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Funny Patty isn't feeling so funny! Funny Patty isn't feeling so funny!

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Unread 06-28-2000, 05:16 PM
Funny Patty isn't feeling so funny!

Here's the Patty Report (Oh gee, these complaints probably sound like a man!)

We had a computer problem for the last couple of days that prevented me from getting online. This was probably caused by either my husband's tinkering or my computer genius 17 year old son.

On Sunday, I received word that a dear friend was killed in an car accident. She was such a dear and talented lady. Another driver crossed a median and hit her head on. It has been a bitter sweet time because of her death, many of us who knew her have been in touch and renewed our friendships which has been heartwarming.

On Monday, I learned that another friend was dealing with breast cancer. That was the same day that I sat in the dentist's chair for 3 hours getting a crown preparation.

On Tuesday, I found out that my 25 year old daughter's "boyfriend" is coming from San Diego for a visit and that they are thinking of getting married next year. This is a 56 year old recovering alcoholic that has already been married twice. He flies her out there once a month. She is completing (I HOPE!) her 4 year veterinary tech program at Purdue. One reason he is coming here is to meet my parents.

Today, the good news is that the computer is working. I was late for my dental cleaning today, so I didn't get breakfast and when I got home I returned a phone call to my parents.

The bad news is that my homosexual brother (visiting from Oregon) will not be part of this family get together for my daughter's boyfriend to meet the family because he feels that the church we belong to discriminates against homosexuals, therefore, he assumes that I do too. And he hates me for it! He severed our relationship 2 years ago WITHOUT EVEN TELLING ME! I don't have any bad feelings toward him or any "group" but he hasn't taken the time to talk to me about it.

My mom and I were discussing how to resolve the problem when all of a sudden we discovered that my 86 year old father with senile dementia was listening on the phone. He got very angry and hung up while muttering something!

My daughter has a miniature dachshund whom I am dog sitting (along with her cat and her bird) and during all of that, I forgot to watch him carefully. He went through the house and ate all of the "delicacies" from all of the cat litter boxes. He then came down to the office and was sitting in a chair when all of a sudden he barfed everything up, plus he had made a mess in the recreation room. (I need a barf smiley here.) That was a TERRIBLE mess to clean up. He needs a bath and a good toothbrushing. You know as a mother of 4 children, I have seen it all, so I mean it when I say, this was bad! If I had morning sickness, I couldn't have done it!

All of this has happened and look at the time! I haven't had breakfast or lunch! (That dog thing kind of killed my appetite.)

Outrageous Patty is thinking about going out to eat! Wait, I have a better idea: I think I will go get something to eat, take a sleeping pill, and then eat so that I will be asleep about the time I finish eating! The problem with that is that I won't remember having dessert. I can't win!

Maybe I'll get lucky and have a delayed orgasm from about 2 months ago! (For those who haven't read that post, you might enjoy it. If you don't have a sense of humor, do not read it!)

Whoa! I just realilzed that a significant part of these things were caused by :evil: men: computer problems, brother, father, 56 year old boy friend, male dog....

If any of you have any solutions to these and other situations I might get into, let me know!

I am so thankful for my girlfriends and my Hyster Sisters!

By tomorrow, I will try to post something HILARIOUS! In the meantime...I'll keep my chins up!
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Unread 06-28-2000, 05:43 PM
Funny Patty isn't feeling so funny!

Yeah, get rid of the men!!!!!!! hahahahahahaha
Sounds like a real crappy week. And you are still trying to find the humor in it! I think I,m sending you some happy, humorous hugs to help you out.
Unread 06-28-2000, 06:04 PM
Funny Patty isn't feeling so funny!

You are an awesome lady. Through all of that you still can find some humor, find some good, and bash men all at the same time.
I am so sorry about your friend that was killed. I will pray for your comfort and peace.
What a mess! You must be extremely strong. Remember God causes all things to work together for good to those who love Him.
God Bless
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Unread 06-28-2000, 06:14 PM
Funny Patty isn't feeling so funny!


It sounds like your having a REALLY bad week. But if anyone could find humor in any of those situations, it would be you. I love and look forward to your posts, as they always make me smile, even with a week like you've had. I'm sending some *giggle* hugs your way.

On a serious note, I will keep your friend with breast cancer in my prayers, as well as condolences to your friend and her family.

Keep your chin(s) up!!!


Unread 06-28-2000, 06:34 PM
Funny Patty isn't feeling so funny!

God Patty, I'm sorry to hear all of what you went thru and the loss of your friend. I would've been back on Xanax after the daughter thing. Good thing you have such a good sense of humor and that you have only been given what you can handle. I admire people that can be humerous and keep a positive attitude. Take care and remember, it'll get better. Meanwhile, try to keep smiling!
Unread 06-28-2000, 06:43 PM
Funny Patty isn't feeling so funny!

OH Patty,

What week. After all the tragedy and sadness you still made us laugh. That's truly special.
Unread 06-28-2000, 07:33 PM
Funny Patty isn't feeling so funny!


What can I say except WOW! It's been a trying time for you this week. I am so sorry to hear of your loss and will be praying for your friend that is fighting breast cancer. As for the rest I have an idea but can't figure out how to make it work. You see I have a wonderful friend that just moved away to Germany recently and I am devastated that she will not be here during my hyster. Thankfully she had her hyster early this year and was still here near friends. Anyway she recently sent me a letter talking about how spoiled we have been to have each other right next door for the past 2 years. Here was the solution.....we decided to build a community of our own...women only. Some of the women would work outside the community to make money, some would care for the children, some could take care of the cooking, etc. We can all go "outside" the community to have "special visits" with dh. This would solve your problem. Unfortunately we haven't been able to fund this little project but it is always something nice for me to dream about while I am soaking away my anger in a nice hot bubble bath!

Laughter truly is the best medicine so I feel certain you will be feeling better before you know it!
Unread 06-28-2000, 07:49 PM
Funny Patty isn't feeling so funny!

I wish i had half the strength you have, wow, what a week. I hope things can only get better from here on out, you deserve a nice break, i too have had a bad week with my baby being so sick. The people at the lab this morning had to tie her up to a board and take 7 viles of blood. they need to know what type of infection is in her blood. This is a bad week for us as well. Love ya, and will be praying for you.
Unread 06-28-2000, 09:01 PM
Funny Patty isn't feeling so funny!

So sorry to hear about your friend and the
car accident, and also about the friend having
breast cancer. It sounds like you have had a
tough week with your family. If you didn't live
so far away I would bring the John Deere over
for you to play with. I know how much you
enjoy tractors. I love your sense of humor,
even on a bad week!
Unread 06-28-2000, 09:13 PM
Funny Patty isn't feeling so funny!


That sounds like the kind of week I had when I would have PMS. (((HUGS)))) I am so sorry for your crappy week. Especially for the loss of your friend.

Sounds to me like since most incidents were caused by men...kick em to the curb sista!


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