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Have to vent again -- sorry, guys Have to vent again -- sorry, guys

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  #1  
Unread 07-23-2002, 12:26 PM
Have to vent again -- sorry, guys

Hi -- it is me again. I have to vent again, because I am very upset. Yesterday, I was feeling very, very low (almost suicidal) -- I have problems with panic attacks and all kinds of things were running through my head (like why go through with chemo -- might as well just end it all). So I called my psychiatrist, whom I have called before in such circumstances. She called me back and proceeded to tell me that she was too busy to talk to me (that she only had a minute between clients), that she only wanted to talk to me about medication issues from now on, and if the suicidal feelings continued, that I should call the on-call MD later that night or else call my therapist. Needless to say, I felt very abandoned by her. This is not the first instance I have had trouble with her -- when I have an appointment with her, she is always late and takes phone calls in the middle of our sessions (nonemergency) and I've told her that it bothers me when she does these things, but she had the nerve to tell me she was too busy to talk to me yesterday and to call my therapist. So, I called my therapist crying and he managed to calm me down. He said he was going to report her (the psychiatrist is a resident) to her supervisor for poor conduct with an upset patient. After talking about it with my husband, I decided to ask for another psychiatrist at the clinic. I called the clinic this morning and left a message with the person who is in charge of such things. She proceeded to call me back later with a different story that she heard from my psychiatrist that I won't bother to get into. Well, this all happened at work this a.m. and I had to go out into the hall and cry my head off over it. I told the person at the clinic that I had cancer and I do not have time to waste with people who act like they do not have time for me, but she didn't want me to make any decisions about getting another psychiatrist (who would have less experience) while I was so upset. My boss had to come out into the hall and comfort me while I was crying -- I was so embarrassed. Does any of this make any sense? Do you have any words of advice for me? I just feel like I'm lost in the storm right now and I don't know what to do.

Love,

Cyndy
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  #2  
Unread 07-23-2002, 12:47 PM
{{{Cyndy}}}

Hey sweetie,
I'm so sorry you had to go through all of that mess!! The good thing is your boss was there to offer you some comfort. Cyndy, it's your choice to do what you want to do in regards to a new therapist. This is your body and your mind no one elses. I'm sure this isn't an easy choice for you right now. I had to get a new therapist. Heck, I've had three, LOL You are the important one in this situation. Please know Cyndy, we are here for you, anytime you need us ok? I'm an email or im away sweetie. And if ya need me to, I can call ya! I have a fantastic long distance plan!! Please remember that you are in my heart and my prayers! EVERYDAY! God will see ya through! I feel a miracle coming on for you!
Love and hugs,
Susan
  #3  
Unread 07-23-2002, 01:23 PM
Oh, Cyndy--that's Awful!

First, never apologizing for venting. This is one of the best vent places I know. We all are cancer warriors and know how things go--and there are a lot of downhills in this disease. I jumped when I read about your panic attacks--I have gotten these and this a.m. it was so bad I thought I'd die before I got home and took a lorazepam (a daytime no-no for me) and an hour later was doing better. But just because I recognize them and can say what it is does not make it easier. I can say "I'm having a panic attack right now" and I still have the symptoms. That psychiatrist was very non professional--I am very fortunate to have a great social worker but it took some pressure on the HMO to get one who was a female cancer survivor. She's heavily booked--it's mid-August for me and I hate to wait that long. Of course the psychiatrist told another story--she has to make herself look good and so it's easy to say, "well, THAT patient..." Her conduct while with you (taking other calls, being late, etc. is improper. And who'll be believed? Sounds like you have a great boss which is helpful and heck--stop and think about it--haven't a number of people had bad days at work and lost it? I can't recall the number of times I had to use one of the bathrooms up at the CCB and heard crying going on and the number of times I saw help obviously going on in the halls and the number of times I was the helper. It happens. It's embarrassing, but people who know your circumstances will understand--and as for the others--who cares? We all get lost in this cancer storm but don't you dare do anything or I'll get even more upset and I am at upset limits for a while now. So you hang in there. And vent here. Or e-mail me. Or Susan. It's bad enough dealing with cancer and recurrence--but arrogant doctors take things over the top--they're supposed to help us! Hang in there. We Badgers are tough and feisty and fighters (and I guess a little smelly too although I do use Bath and Body Cucumber Melon Shower Gel every day...) BIG
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  #4  
Unread 07-23-2002, 04:28 PM
Have to vent again -- sorry, guys

OH CYNDY,
I AM SO SORRY FOR YOU. I TO SUFFER FROM ANXIETY ATTACKS AND THEY ARE NOT FUN. NO ONE KNOWS WHAT THEY ARE UNTIL THEY EXPERIENCE THEM!!
I TAKE XANAX AND THAT ISN'T DOING THE TRICK LIKE IT USED TOO EITHER.
AS FOR THE STUPID PSYCHIATRIST, I THINK SHE SHOULD BE REPORTED BY ALL MEANS!!!! HOW DARE SHE SHRUG SOMEONE OFF THAT NEEDS ATTENTION?? SHE SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF HERSELF **** IT. SOME PEOPLE ARE SO INCONSIDERATE I CAN'T IMAGINE WHY SHE WOULD WANT TO GO INTO THAT PROFESSION IF SHE'S SOOOO BUSY AND CAN'T TAKE AN EMERGENCY CALL??
PLEASE TRY AND CALM DOWN, TAKE WHATEVER THEY PRESCRIBED
FOR YOU AND A DEEP BREATH. I AM SO SORRY, I AM ANGRY NOW. THE NERVE!!
REMEMBER THAT THIS WILL ALL TURN OUT O.K. HANG IN THERE AND DON'T EVER THINK OF QUITTING!!
GOD PUT YA HERE FOR A REASON PLEASE REMEMBER THAT CYNDY.
HE WILL HELP YOU THROUGH THIS DIFFICULT TIME, I KNOW IT.
  #5  
Unread 07-23-2002, 06:09 PM
Have to vent again -- sorry, guys

I am so sorry that you are going through this.

My experience with psychiatrists is that it appears that their only area of expertise is limited to medication. Their training doesn't seem to prepare them for good, supportive therapy. When I worked in a hospital, I would cringe when the psychiatrists were called in. All they did was order medication without TALKING to the patients. Psychologists (PhD's) or Social Workers (MSW's) seem to be much better at being supportive, especially in a crisis.

I admit that I am biased about this, but I am. I hope that you find someone who is better skilled. You deserve the best, darn it!!
  #6  
Unread 07-23-2002, 06:49 PM
Have to vent again -- sorry, guys

((((Cyndy))))))
Adding my hugs here as well!!
Boy....that doctor really needs a course in how to handle a patient in crisis!! You called her for help, and she put you off that way!! Not good at all!!!
I would venture to guess that your complaint is not the first, and she may find herself in hot water sooner than later.

Search out a new psychiatrist my friend. For every bad one there are tons of good ones!! You don't need to hear about her troubles. She is being paid to help you, and she should be comforting you not causing you more distress!

I am very glad that your boss was there for you, and that you posted here to us as well. I know how difficult anxiety is as I have a bi-polar sister, and its not something you can turn on and off, and when you reach out to your doctor for help, you need to know that they are there for you.

Keep us posted hon, and take care, and don't you dare apologize for venting!! Its good for the soul!!!!!!
Lots of love and huge hugs!!
Maria xoxoxo
  #7  
Unread 07-23-2002, 07:05 PM
Have to vent again -- sorry, guys

s Cyndy

Having worked in a hospital for a long time, I have to agree with everything Diane said. MSW's or psycologists are the way to go. And some specialize in patients with serious illnesses. Get your family doc to prescribe any antidepressants or anti anxiety meds you may need. Get rid of the psychiatrist if at all possible.
And remember, we are always here for you!!!!
Hope you're feeling better today.

karenann
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