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A little hope for the newest sisters A little hope for the newest sisters

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Unread 03-07-2002, 10:26 AM
A little hope for the newest sisters

Hi everyone,
I haven't been here in a long while but I wanted to give those who are begginig their journey through this scary land a little bit of encouragment by sharing my story. I am 30 years old, a single mother of two ( a 10 year old boy and a two year old girl) almost a year ago to the day I was diagnosed with cervical cancer. Just a couple week past my daughter's 1st birthday. I was so devastated! I had had both of my children by myself and had always wanted to do it the right way, with a man by my side. I knew that now I would never have what I thought to be a real family. I had a radical hysterectomy on march 20, 2001. they took everything including my ovaries and pelvic lymph nodes because my cancer had worked it's was at least 50% of the way through my cervix towards my uterus. I had to have six weeks of external radiation and chemo then just to top off they gave me internal radiation. So here I am thinking that I will never be the same. I thought that no man would want me because I was what I thought to be damaged or incomplete. And I thought that sex would never feel good like iit did before. So I went through my treatments with no major sideffects or complications ( now I can say that but at the time I thought that I was having alot). It is almost my 1 year anniversary and I am feeling so good! I have a feeling now that I can accomplish anything. I am taking hrp(estrace 2mg per day) and I don't feel any different than I used to. Everyone says I look better than I ever have ( I have actually lost 25lbs for some unknown reason? I think I just pay more attention to what I am putting into my body now),It's not even just the weight thing, I have a healthy glow about me everyday But I just seem to have a renewed confidence----like "Now that I have been through this and survived, nothing can pull me back or bring me down." I am begining a new better and job tomarrow to help pay for the new and better SUV I bought a couple of months ago. I have come so far since my cancer diagnosis. I really beleive that this whole experience has changed me for the better. I know that there are easier ways to self discovery, but if you have to go through something so hard and scary and beyond your control, take the lessons from it and that way you can never say that it was a totally negative experience. I truly understand that when you are going through a scary situation, you can never clearly see the positives in it but they are hiding in their somewhere. If you can get through it and look back you can clearly see them. Little things are unimportant now. I have so much more patience (which has helped me considering I work in a high volume call center and I don't deal with the most pleasant, friendly people in the world!). And I just seem to enjoy EVERYTHING more than I used to. Even the mundane everyday tasks. I have found someone I truly love, and I truly love his two kids too! We like to call ourselves "the bratty bunch"! because now we have four kids, they are not mine or his, they are OURS! and now I have four kids and a renewed love for life. What could be better? I truly have my REAL family. And even though every single day I think about the cancer and wether it will come back ( i can't lie it is still scary to think about it) but it is not consuming. I am going back to school to study life sciences and further my carreer in the biotech field. Anyways the moral to my whole long story is that attitude is everything while you are going through this scary time. And it will change your life for ever.....but it is up to you wether its for the better or the worse.....i chose the better. You have already started leaning twords the better by being here and venting and talking things through. Don't hold it in, it will consume you if you do. Cry and scream and talk talk talk even to those who don't fully understand......it does help.

email me @ [email protected]
...i'm always here to help and encourage

{{{{{{{{HUGE HUGS}}}}}}}}}} AND GOD BLESS YOU ALL!!!!!


Love you all and much thanks to those who help me get through the tough times..... Hope I can do the same for those who needs an understanding shoulder!
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Unread 03-07-2002, 11:13 AM
A little hope for the newest sisters



Unread 03-07-2002, 11:55 AM
A little hope for the newest sisters

Brenda , its so great to hear from you. I have been wondering how you are doing......... and its good to hear you are doing so well. Thanks so much for letting us know.

- for those that are fairly new to this board Brenda, Valentina and myself went through radiation together along with ZoeEllen another member .

Brenda , we miss you but it is great that you have 'moved on' from the cancer boards and your life is going well.

For you Brenda , I wish a life of good health and happiness. much love always x x
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Unread 03-07-2002, 02:42 PM
A little hope for the newest sisters

WOW Brenda.....
How inspiring to read your post. Just beautiful. Your post is just so uplifitng, you should be a cheerleader of some sort.
My surgery was March 12th, and especially at this time of year, it is all coming back to me, I find your post such an inspiration.
So now if I feel myself getting down, I will think of you......whether new or old, you have helped us all!!!!
Unread 03-07-2002, 06:40 PM
A little hope for the newest sisters

Hi Brenda
I remember reading your postings back in the days when I just lurked here. It was right before my own diagnosis of ovarian cancer. You were an inspiration to me. I was thrilled to read how well your life is going. Thanks for the update. CONGRATS!!!! karenann ovca
Unread 03-07-2002, 08:33 PM
A little hope for the newest sisters


I can't tell you how happy reading your post made me. I'm so happy you are doing so well and are so happy you can just feel it jumping off the screen.

And, may I say, I agree wholeheartedly with everything you said. Everything all of us have been through has changed us and I agree, for the better! Lifes just too precious to waste so much energy on the negative stuff.

on, my friend!!!



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