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I'm FED up!!! I'm FED up!!!

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Unread 01-22-2003, 03:23 PM
I'm FED up!!!


I'm sorry to be here whining, but I am soooo tired of this that I can hardly stand it anymore.

First...I was told I needed a hyst.........did that!...but STILL had the pain..........then I was told it was all in my head and I needed anti-depressants............did that and ...STILL the pain.......found out that I had a LARGE cyst (softball size) that needed to come out and a hernia that needed repaired........did that....and still the pain!!!

I asked Dr at my 6 week appt. on Monday if it was normal for me to still be feeling pain from the hernia.......I LOVE him...I do...but he said...No, there is no longer the hernia so NO you shouldnt have pain from it anymore.........OK, then why the pain still????

I am SOOO tired of being treated like a dam* drug addict that I could just spit. I'm sick of it!!!!....I STILL have the same pain and it is STILL in the same place. I'm beginning to think that it is something that I am just going to have to live with and I can't bare that thought! I was sooo hoping that Doc on Monday would say that it is still healing pain, at least that would set my mind at ease and I could hope for less pain along with more healing.

Call me a freak if you wish...but I STILL have my christmas tree up, I have been saying for 3 days that it was coming down, but I have this thing about having to clean before I work on taking the tree down but by the time I clean...I am pooped and hurting to much to take the tree down....so it is STILL up. Maybe I will just lave up until after NEXT Christmas.

Maybe I'm just having a bad day....but I'm tired of bad days and I want to feel better!

Sorry sisters, but I really AM fed up!!!

's to all!

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Unread 01-22-2003, 04:43 PM
My tree it still up too...

((((((((((Dawn)))))))))) Boy can I relate. I'm sick and tired too. Every surgery was going to be 'the' one. I've decided no more operations, unless it is something life threatening.

It could still be healing pains Hun. Give yourself a couple more weeks...and if the pain is still there I would seek out another opinion. Has anyone ever mentioned nerve damage to you? I've been recently diagnosed with it. At least I know what's going on. I still have Endo as well as several other illnesses that cause daily pain. Pain management has saved my life. I still can't do as many things as I used too...but at least the pain isn't as bad as before.

I'm sorry you are in so much pain. In a few weeks, if the pain persists...seek out other opinions. Rest for now...try to re-group. Then go see another Gyn, perhaps ask for a referral to a Neurologist. Then maybe go to Pain Management. I am shocked (in a good way) at the care I'm receiving that the pain clinic. They are running test after test to make sure they are leaving no stones unturned. It is amazing that they are finding all of these things wrong with me...when my previous docs told me my pain was all in my head. I'd like to gather them all in one room and listen to what my Nuero doc has to say. Perhaps they would treat future patients with more respect, and offer better medical care. Sorry...off on a tangent here. I guess your words really touced a nerve.

Rant anytime sister...we're here for you S and let us know how you are doing....
Unread 01-22-2003, 04:57 PM

I am sorry you are so frustrated and I can definitely see why. Continuing to have treatment and surgery and not getting relief would make any one have a bad day.

I was wondering if you were ever diagnosed with adhesions during any of your surgeries? Did they remove any at the time of surgery, etc.? They can be very painful if attached to certain areas, etc.

I know Sheri has done a lot of research on the adhesion issue so if you do a *search* you can find her long list of informational websites. Not that I am a DR or anything but I know surgeries can cause the pain to even increase if you develop multiple adhesions due to multiple surgeries.

Another post I have been reading talks about nerve damage and the pain associated with it and procedures they have to try and minimize this type of pain. I myself haven't done a lot of research on that but it might be worth checking into to get some relief.

You still have many avenues to try and find a solution and I feel for you having to have gone through so much so far w/o relief. Some sister out there might come up with some other ideas too. Don't give up, I believe you can find some type of relief even if it's through Pain Management Physician-and there would be nothing wrong with that. *Druggies* use drugs to escape the real world, individuals with medical needs are not abusing the drugs but enabling themselves pain relief so they can LIVE in the real world. IMHO: don't let any one make you feel any less of a person for needing pain relief you deserve it!

With that said, tomorrow can be better and we will all keep you in our prayers that you will be able to find some solid answers and get relief soon.

BTW: I worked with a lady that threw a bed sheet over her Christmas tree every year and put it in a closet. Hey, what ya know maybe you can save time decorating it next year(LOL).

HUGS and lots of prayers,
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Unread 01-22-2003, 09:28 PM
2nd opinion

Hun it sounds to me you need a second opinion!!

Unread 01-22-2003, 10:09 PM
Thanks for the support!!!

It is sooo badly needed right now.

I had "extensive" adhesions when I had my last surgery. My Dr expected my surgery to take about an hour and a half and 3 and a half hours later...I was out of surgery. My Dr said it took him 2 hours to cut through and remove adhesions so that he could get to the cyst and the hernia....In his surgical report, every time he used the word "adhesions" the word extensive was immediatly behind or before it. I don't understand how I got adhesions on the LEFT side when during my first surgery...I didn't have any work done on the left side? But I am only 6 weeks out of surgery...how could it be adhesions already?...and my Dr used an adhesion barrier this time. Could it be really be adhesions already? and enough to be causing this type of pain? It's just strange to me that my pain is ALWAYS in the SAME place. It feels like my left leg has a TIGHT rubber band around it that hooks somewhere in my pelvic region, low and to the left of my belly button.

I do see a PM Dr, have been seeing him for over 2 years now, up until now I have been seeing him for migraine headaches. I am very allergic to all anti-inflammatory drugs, not just upset tummy allergic but send me to the castle with hives, itching, swelling and can't breath allergic. I suffered with severe migraines for years before finding my PM dr and have found relief through him ever since, via narcotics, which I'm not proud of but being able to function has become more important to me than my pride. I had to make 2 trips to him in the last 2 weeks because I was in soo much pain that I literally couldn't see or think straight. He did thankfully, the angel that he is , treat me for the severe pelvic pain even though that is not what he usually sees me for.

Right now I am going to try to look at the bright side of things and tell myself that I am just not done healing yet and that ,with time, it will get better, but on days like today it is hard to keep a positive attitude.

I went to my gyn Monday for my 6 week check-up and my gyn gave me a script for perocet, which I took by the pharmacy to be filled while I took my girls for lunch. When I returned to pick up my RX's.....they rang them up and it came to a whopping $138.00. I have excellent RX insurance coverage and a script can cost me no more than $25.00 max! So I refused to pay and asked why it had'nt been put through my insurance company and I was told that they wouldn't cover it, it was too soon and if I wanted them I could pay cash. I told them that I still had meds left from my PM Dr and I would pick it up later when the insurance approved it. Everyone at the pharmacy treated me as if I was a druggy and said it would need to be okayed by both Dr's.....if I were trying to hide something I would have paid for the scripts and been out of there. I'm just SOOOO tired of being treated like a bad person because I am in pain. Am I the only one who gets this attitude? I'd like to take the drug seekers in this world and kick their butts because they are making my life hell!

If this is adhesion pain...there is no way that I can continue to have surgeries to remove them if they are going to return this quickly. I have also wondered about nerve damage because I have been numb from about 1/4 of the top of my thigh all the way up past my incison (including the left side of my labia) and I keep getting this feeling that there is a lit cigarette sitting on my thigh,,.....it gets so bad sometimes (I am a smoker) that I actually have to look down to see if I've dropped a hot ash. The pain I am feeling mostly is still the deep internal pain though...when I lift things or try to push things and even when I have a bowel movement..and sometimes even walking is a causes it. ANY type of physical exertion seems to bring on this pain and it is ALWAYS in the same place that it has always been in.

Sorry to be here again whining so soon, but it really helps to feel like there are actually people listening to me. I really need to be more assertive with my Dr, but I just find that hard to do. I feel like HE is the Doc and he knows what he is talking about, but when I get home I kick myself in the butt for NOT being more assertive. I really hate the idea of looking for yet another doc, it took me soo long to find this one, I even had to travel out of state to get him!

Thanks again ladies, your support and caring is ever so helpful!

Lots of 's to all!

Unread 01-22-2003, 10:26 PM
Sorry to hear you're having a hard time

I'm so sorry to hear you're still having such a hard time, Dawn. I know it's a real drag to have your health issues take up so much of your life. You know, six weeks is not a long time to heal from surgery and you will probably experience a few more changes - let's hope for the better - before you are completely healed. I can understand your concern about adhesions since you seem to have formed them so easily before. But I think (just my uneducated opinion here) that it's probably too early to draw any conclusions about that. It must be VERY frustrating to still have pain. That's one of my fears - have my surgery and have it turn out that a lot of my pain is not cured.

Sending many healing thoughts your way . . .

Unread 01-23-2003, 04:14 AM
I'm FED up!!!

awwwww Dawn sweetie...

I hate to sound like a broken record dear....BUT It really could still be healing pain.

I am 12 weeks post yesterday!!! and I have to say I am still having the intial healing part from this surgery honey. And you say you are up and cleaning?????????????? What have you been doing? you need to be resting honey or it WILL take longer to heal. ( playing here ) Honey I had pain in my tummy and on my left side up until just the middle of last week. I STILL get pain in my left side where all the work was done if I do to much.. ( Hint hint) You just had a major surgery on top of one how long ago? It's going to take a bit more to heal this time. Every time I had surgery it took a little longer each time to get over the INITIAL healing period.

While you are up and cleaning you are not giving your tender tissues time to heal....your body is reacting to the mesh just as it would to any forgien object it's not used to having in there. How many of our docs told us after our hysts that "we should be fine" at 6 weeks??? We know better on THAT one now...When I went to a general surgen to talk about getting my hernia fixed ( before he found out about my pelvic probs) he said it could take up to 4-6 months to not feel the mesh and my body reacting to it if it was something he decided to use.

Are you lifting? Vacuming? doing laundry already? All of this could be aggravating it sweetie...try doing absoloutely nothing for a few days...soak in a hot tub with some (or a hysterita ) and give yourself just a tad more time before thinking the worst. Like I said..at 12 weeks now I still can't do a lot of things that don't aggravate my belly button where my hernia was....

Please Please take some time for YOU....

( I'm gonna worry about you all day long now... lol <can see Dawn bent over in pain running the vacum>

Love to ya sweetie...

Unread 01-23-2003, 09:53 AM
Thanks Ladies,

Dawn, Thank you for talking some sense into my head.....you are probably right! Yes, I am back to doing all of the cleaning and doing the laundry and vacuuming. I can't help it, especially when I just had the first surgery only 6 months ago....I just feel like my family has been taking care of me for too long. Now this surgery 6 weeks ago , so that is at least 3 out of the last 6 months that I have been "recouperating"....I guess I'm just tired of doing it. I'm beginning to feel useless.

It doesn't help that my dr said that I would need to take it easy for 6 weeks and my family knows that 6 weeks is over....I'm beginning to feel like a burden. The pain is not too bad in the mornings....although I am a little sore, it's more so toward the mid afternoon and evenings that it gets really bad. So I guess that answers my own queston...I am overdoing it. Now how to break it to my family that I can't be supermom just yet.

I guess what really threw me into the black hole of doubt is when I went to see doc and he said you can't be having pain from the hernia.....you no longer have a hernia. I just needed to be reminded that dr's DON"T know everything. Maybe I would have got a different response from the Dr who actually fixed the hernia.. after all ....my gyn. didnt do that part of the surgery....he doesnt repair hernias. What you said about the mesh being there made alot of sense ....you're right...I DO still have a foreign body in there and that could be what I'm feeling. As you can tell I am trying to convince myself here. So far it's working.

What you said about me vacuuming made me laugh because just yesterday when I was vacuuming....I had to vacuum a small area and take a break and then vacuum some more, it took me about 30 minutes just to vacuum the livingroom. LOL

Thanks for your support, I will try to take it a little easier, We may just have to look at that tree a little longer.

Unread 01-23-2003, 10:03 AM
I'm FED up!!!

I just read your story and I could cry for you I hope you find some answers soon.

The thing that strikes me when I read posts like yours, and you're not alone, is the way we are treated by the medical profession. If they don't know the answer we're 'hysterical' or its 'all in your head' or 'depressed'. I ask you ladies, if a man had constant debilitating pain would he be fobbed off like that? We all know the answer. It makes me so angry.

The worst part is, when you feel as low as this, it's hard to fight your corner. Is there anyone who can come along with you and support you? I found taking my dh useful - when the doctor tried to say I was neurotic he got angry!! and boy does it work!!

Huge hugs - I really hope something good comes your way soon - you deserve it
Unread 01-23-2003, 12:35 PM
I'm FED up!!!

(((Dawn33))) I sure wish you were feeling better sweetie!!! Please know that you are definitely not alone!! I am fed up too -- for myself and every single one of us here that continue to suffer daily and get nothing but a shrug or questioning look from the medical professionals!! You know most of my saga and how it relates so, I won't go into a pity party for myself here. Know that you are in my thoughts. I'm that we all find some answers and relief soon.

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