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What's with people? What's with people?

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Unread 09-14-2002, 11:53 AM
What's with people?

I am so full of questions right now (one week out) -- but the biggest one this afternoon, what's with people? There seem to be all these people in my life that just aren't getting it! If I hear "you need to call another doctor" one more time I'm gonna scream! Another doctor isn't going to change the adhesions or the tumors or the pain! And why is it everyone *but* me seems to have a problem with my not being able to get pregnant? That doesn't mean I can't have a family! Can anyone relate to what I'm feeling? Everyone is so concerned about how this effects *them* that they're more worried about themselves than *me*! HEY! This is happening to *me*! I swear to God, my ex-husband (yes, ex -- for almost four years) told me I was the only person he ever wanted to have children with, and I was ruining that plan for him! I am astonished! One friend said I should see another Dr., because sometimes tumors (baseball sized, mind you) can just go away on their own! (I've had problems for 12 years, if it's not gone yet....) Anyway, thanks for listening to me sound off, I've just had it! I realize this is a shock to some people and hard to deal with, but, Geez! How do these jokers think *I* feel?? Any input, comments, shared experiences are appreciated!!!
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Unread 09-14-2002, 12:24 PM
What's with people?

Yes I remember it well.. Just one of the many helpful comments I received was to "Not have the surgery, doctors always want you to have surgery, it will go away on it's own". I kid you not. Mind you I had a 10 cm cyst growing larger by the minute and more cysts on my ovaries, as well as a large fibroid. Just attribute this to foot in mouth disease. People sometimes don't know what to say, and try to make you feel better, although many times they fail.

THIS IS BETWEEN YOU AND YOUR DR. No one knows your condition and your body like you. Trust yourself and your doc that you are doing the best thing for your health.

Hugs and good luck to you!

Unread 09-14-2002, 01:45 PM
What's with people?

Try not to listen to them.
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Unread 09-14-2002, 03:29 PM
What's with people?

I have one very anti-Western-medicine friend who tried to convince me that if I would just change my lifestyle and diet, and take a few suppliments that my fibroids would go away.

Even giving him the benefit of the doubt, that it *would* work, I had no interest in changing my life to accomodate a diseased organ that I never wanted anyway, and could have removed to effect a "sure cure", right now.

When he gets fibroids, he can play with his alternative cures.

I also didn't get a second opinion, because with all the bleeding and cramps I had (and photos of my fiboids), I was pretty darned sure a hyst would fix it once and for all, and was not interested in exploring my options.

I don't know what's with people. I guess let them know that you've (amazingly) *thought about it already*, and are doing what's best for you. If they run into similar problems with their own bodies they can handle it however *they* see fit, and you can compare notes over tea someday.
Unread 09-14-2002, 04:06 PM
I can relate...

Not having had any children (3 miscarriages), many people have been encouraging me to look at other options as well just being sure that I might regret not having children. The bottom line for me is that I've seen 2 doctors and got the same recommendations. My DH and I had already decided not to have children, so I politely tell people that even if I kept my uterus, I still wouldn't be having any children, so why continue with the pain, heavy bleeding, etc. when I don't have to do so.
Unread 09-14-2002, 07:58 PM
What's with people?

So, here's to all those folks getting a migraine headache. Tell them that sometimes those go away on their own, too, so they shouldn't consider medical treatment!

Unread 09-14-2002, 08:34 PM
What's with people?

I am so sorry you are in so much pain.

I think people mean well- but even if you get a second opinion(like I did) you will have a friend who tells you "you should have a third"(like I did)

Favorite supportive comment:

Or a well meaning friend who asks you "aren't you afraid of lossing your womanhood"

Sorry but if that includes me bleeding 20 days out of the month and horrible cramps- take it away!

This is between you and your Doctor- we are the only ones who knows how much pain we are in.

I think the other issue- is my friends are young- hopefully they won't have to endure this- but it they do I know what to say- and what not to say

Good Luck
Unread 09-14-2002, 08:47 PM

Please read your private message- I sent you something in it...
Take care
Unread 09-14-2002, 09:35 PM
I can relate!

I'm so sorry you have to go through this...I had a "well meaning" aquaintance (friend of husbands wife, barely know her) call and leave a message on my phone..."Don't do this, stop! I hope it's not too late"!
Oh my, I ignored her (and him), and focused on calming my dh down.
The "friend" had convinced my dh I would become this monster if I had my surgery. I calmly explained I was a monster now, hadn't he noticed?? lol, and the hyst would help to tame the monster! (It has!)
This was one week before and boy did I want to give her a piece of my mind! But, I didn't. I realized she had her opinion and I had mine and I did not have the time for such nonsence!
Anyway, it is your body and your decision alone. I am sure all will go fine.
Hugs and Luvs
Unread 09-14-2002, 11:10 PM
What's with people?

Oh!! I almost cried when I read your post!! I have been to so many doctors - different doctors too!! Even my gyn wnats me to have many opinions!! I've been fighting with this for months!!
And yes, I am so sick of hearing about the kids thing - we don't want kids -at all. It took my husband actually yelling at my gyno to get him to lay off of that. He kept putting off surgery, thinking I'd hopefully change my mind and want to get pregnant! I will be so glad when this is over and I won't have to hear all ths anymore!

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