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No Sexual Desire/it's a chore No Sexual Desire/it's a chore

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Unread 03-01-2002, 11:51 PM
No Sexual Desire/it's a chore

Hi, I am going to be having a total hysterectomy soon. I have no sexual desire now as it is and after doing some research I have found that that is also a big problem after surgery. I'm really scared about this fact because it has become such a problem for DH already. I just don't know what to do about it. The sex is great when I give in and oblige him, but the desire is 0. I can't afford for it to get any worse. I have also read that orgasm isn't as strong. Can't win for losing looks like. Can anyone give me any info. The problem has been going on for years. I am almost 40 and I could actually live without sex. The only time I feel an urge is when I'm on my period and it's out of the question then, I definitely wouldn't do it then. What could be the problem? I have had my thyroid checked but it was ok. I have a wonderful husband and I don't want him to feel I don't want him. It's not that, It just seems to be such a chore. Just no desire whatsoever. I have been to several dr's and they never give me a straight answer and have never even tried to offer any help. Thanks ,,,, Mikki It causes us a lot of
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Unread 03-02-2002, 02:45 AM
Mikki Jo

Hugs and Hi there!
Well i think that you are in the same boat as alot of us. Before my Hyst last Sep I felt exactly like you, no sex drive and sex was rare. I had a very bad prolapse and severe Endeo so sex was uncomfortable and painful not to mention that afterward i would have severe backache and feel terrible. Alot of sisters i think would have felt the same way before our Hysts because of so many reasons.
I had my Hyst in Sep last year and honey I can honestly say that it was the best thing that I have ever done. My sex life now is wonderful and may I say (blushing) far more frequent than it has been for years. No pain or backache and as for the big O, well for me it is just as intense as before.
Once you have your Hyst and recovery is over you will feel a whole lot better. i presume that they are taking your ovaries, which means that you will be on some sort of HRT. Please tell your DR of your lack of libido, and he/she will hopefully adjust the HRT to help. Good luck with your surgery and please keep us posted. There will be light at the end of the tunnel. Hugs Vicki
Unread 03-02-2002, 06:39 AM
No Sexual Desire/it's a chore


I was in the same boat as you before surgery, partly due to the pain. I had no interest at all, but as you said when I did give in it was great. I am 39, will be 40 this month and since the surgery my sex drive is GREAT. I feel like a teenager again and I am on hrt. Please try to remember that most of the posts are by woman having problems. It is unfortunate but when everything is going great we often don't think to post about it. Keep the faith and best wishes to you.
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Unread 03-02-2002, 05:45 PM
No Sexual Desire/it's a chore

Many of us had low to non-existent sex drives prior to surgery due to the various problems we were having. In my case, it was severe endo that caused painful sex, lots of pelvic pain, bloating, gas ... you get the idea. Not a recipe for great sex!

I'm three months post op from a TAH/BSO and feel so good physically that my sex drive is coming back. And this is with no ovaries and no estrogen until about a week ago when I started low dose estrogen. While some ladies may have problems post hyst, I think more ladies report that things are as good if not better now that their pain/problems are gone. Please try to think positive about this. Thoughts create reality ... so think about how good you will feel a few weeks after surgery.

If your libido still isn't what you had hoped, you may want to talk to your gyn about testosterone ... some ladies report that taking very small doses really improves their sex drive.

Hang in there, Mikki. There is life after a hyst and it is good!

Unread 03-03-2002, 07:13 AM
No Sexual Desire/it's a chore

i am 33 and had am 12 days post-op.My consultant advised me to keep my cervix as this can help with sexual problems.I have had no sex drive since having my 3rd son who is now 3.She said that research is proving how important a cervix(if healthy) can be if suffering from sexual problems after surgery.
I like you are hoping my sexual problems will cease by the time i resume bedroom activities.
best wishes
Unread 03-03-2002, 07:35 AM
No Sexual Desire/it's a chore

I'm 38 and just wanted to be another one to add that sex is still great or even better after a hyst.

I still have my ovaries, so no hrt. Mikki, you didn't say if you are keeping yours or not. If you have them removed and still have no libido, you may want to discuss this with your dr. I've heard some ladies report that after getting adjusted to the right hrt, the libido returned.

I did have to have my cervix removed because of the recurring dysplasia, but have noticed no problems there. And my orgasms are still just as intense as before.

I don't know if you're taking one or not, but some antidepressants can cause a decrease in libido. Just thought I'd mention this in case you take one. If so, talk to your dr about it. You could maybe be changed to a different one without this side effect.

One major cause I've had in the past for a low sex drive was due to being so wrapped up in the busy-ness of everyday life & caring for the kids. I finally decided one day that I need to enjoy life more and took a good look at my good looking dh. I don't know what came over me to bring that on, but the life in the bedroom sure did improve!!!

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