised to find myself so in 1998 at the age of 38.

Regretfully, I was unable to carry due to my large fibroids that of course, got much bigger very quickly as a result of the hormone changes related to pregnancy (obviously shrunk some after I wasn't pregnant any more). I managed to about 8 weeks and then that choice was made for me.

Needless to say, it was doubtful if I would ever get pregnant again, and if I did, it was almost, if not completely, impossible that I would be able to carry full term - at least without some serious intervention that would be potentially dangerous all round.

Anyway, without getting into more details about my fertility situation, suffice it to say, I waited more than 2 more years before it became obvious that I couldn't put a hysterectomy off any longer. Although other options were available, like you I found reports on them conflicting - not to mention that many were just plain out of the question for me personally.

My final decision was made for me when my fibroids, which had been more or less pretty stable size wise for a while, decided to start growing yet again. Result being, naturally (no pun intended), that other organs (ie. a very squished bladder) were starting to be seriously impacted. That, plus the fact that my severely enlarged uterus decided to drop (as in prolapse) made the decision that much more timely.

Although my Dr. had been recommending hysterectomy for at least 2 years, I had managed to put it off and hoped that I could continue to do so for several years - if not forever.

Obviously, it came to the time that I couldn't put it off any longer, even though it meant positively, 100%, no way in heck, that I could ever have a child. But, then again, I'd pretty much resigned myself that that fact - at least 99% or so. And I wouldn't be surprised if you've done the same.

If so, your decision is made. As it should be for the sake of your health, and the chance for a happy and real life.

Sincere best wishes whatever you decide. And sorry for my rambling! I hope that I've helped at least a little wee bit in sharing my experience with you - as I'm sure others will theirs.
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Unread 02-22-2002, 09:45 AM
Thank you so much for answering

Thank you to both of you for answering. I will let everyone know what I decide on monday. I see my doc in just a little bit.
This site is so great. I am the only woman I know that is having these problems. I feel like every friend, aquaintance I have is having a baby in the next couple of months.
I know reproductive problems are very common but I am certainly the minority in my circle of friends and family.
This has made me feel not so "broken". Intellectually, I know all the correct things to tell myself, but emotionally it is another matter. I also struggle with either Lupus or Rheumatoid arthritis
(docs cannot seem to come up with a definitive answer on that one either)
Sometimes I cannot remember what it is like to be pain free.
Family and friends don't understand because I am a very positive person and try not to talk about my health all the time. So, I hide it very well. So, finding this site is a Godsend to me. Thank you
Than you, Thank you
Unread 02-22-2002, 09:49 AM
New to the site...hello

Hi, Paly. I'm 35, no kids, and I'm having a LAVH in March.

I never wanted kids. I hope my info is helpful anyway.

I decided 6 months ago that allowing my life to be limited by menstrual cramps had to stop. I'd tried lots of alternative and western medical solutions; nothing helped, or not enough to make me functional, much less pain-free, for those rough days. I'm just finishing up a 6-month course of acupuncture, without much success (helped a *lot* with other problems but not with cramps), and I promised myself if that didn't work, I'd get a hysterectomy. Ever since I started having bad cramps as a teenager, hysterectomy seemed like paradise -- and I thought I'd never get there.

While I'm scared of major surgery, I am thrilled to have the chance to have the pain END!! The idea of not having to consult a calendar and count days when making travel plans amazes me.

Someone else on this board said it's a quality of life issue. I totally agree. I found for myself that educating myself as much as possible really helped me make the decision. In the end, I went to my gynecologist and discussed various options (most of which I'd already tried), and then told her I wanted a hysterectomy. She agreed to do it.

It's an intensely personal decision, and of course there are risks. I'm hoping to find out if some of my other ailments (intestinal stuff) are related to menstrual problems thru endo or adeno, so for me, there are 2 good reasons to go through with it. For me, this has been a process of really taking charge of my life and my health. It sounds weird, but deciding to have the hyst is, for me, an act of self-love -- deciding it's this important to end my suffering. But it took me 20+ years of waffling and 6 months of deep, difficult emotional processing to get here. I hope it's easier for you!

Good luck figuring out what's best for you -- for me, that part was incredibly hard, listening to everyone around me, getting conflicting advice, etc. Finally I just had to listen to my heart. When it was ready, it told me it was time. That was just 3 days ago.

One thing I can tell you is that this board is a wonderful source of support. I hear so many of my thoughts echoed here. It helps me know I'm not alone, and for me, that makes all the difference.
Unread 02-22-2002, 10:10 AM
Well said!!

Very well said, LissaLee,

Most especially about the decision being an extremely personal one.

Each one of us struggles with different types of problems, issues and situations, but we're all united in our striving and hoping for a better, happier and healthier life. And that's how we help each other.

And, like you said, you know in your heart what is right for you. And that is what really and truly counts.

When the decision is finally made, whether sooner or later, its because its right for you. And doubts or regrets should never be allowed to enter.
Unread 02-22-2002, 10:19 AM
New to the site...hello

Sweet Cheeks,
How did your surgery go? Was it as painful (or not)as you thought it would be? I have had surgery also, amoung them a Laparotomy in 81 for cysts, etc. I guess I am thinking it will be about the same, since she will go in through the same incision.
Unread 02-22-2002, 10:39 AM
Good Question

Hiya Sharon,

The word I would use to describe my surgery is not painful. More discomfort than anything else. But, I had it abdominally, involving about an 8 inch incision, as opposed to lap which sounds like you'd be doing. And I also had everything out - uterus, cervix, tubes & ovaries, with some minor repairs. Don't know what you're looking at doing.

The closest I'd come to surgery was a hysteroscopy and D&C 2 years ago, and then a cone biopsy and lasering off of some moderate cervical dysplasia about a year later.

I gotta tell you that I was very, very, very naive in that I actually thought that when my Dr. told me 4-6 weeks recovery, I thought he meant TOTAL recovery. I was 15 weeks yesterday and still have a ways to go.

That's not to say that it doesn't get better and better every day, but I did not have a realistic picture of what recovery really meant in terms of tiredness, limitations in energy and stamina, physical limits you must place on yourself, etc., etc.

Regardless of how much I wished some days to turn back the clock, I have to be completely honest in telling you that this will ultimately have been the best decision I could have made for myself, my health and my life.

And wanting to turn back the clock had nothing to do with pain or bad results. Its just that I was incredibly active before my surgery (despite all of the 'female' problems) and incredibly spoiled in that I loved my life very much (except for all of the 'female' problems). But, I know that with a little more time, I'll be even better and happier than I ever, ever was.

Knowing that I'm past all of the more difficult or uncomfortable things, I can honestly say that not one single thing whatsoever about the whole procedure and process - healing or otherwise - was nearly as difficult as I had imagined it would be. And nothing was really that bad or that hard or that difficult.

Its more of a time thing which for me, is more of a patience thing, patience not being (by any stretch of the imagination) my strongest virture. Every single woman that I've either know personally or have read about on this site has said the a hysterectomy is the best thing they've ever done and wish they'd done it sooner. I haven't hit that point yet, but have every confidence that I will in the very near future.

I don't know if any of the above either answered your question or will be helpful. I hope it does. However, if you want to ask more specific questions, or want more details about anything whatsoever, please do not hesitate to contact me either via this site or more directly via my profile.
Unread 02-22-2002, 10:40 AM
New to the site...hello

I also have no kids. I'm having a TAH on 3/11 and have no regrets at all. After having extended periods and severe cramping for the last 5 years it will be such a relief. I have large fibroids and cysts on my ovaries. Had a lap done last summer cysts were removed fibroid was too large and now the cysts are back.


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