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Unread 05-14-2002, 04:25 AM

You know all those web sites out there with huge volumes of testimonials of unhappy, unhealty, worse-off women all regreting their hysterectomies and blaming everything on them?

Well - every time I hear a good-news story like yours it works to balance the scales a bit - stabilizing that emotional rollercoaster I have been on since the shock wore off!

I have been searching through this web site, downloading research and reading through the threads.

I would like to know what tips the balance to having a successful outcome - and if that is something we can control as patients. I am doing my ****dest to make sure I pick the best hands in the business to to the work - that even means a longer wait, but so be it. I have been in the health industry long enough, both here in Australia, and there in the US, to know how very many things can go wrong, and how much is up to human error. Its spooky to need to trust that implicitly - but you can't really control the variables when you are under 'general' !!

If it is true that they can reconstruct a sort-of prothesis cervix, I wonder if there is any reconstructive surgery that can be done for the clitorus?
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Unread 05-14-2002, 04:32 AM

Like any other surgery this one of course has risks. From what I have read, it is one of the safest surgeries performed today. It's the second most performed surgery on women, as I learned right here! The first being C-section. BTW I had a C-section so I kind of know what to expect as far as the incision and anesthesia. Stay off the sites that tell horror stories. I believe this site is much more balanced in the telling of recovery. Hyster-Sisters is one of a kind! You will make yourself crazy doing web searches trying to get more info! I know cause I did it! Did you read the stories on the home page from women who have already had their surgeries? Very positive stories there! We're with you so try and stay positive!
Unread 05-14-2002, 04:36 AM
Lil Hellion

As you can see by my last posting - we are on the same wave-length about the clit-reconstruction.

Don't know - but I will inquire.... I will let you know what I find out.

Don't worry - nothing offends me...I have been on the edge of 'weird' more than most, and have just about seen everything.

As for my husband, YES a big affirmative. He is a wonderful, sensitive and supporting friend and lover. Gorgeous man. Bodacious Greek-Aussie Aries with big brown eyes and a wild gypsy heart. After having the worst, I now have the best.

When I had the emotional meltdown on Saturday night, I asked him if he wanted out of the marriage, as it looked as if he was going to be married to a eunich. He neither ridiculed me, nor condoned the suggestion - just said we'd find options no matter what the outcome would be. Suggested I keep a diary of the experience, but with all of you as support, I can make the diary and interactive experience.
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Unread 05-14-2002, 04:45 AM

I am so happy for you in that you have such a terrific hubby. Lean on him! He will love you no matter what as you would be the same way with him. This kind of situation makes love stronger in relationships that are already very good. My hubby is the same way. Just hugs me and tells me we will worry about things as they come. He has never belittled me or gotten tired of my talking about the surgery. He chuckles when I tell him I am now paying more attention to every nuance of love making just in case it IS different when I am recovered! LOL You have half the battle won in that you have loving support at home. Many women here have no one. Not one person to help them along. You are a very blessed woman in spite of what you have gone through. You will not be a ******. Think of this surgery as getting rid of something that has caused you nothing but trouble. Stay positive! Keep in touch to let us know how you are doing! Hugs!
Unread 05-14-2002, 04:55 AM
SOS - "Sisters Offering Support"

Hey Storm

A journal is an excellent idea. There is a hystersisters journal available from this site. I got one and wrote in it constantly. Keeping track of emotions and concerns and results of DR appointments, etc was a great outlet.

I believe that a person's attitude can have an impact on the outcome of their surgery and recovery. Knowledge is a powerful tool, but try not to let someone else's negative experience scare you - understand the risks and acknowlege the possiblilties of complications, but believe that you are going to be one of those whose surgery and recovery is smooth. There will be bumps along the way so when you hit one don't let it throw you into a funk.

I'm so glad you have such a caring suportive DH.
Unread 05-14-2002, 05:25 AM

Dear Storm,
I am so sorry that you have gone thru that! My heart goes out to you and consider yourself hugged from a Canadian! s I am 8 weeks post and cervix is gone. I too worried about whether I would hurt during sex and whether I would have any libido. I can honestly say that is one thing I did not leave in the castle!!!!--What libido I had when I went in the castle I certainly have now and maybe more. (lol) Intercourse did not hurt although we were so nervous. It was exciting --- I felt like a virgin because it had been a little more then 6 weeks. We did use a lubricate just to make a little easier.
This scripture came to mind when thinking of you:
Isaiah 40:31----But those who wait upon the Lord
Shall renew their strength;
They shall mount up with wings like eagles,
They shall run and not be weary.
They shall walk and not faint.
Take care and may God Bless you!!
Love, Pam (rainbow on chat)
Unread 05-14-2002, 08:44 AM
SOS - "Sisters Offering Support"

I can not express to you the compassion I feel towards you and your bravery at this time. I am sooooooo glad you found this site...... or shall we say, "divine intervention" brought you here?

With all that you are going through this is the place for you to be. The support of non judgemental woman is a very safe place to vent, seek validation and guideance.

Welcome to this site and to the open arms of comfort and safety of other woman who have had to face the fears of the unknown as well.

I am so sorry for your experience of abuse........ I am so furious at this man! (trying hard to contain myself right now)

I take my hat off to you........... for you strong spirit and courage.
My best wishes and most positive thoughts sent your way.
xo DonnaFay
Unread 05-14-2002, 12:05 PM
SOS - "Sisters Offering Support"

Dear Storm,
I am SO glad you found us. I am deeply saddened by your horrible sound like an incredibly strong woman.

I don't regret my hysterectomy at all. You will feel so much better after. Keep posting and check out the post-op board as well. A few weeks of some discomfort is worth it, trust me!

My blessings to you
Unread 05-14-2002, 12:40 PM
SOS - "Sisters Offering Support"

Dearest Storm,
I have said it before and I'll say it again... Sometimes these posts make me laugh and sometimes they make me cry. When I read your post all I could do was think about what a strong woman you are. Those of us that have never lived through abuse can draw from your strength. I don't have any good advice but I can offer many s and say," welcome", you came to the right place. I for one need to hear from woman like you. You will give us as much as I hope we can give you. Thanks for being here. Karlene
Unread 05-15-2002, 12:07 AM
SOS - "Sisters Offering Support"

Dear Storm,

I wanted to thank you for talking about the hard stuff. I was taught that freedom comes from being able to let people know who you are and what's going on with you.

I haven't had my surgery yet, but my reproductive system has been chemically shut down for 8 months. I feel like I'm finally moving into womanhood, like I'm getting ready to go through a second coming of age. Except this one is without the angst and terror and self-hate of my teen-age years.

I'm glad you have a good man- you deserve to be treasured, not shamed.

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