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am i doing the right thing am i doing the right thing

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Unread 12-30-2002, 06:27 PM
am i doing the right thing

Hi everyone I am new here and not sure if i am doing this right. I am wondering if I am doing the right thing. The closer I get to my surgery the more I have second thoughts. I have a fibroid and enlarged ovarie on my left side and adhesions on my right side and everything is stuck together. I feel bloated all the time and tired. I have tenderness on my right side and not all the time but I will get really bad abdominal pain but not all the time. I think that's why I am wondering if I am doing the right thing because I am not in pain all the time. But when i am it's really bad. I still have regular periods and they are not that bad. I am scheduled for a total hysterectomy on Jan.14th and am afraid of going into menopause right away. My doctor said he would put me on estrogen right away but I have heard different things about doing that right away. Does anyone have the same problems as mine or any advise for me. I would really appreciate hearing from you.
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Unread 12-30-2002, 06:34 PM
am i doing the right thing

Hi Lynniej

Welcome to Hystersisters. Your story sounds a lot like mine in that I was a fibroid sufferer (two times, woo hoo) and wasn't in pain all the time. However, when it was bad it was very bad, to the point of not wanting to get out of bed. The deciding factor for me was when I lost my quality of life. I'd become a slave to my cycle, having to plan my life around it, and that's no way to live. That's one question you really need to ask yourself.

If you're having doubts of any kind it never hurts to seek a second opinion. You should only do what you feel comfortable with and not what someone tells you to do.

I hope this helps you in some way. Continue to read the forums and ask questions. Research all of your options. Make use of the resource material listed on the main forum page and of the pull down menus (found at the top right of this screen.) And always remember your new "sisters" are here for you.

Unread 12-30-2002, 06:43 PM
My advise to you: research, research and more research

and you are doing research right now by asking others to relate their experiences to you. Great search engine on this site to help you. And yes, in two weeks, you can learn a ton.

Believe it or not, the problems shaping up right before surgery happens and it is a fooler. Honestly, do you think a real temporary break in your symptoms is going to last? I think you don't or else you wouldn't be teetering about your decision.

My opinion here and I do have a tendency to be frank, but I think your doc is glossing over the HRT issue with you just like mine did with me. And it isn't fair when docs do that. I want everyone who comes here to be mentally and emotionally prepared for surgical menopause. And that means education. If your doc isn't being informative enough, well, plenty of informed women here at HS to help you out. Yeah, you guessed it, more research!

Endo is very responsive to estrogen, as you probably already know. It does influence HRT choices for many women. Suggest you drop on in to the Hormone Jungle boards and do some reading about how women with endo DX's are responding to this problem.

Welcome to the group! Bet you are saying oh brother! I have to do homework and groaning by now.
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Unread 12-30-2002, 07:54 PM
am i doing the right thing

Ah, questioning is always bound to happen. If you really are unsure, you may want a second opinion. For me, it was the absolute BEST thing I did. I feel sooooo much better than I did even the day before the surgery. Read as much as you can on this site and ask every question you can think of. No topic is off limits.

Unread 12-30-2002, 07:59 PM
am i doing the right thing


So glad you have brought your questions and concerns here...we are happy to help support you and are here for you anytime.

What you are going through sounds very much like what I experienced before my surgery. I had pain off and on in my lower right side for the last several years. I also had adhesions sticking everything together and regularly cycled periods.

The only thing with me is that I wish I would have gotten myself taken care of about all this sooner but was scared until I did a search and found this wonderful site.

The closer my castle time got, it seemed like the more I hurt.

My biggest fear was the HRT too so I can totally relate to how you feel now. Between the pain and general icky feeling all the time I think i was ready by the time I did get help.

I feel better now than I thought possible. I never really knew what feeling well was like till now.

I am in no way trying to talk you into having the surgery. This has just been my experience. You do what is right for you.

I didnt have endo so I was able to start estrogen right in the castle. We are all unique and can respond differently to a lot of things. You will just have to find what works for you. Hopefully it will be an easy road for you as it was for me to find your balance.

Also, if you are having second may consider another opinion, even being close to your surgery date. You can always reschedule if you feel you need more time to decide.

We are here for you, whatever you decide to do.

Please search around the site here and see what all we offer. There are forums for HRT questions and concerns, no HRT, other options, etc., as well as non-hyst related areas.

Unread 12-30-2002, 08:36 PM
am i doing the right thing

My surgery was to be Jan. 15th but I canceled it today.
I had several reasons for doing it. But first let me tell you that my doctor wanted to perform a total hysterectemy for grade IV endometriosis. (I don't suffer from sever pain - and I'm not completely miserable - I work and I don't stay out sick when I'm menstrating.)
The very next thing I did was purchase 3 books;

Natural Hormone Balance for Women
Uzzi Reiss, MD./OBGYN

the Endometriosis Source Book
The definitive guide to current treatment options, the latest research, common myths about the disease, and coping strategies- both physical and emotional
(Mary Lou Ballweg and the Endometriosis Association)

Hysterectomy & Ovary Removal
What ALL women need to KNOW
(Elizabeth Plourde)

The reading was EYE OPENING and I suggest to anyone facing a hysterectomy go out and find current reading and research before making your desicion, Because if you are not suffering from a life threatning condition your doctor (SURGON) will recomend this surgery without offering other OPTIONS. 99% of all hysterectomies are ELECTIVE.

My doctor told me that the only cure for endo was to have this operation. One of the first items I read in the endo source book was, 'if your doctor is telling you the hyterectomy is a cure, find another doctor'. There is NO CURE for ENDO!

What I am doing now is working with a Naturpath - diet, alternative remedies and supplimentation to boost my immune system will help and has helped me. And I'm also looking for a doctor who has a mind set to preserve the organs. I'm fully aware that I may have to have some type of surgery in the future but it will not be this.

There is a trade off with hysterectomy and I fear that the quality of my life will not improve and may (I say may) be altered for the worst. My doctor didn't even touch on some of the problems that may occurr with hysterectomy and ovary removal and that made me extremely suspisious. She also let me walk out of her office without even offering other therapies. That truly made me feel hopeless - I know it isn't hopeless now.

Every woman has to grab the bull by the horn and take an active roll in her health care. If your doctor isn't telling you EVERYTHING then you should go elsewhere and not to ANOTHER SERGON. Be in charge of your health - because it's only you who can make this decision and make sure you are fully informed.

Unread 12-30-2002, 11:20 PM

and you will have many over this whole thing. There are other options. I, like you had a large fibroid, pelvic pain and as the months went by, things got only worse. I started to bleed in between periods, more heavily, more painful periods. I just didnt want to keep going down this road.
I went to see Dr. Bruce McLucas who is out of UCLA. He is doing a procedure that actually shrinks the fibroids that it pretty successful. I decided on the hyst because I have had all my kids and I just didnt feel this passion to keep my uterus like some feel.
Thats just something no one can decide for you.
Try to do what works for you personally no matter what anyone says. If you see that things get worse as time goes by, maybe then make a decesion.
Good luck and
God bless,
Unread 12-31-2002, 05:38 AM
am i doing the right thing

Hi Lynnie

Welcome to HysterSisters! If you are having serious doubts then you definitely need to go for a second, third, however many opinions you need to be sure of your decision. I would also suggest that you check out the Hysterectomy Options and Alternatives board. There are other treatments available for fibroids; adhesions I don't know.

I have read and re-read your post and I don't see where you mentioned endo as one of your problems - just fibroids and adhesions.

Fibroids usually continue to grow until menopause, but even with menopause they may shrink somewhat but don't go away. My uterus was the size of a 16-18 week pregnancy due to fibroids. I couldn't sit for any length of time because of the pressure, and just bending to tie my shoes was an effort. Plus it was pressing on my bladder and I had to pee frequently. The last straw was the neverending period - one of the last ones was 46 days.

HRT can be difficult to get a proper balance, but not necessarily so. My DR started me out with Estrace 1mg/day 2 weeks after surgery. I haven't changed the dosage, ever. I am almost 11 months post op and I feel great. I haven't had any hot flashes or anything else. No more mood swings - my DH refers to my Estrace as my "happy pills" and has told me many times how much better my moods and temper have become.

I do want to make a comment about the book by Elizabeth Plourde. She has an agenda, she is anti-hyst for all reasons, reading her book will scare the wits out of you. I don't believe it gives a balanced view of hysterectomy.

The Hyster Sisters site is neither anti-hyst nor pro-hyst, rather, it is an online community of women who give and receive support for hysterectomy decisions and recovery. offers resources and kindness so that our visitors can discover options and make decisions for themselves. No one here is going to gloss over the possiblity of complications. You can go to Post Op, or the Road, or the Hormone jungle and find out what some ladies are dealing with. One thing to remember is that a great majority of ladies who have uneventful recoveries don't post much and say so.

Best wishes and good luck!
Unread 12-31-2002, 06:52 AM
am i doing the right thing

hi lynnie,

I too would recommend that you get another opinion. I too had fibroids and over a period of about 10 years, during which I was advised to "watch and wait," my quality of life steadily declined. I ended up, on the advice of my PCP, seeking another opinion from a surgeon with a great reputation and he confirmed what was happening to me, gave me a much more extensive list of options for treating my fibroids, but clearly said that 999 out of 1000 women wouldn't put up with the level of discomfort I must be having. I felt that finally someone had validated my misery and I went ahead with the surgery. I feel much better and am convinced it was the right thing for me at that point; had I acted earlier, had I had better advice earlier on, I could perhaps have been eligible for other treatments.

I also had an easy recovery and only a little trouble adjusting to my hormone therapy. I have no qualms about being on estrogen and actually feel better balanced hormonally than I have for many years.

For women like us, it often becomes a question of quality of life. I had just finally had it! I could still function, but my enjoyment of life was diminished and I couldn't pursue some of the activities I really enjoyed because of my discomfort. I was anemic, run down (I had pneumonia!), had back pain, heartburn, pressure, stress incontinence--you name it! Perhaps you are not yet at that point. So perhaps you should reconsider. I'm sure that one of the reasons my recovery was so easy was that I had been so miserable before and immediately took heart when I saw that I was going to feel better.

good luck in making this difficult decision!
Unread 01-01-2003, 09:22 AM
am i doing the right thing

Thanks to everyone who has responded to my thoughts. I didn't mention that I do have endo also, the doctor said I have a frozen pelvis everything is stuck together. When he did my laproscope he tried to move my ovaries and he couldn't. When he tried to move my left ovary he popped an endo cyst. I too have been seeing a gastro doc for years and he has been treating me for IBS all this time and also acid reflux. I always told him that I felt so bloated all the time. He said that goes along with IBS. So when my last two episodes of severe pain happened he changed my medicine that I was taking for IBS, then I asked him if it could be related to my periods and he said it was possable. I asked if I thought I should talk to my gyno and he said it wouldn't hurt. So that's when I went to my gyno and told him what was happening and he said to have the laproscope to see what was going on. Then that's when I found out that I had endo pretty bad he said and the fibroid is about the size of his fist and my left ovarie is enlarged and my right side has adhesions. He told my husband no wonder I was in so much pain. I have always gone for my yearly pap tests but I never thought to ask him about the bad abdominal pain because I just thought it was my IBS. I regret not realizing that earlier. I just thought it was weird that in the last year my stomach has really gotten big. I new inside that it just wasn't gaining weight. It looks pretruded. Even my mother noticed when I went to see her in September. She lives in Florida.
She said whats wrong with your stomach and I said I probably have a tumer Just kidding around. She said don't say that but I new inside something just didn't seem right. I had the scope done in December. I wish I would have acted on my inner thoughts earlier. I guess my lesson is always listen to your body because you know it best. Sorry for rambling on but this really helps me that I know I can tel fellow Hyster Sisters my thoughts and they will understand. Thanks so much for listening to me. I am feeling more secure about myself since I have found you to talk to. Also I have found two good books to read that a friend of mine gave me. They are SMART MEDICINE FOR MENOPAUSE HRT AND ITS NATURAL ALTERNATIVE by Sandra Cabot and SUDDEN MENOPAUSE by Debbie Deangelo. I will keep in touch with you the closer I get to surgery.

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