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Getting Scared Getting Scared

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Unread 03-11-2002, 11:34 AM
Getting Scared

Hi ladies!

My surgery is scheduled for March 21st. Only 10 days away.
I have been reading a lot on this site for about that last week or so. But even though it is helpful and reassuring, with each passing day I'm becoming more scared and I don't know even exactly what I'm scared of. I think it's a combination of things. I'm the caretaker of my family and being an invalid for several weeks is scary. Having to depend on my husband to take care of everything is scary. I know it's only fair that he should have to do it once in awhile, but it's not something that happens often. Also, I'm afraid that the doctors will find something worse than just my fibroids once they open me up. It's hard to believe that I can feel as bad and tired as I do all of the time just from my hormones being out of whack. I also have to go through the surgery alone, because my husband will have to stay home and take care of the kids. I have no family here and all of my friends will be working. The thought of going in at 5:30 and sitting there being scared to death, all by myself, for two hours is making me nervous. Enough rambling. I am trying to stay positive because everyone I know that has had this done has said I will be so grateful when it is over. I guess I just needed to vent to someone who knew where I was coming from....because my husband certainly doesn't. Thanks for listening!

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Unread 03-11-2002, 11:52 AM
Getting Scared

Hi . My surgery is scheduled for 3-18 and I understand what you are saying. My husband doesn't " understand " either. This site has given me the support I wasn't getting from him. I have felt the same way you are feeling, but I don't feel I am alone any more due to this wonderful site and sisters being there for me.
I am extremely tired also and haven't started any of the pre hospital cleaning that I have read other sisters doing, I just haven't felt like it , but I am not going to worry about it because I figure it will be here when I do feel like it.
My advice to you is to stay in contact with this site , ask questions, and tell yourself that you are not alone in this , there are many sisters , including myself , who are there for you.
I'll keep you in my prayers.
Unread 03-11-2002, 11:59 AM
Getting Scared

Hey getting scared !
You're not the only one who's scared. My surgery is on 3-29, Good Friday hah! I am soo scared that I threw up last night. I am soo scared to leave my dog in my husband's care that I'm paying $200.00 to have her boarded. I am soo scared my job won't be there when I get back( buisness is bad in electronic manufacturing) I am soo scared of doing an emema- that hole is ment for stuff to come out of, not in. I am soo scared that my house will become so nasty in my husband's care that I'll rip my stitches out to clean it up. Just remember, you may be alone in the prep area, but we're all here. If I lived in Washington state, I'd come hold your hand and mop your floors for you when you get home. The point is we're all scared, and the first step is admitting it. Don't think of being all alone. Would you really want your hubby there trying to keep you calm AND your children that would be more frightened if they were with you. Maybe there is a sister in your area that will come hold your hand. If not, you won't have to wait long until they give you the infamous," I don't care shot." You wouldn't know if anyone was there or not. If not go through the"I am soo scared" sayings with the person next to you. Who knows, you might ease someone else's pain and cause yourself a reason the smile. Good Luck!
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Unread 03-11-2002, 12:13 PM
Getting Scared

Hi Tammy and all you other scared ladies,

It's okay to be scared but its better to try to develop a sense of humor about things and hope for the best! Your mental outlook will make all the difference in the world. I had so many things go wrong with surgery and recovery, but all kinds of surprises also occurred. I found out my husband CAN cook, my kids can fend for themselves, I can ignore dirt and dirty dishes in my kitchen. Help appears unexpectedly. My daughter who always cries about everything climbed in bed with me at the hospital and held me tight when I was crying. It was so sweet and unexpected I started laughing while she handed me tissues. Its a good time to find out you are loved. The nurses all seemed to understand in spite of how busy they were, that you need a lot of TLC.

Besides, you have all of us, the sisters who know how tough this is, praying and hoping for the best for you all.

God bless!!!
Unread 03-11-2002, 12:20 PM
Getting Scared

Thank you ladies for your understanding and support. I guess it's natural to be scared a little. And, like I said, I am trying to stay fact, when I bought my last box of tampons the other day, I had a little private celebration in my head!!!!!

Thanks again and take care!

Unread 03-11-2002, 12:27 PM
Getting Scared

Hey girlies~It's okay to be scared, you wouldn't be human if you weren't!

The waiting is the worst part, trust me. s to all of you!

Unread 03-11-2002, 12:40 PM
Getting Scared

Tammy, I am going alone too. DH will be home with our children as well. I have no friends and no family to help us and I don't like throwing all my responsibilities at DH who says he really doesn't mind doing it at all but I'm not so sure. I am stressed and he is stressed and the kids are feeling it so they are acting out. It has been a rough few weeks in our home. Hopefully, it will be mostly over in a few days (I am scheduled for 3/13). The only good thing in all this is that I have found great support here. It also helps to know I am not going through this alone, that all of us here are pretty much in the same boat in one way or another.

TAH/BSO 3/13
Unread 03-11-2002, 01:11 PM
Getting Scared

If you have any family that can come help out please get them to come. My father drove from out of state to stay with the kids so my husband could be there to talk with the dr and visit me after surgery. You will be in the hospital for a couple days or more and this is major surgery. The dr. will need to discuss with a family member in person how the surgery went. One on here went alone and the first question they asked her was where was her family. The kids probably won't be allowed to visit you so you really need to get someone's help even if it means having the person stay in the waiting room while your hubby visits you. It can get very lonely by yourself. It can be a very emotional experience and you need to have the support of your husband. This is the time to except help from others. It's worth it to get someone to stay and watch the kids. Another idea on surgery day is to bring someone else along to the hospital (I had a friend come to meet hubby so he could talk to the dr after surgery while she kept an eye on my 2 yr. old in the waiting room). They will not allow the kids in recovery. Although my hubby managed to sneek the 2 year old in prep area to say goodbye to me before they took me to surgery. The two older kids stayed at home with my father. You need to rest and rest after you are home. I stayed in bed for the first two weeks and hubby fed, bathed, clothed the kids the whole time. You only have once chance to heal right so don't overdo it. Let yourself be pampered.

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