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Inconsiderate, selfish teenage DD Inconsiderate, selfish teenage DD

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Unread 05-06-2002, 03:45 AM
Inconsiderate, selfish teenage DD

{{{{{{Dear Jandrie}}}}}}

I want to respond to your statement that your DS has been depressed and is asking you to take him to see a doctor. Please call today and make an appointment for him. I don't want to scare you, but I think it's very important that you follow through on his request now.

I'm glad that you are post-op now and can do this for him - please let me know how he is.


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Unread 05-06-2002, 03:50 AM
I agree with Karen

Please get your DS to a DR ASAP. So many bad things going on with teens. At least he is asking for help. Some just pretend nothing is wrong. I am so sorry for you and your family. You sound like you have a full plate at home. Yet you took the time to post here for me. Now I feel like a big ole cry baby! I am so sorry you are going through this right now. Your DS is in my thoughts and prayers. <<<<<hugs>>>>>>>
Unread 05-06-2002, 07:08 AM
Inconsiderate, selfish teenage DD

I also agree. If he asked to see a dr. and there is depression he should be seen. Lots of time it can be silent and if you continue to ignore certain request they can turn worse or you may ask yourself later why did this happen. My mom ignored my sister 17 at the time, sent her to her fathers house to have him deal with her, which made things worse and she grabbed my fathers gun and shot herself. I was only four at the time and do remember some of the events that led up to it. Usually when someone asks for help they mean it. We can never bring her back. I'm keeping you all in my prayers.
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Unread 05-06-2002, 08:03 AM
my dear son

thanks all and i did make the appointment last week for today. I am very aware of teen suicide altho i guess in our own it isnt always easy to see. he is not suicidal altho that doesnt mean in time things could not progress to that point and WHY i finally HEARD him. In fact he kept trying to tell me he thought he was aDD as he couldnt seem to concentrate.... i am upset enough as it is that i wasnt REALLY listening and while i took it seriously that he was/is under alot of pressure and feeling overwhelmed i didnt see some of the signs of depression and yet i do think now he is. Please dont rub it in, but hemoragging during Dec and January and trying to handle and prepare all this for ME and how hubby will manage etc i did lose track of HIM.My son is the light of my life and you all are so right how important this is, and i posted this already having made the appointment which is today. my hope is they put him on meds . yes i do have my hands full and in many ways am a single mom of 2 and i feel terribly as it is that i didnt jump on this.
Unread 05-06-2002, 08:18 AM
Teens are tough

Both of my teen sons are involved in everything. I had my surgery three weeks after the start of school last fall - football, band, cross country, girlfriends, you name it. Neither boy had his license to drive yet, and we do not live anywhere near any relatives.

We relied on neighbors, parents of classmates, and friends to try to help keep our sons' lives as near normal as possible. It reduced the stress for the kids - they were busy and not dwelling on "what's going on with mom". I was less stressed knowing that they were busy and not hanging out at the hospital. I saw my kids for a little while the day after my surgery, and came home after two nights. My 14 year old son was my "guardian angel" - he had surgery 9 months earlier and knew first hand how rough you can feel. The now 16 yr old son was completely oblivious to the whole process - only thing he noticed is that I was home for 6 weeks. He didn't hinder anything, but he didn't show the same compassion that his younger brother expressed. He was nice enough to say "You look horrible". But he wasn't the only one to say that.

Someone told me a few weeks ago that the reason teenagers act the way they do, is so that when they turn 18 and are ready to move out, you are ready to see them go. One of my kids really makes this statement feel very appropriate.

My vote would be for making arrangements for your daughter to attend her functions with a trusted classmate's family.
Unread 05-06-2002, 02:28 PM
Inconsiderate, selfish teenage DD


Don't beat yourself up or feel like you should have gotten your son in to see someone sooner. The important thing is you nothing bad happened! You listened to him, you made the appointment, and you're taking him to talk to someone. My goodness, you have so much on your plate- for your son to tell you he feels the need to talk to someone shows you have a very good line of communication with him.

While taking care of everyone else be sure you're taking care of yourself. You're still early in your recovery.


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