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fistula surgery fistula surgery

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Unread 01-05-2003, 08:40 PM
fistula surgery

Hey Louise,

The 15th. That is my DH's bd. I can tell him that one birthday gift is that yet another hysterfistulasister gets fixed. He'll be thrilled. I think I said this before, but the ditropan worked way better than the detrol for me. Have you tried it? Also, I did the diaper but also lined it with 3 maxi pads and/or incontinence pads. Also slept on a blue pad. Usually I could make it at least half way through the night.

I can remember some of your earlier posts. The things you said about your husband when all this was starting showed how kind and concerned and on you side he was. I agree with the others-our husbands love us, warts and all, and only want us to get well. It is hard for them when they can't fix things.

will be praying for the waiting.

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Unread 01-06-2003, 10:07 AM
fistula surgery


Don't even think the way you have been thinking. Things will get better and even though we will never forget about what all we have had to go through this will pretty soon be something that happened along time ago.

I was so scared because I felt like I had been leaking for so long that what if it couldn't be fixed. Every time I was out in public that people could tell. I went to the grocery store once and started leaking so much that I had to leave real quick to get out and I was already going through my pad and I could feel my pants getting wet. I was so embarressed. But I don't think anybody even noticed.

I'm at the month mark the 11th of this month and I have no leaking and am starting to get my energy back and get my life back. My Dr. has been wonderful and did such a good job I don't know what I would do without him. It takes time or at least it did for me. But as my DH told me last night, You have been through 3 surgery's in the last 6mo. so it's going to take time. Don't worry. You need to be stress free so everything can go towards you healing and getting better.

Remember we all are with you and you are in our thought and prayers. Just plan on doing nothing for about a month because you want everything to hel good. That was hard for me cause I kept thinking this won't hurt and I can do this. But then I would tell myself you have the rest of your life so what's a month.

Unread 01-06-2003, 10:07 AM
fistula surgery

Good morning my friends!

Thank you all so much for your support, it helps alot!

The 15th is also my brother's bd, and also my dh's best friend's bd-we should have a party!

MJ & Barbara, I have graduated to the diapers and at night I use that plus the pads. I hate the leaking which is now more like gushing! It never was this bad, why did it get worse after the foley came out? I can now totally understand why babies cry when they're wet!

I got an e-mail from Terry, she is having alot of problems after her surgery(infections, pain...) Send her a note if you can, I know she'll be glad to hear from you.

You are all wonderful-thanks for your support, I couldn't make it through this without you!

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Unread 01-06-2003, 10:11 AM
fistula surgery

Thanks, Kim!

Unread 01-06-2003, 11:07 AM
fistula surgery

Originally posted by Louise2
I know it's really stupid, but I am starting to feel ashamed that I am leaking like this-I don't even talk about it with my dh because it must be a major turn-off and I feel like he will never find me attractive again. I feel like an old woman now, and I think back to all the promises from friends who had a hysterectomy, and said how "wonderful" my life would be after I had the surgery! One friend who had a hysterectomy last year, just got a tummy tuck and lipo, and is constantly telling me how great she looks and feels, and that I should start saving now so next year I can get a tuck! I told her I will NEVER have surgery again unless it is absolutely needed, and she laughed and said I'd change my mind! They don't get it...
(((Louise))))) Even though I do not have the fistula issue, I still have problems with incontinence (mostly stress incontinence, but also a bit of urge incontinence) and I know just how you feel about his I haven't discussed this with DH either, though he knows, because I also think it would be a turn off. Which is kind of stupid because, after all, it's not our fault and it's not something we can control

I agree that you don't need a tummy tuck!!! I also thought I should get one when, after my hyst, I still was overweight and looked 4 or 5 months pregnant. This was 8 months later. However, when I started feeling better, I started a weight loss program and lost 51 lbs. My tummy also went down and, even though it's a bit flabby and we won't even mention the stretch marks, DH and everyone around me all agree that I look stunning. And I'm with you: the next surgery will only take place if it's absolutely required.

Sending lots of s your way.
Unread 01-06-2003, 11:37 AM
fistula surgery

Louise - I know what you are talking about!!!! My weirdness was that I wanted to tell everyone about my "affliction" and I'm sure I made more than a few nervous with my frankness regarding peeing, pee holes, urethras, catheters, foley bags, urine bags, urine, vagina, vaginal, vagainal canal, fistula, etc., etc.! My saving grace was to find wonderful friends via this website. It helps so much to be able to pound it out on the computer and then see a response. My daughter and dh got pretty sick of me always talking about it! I think they are still freaked out somewhat..seing that neither of them has asked how I've been doing lately?!? They are two peas in a pod and don't think the way I do, so it is an adjustment for me to realize that, yes, they do still love me and they do care.

Regarding the tummy tuck, lipo, I agree with Suferbabe, no surgeries unless necessary. I saw a plastic surgery special on MTV the other day and one of the girls on it had a botched lipo job on her legs, butt, hips. It was awful and she has had to suffer through eight additional surgeries to try and fix the original one. She cried and shared her thoughts and I sat there and cried with her because it almost sounded like one of us. She also heard the speech about how great she would look (we all heard how great we would feel) and if she could turn back time, she wouldn't have the lipo. Our surgeries were necessary, but honestly, I think I would have waited a few more years, suffered through, and maybe the results would have been fistulaless.

I'm getting rather wordy and need to cut this off, but hang in there and get to the 15th. Speaking of that, I think I missed something regarding the 22nd. Is there a chance you are going to be resheduled?

You are in my prayers, Joce
Unread 01-06-2003, 01:36 PM
fistula surgery

Dany, How did you lose all that weight? I have gained almost 25lbs from this little journey, so I'll need all the help I can get! Thanks so much for the kind words!

Joce, my family is the same way! I'm sure I drive them crazy because we can be talking about anything, and all of I sudden I start talking about the fistula, peeing, catheters, or one of you girls!

Last night my dh made a comment to my oldest dd, that I talked to you girls more than I did my family and friends(you ARE my friends!) I just get the feeling from him that he is just sick of all this (he said he just feels bad for me) I am tired of this too so I don't blame him-I just want it over! My friends call often but all they say is "you poor thing" Well, I am sick of being pitied!

Oh well, I'm off to the movies with the grandkids. (I used to have to bring diapers for them...)

Love you all!

Unread 01-06-2003, 02:50 PM
fistula surgery

((((Louise)))))) I remember how the hysterectomy was all I could think about, both pre-op and post-op and how folks around me would phase out whenever I brought up the subject. I guess it's hard for those around us to understand just how much this surgery affects every aspects of our lives. It must be even worst with the complications brought on by the fistula

I lost the weight thanks to a weight loss support group, much like the old Weight Watchers, with the exchange program. It's called "Mincavi" and most of their chapters are located in the Province of Quebec, Canada. However, they're starting to open chapters elsewhere, including the latest opening in Vancouver. I love their program: it's strict, but you get to eat most of everything (in moderation) and they have recipe books and some of their recipes are really good. Here's a link to their web-site: . BTW, my weight loss took over 10 months and I started it 8 months after my hyst....

If you're interested, you can join us on BEST (Better Eaters Support Team), right here on Hyster Sisters. We're just a bunch of sisters who are supporting each other with weight loss issues, and eating right. Here's the link:

However, while it is always the right time to start eating right, you really need to concentrate on your upcoming surgery and on recovering from it.. You can still come and see us, but you know the training....
Unread 01-07-2003, 10:33 AM
fistula surgery

Morning all!

Hope all of you are well this morning! I had a good day yesterday, leaking wasn't too bad took the grandboys to the movies and did a little shopping with their mom(we bought girl baby clothes-she's expecting and we're tempting fate!)

Barbara, I'm trying to convince dh that we should take off for Vegas this weekend, but I don't think he's gonna bite! I can't offer him the enticements a weekend like that usually means (If you know what I mean...)

Dany, thanks for the info, I will definately check it out!

I got another e-mail from Terry, she's feeling better. Hopefully, she'll post soon. I told her we were all thinking and praying for her.

Gotta go, I'm babysitting the boys today and they're awfully quiet!
Unread 01-07-2003, 12:55 PM
fistula surgery

Hello all,

Hope everyone is doing ok. Well went to the Dr. today for a ck-up. He had not seen me since the cathator was taken out by his partner. He said from the urine sample it looks like I have alittle infection. He put me on anti and said that should take care of it.

He asked if I had any leaking and I said only alittle bit. Mostly when I wait to long before I go and making it in time. Sometimes when I stand up alittle will come out but then that's it. But as far as it use to be flooding all the time no it's not like that anymore. I'm hoping it will continue to heal and when this bladder infection is over it will get better. I told myself that alittle may come out every now and than but that's better than the way it use to be. Maybe you have to take what you have and make the best of it.

I just get so scared the dam will break lose again and I'm back where I started. I have to learn to ease up and try not to worry.

I ask him about the itchy down there and that I would have to get another GYN and maybe talk with her about this and he said that alot of the time you may have that for a few more months while it's still healing. I don't know if it's dryness or maybe this infection has something to do with it.

Well hope everyone has a good day and if there is any news it's good news.


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