On the "Waiting" list and boyfriend has concerns

Hi Everyone! This is my first post. I found the website yesterday and I love it. I am on the waiting list at Kaiser and have been told that I will not be scheduled for 6-8 months. Yikes!! That's a long time. Anyway, it gives me time to think and decide about whether or not I really want to do this. I have fibroids, ovarian cysts and I have cramps every day. They never go away! I had a Depro Provera injection last month. The first couple of days I had terrible pain but it seems to have leveled now. I still have lots of cramping, but missed my last period. I felt like I was on my period, but there was no blood flow.

Oh, I'm rambling.........anyway...........my boyfriend doesn't want me to have surgery. He said he will support whatever decision I make, but we both have concerns about sex afterwards. I am 44 and enjoy a very active sex life. I have seen the pros and cons about having my cervix removed. Dr. is planning a TAH and will try to leave my ovaries. I've had lots of abdominal scar tissue in the past, so I'm not too hopeful of keeping them. Anyway, do they always take the cervix with a TAH? My uterus is enlarged and he cannot do the surgery vaginally as I had hoped. I'm sorry if I'm going on, its just that there's really been no one to talk to and I need some input, advice, encouragement, whatever you can give me.

Thanks, Geoqueen

TAH they take the cervix. I had that done 5 weeks ago just about myself.

I still havent got the go ahead on intercourse (im pushed to 8 weeks for baths and sex because of complications)

But allowed um external stimulation before then. I can tell you its not half bad

I do miss the uterine contraction part of an orgasm but it appears my body is making up for it in other ways (more sensativity and the goodie bits lol)
Also having the cervix removed means no more pap smears needed to be done yearly. No worry about cervical cancer.
And in my case i had an abnormally long cervix associated with my prolapse and it interfered with bowel movements.

So far i havent got any cons to tell ya

Good luck

Wow that is a long time to have to wait for surgery, how come?? Well it gives you lots of time to research. I had a TAH on 2/24 and my doctor and I did alot of talking before hand. I decided to have my ovaries and cervix removed. Before I decided though my doctor said to be in tune with my body during sex. Some women feel they need to have their cervix to have an orgasm. Some women cannot have an orgasm without their uterous. ( the uterous contracts during an orgasm) and some women need that feeling in order to orgasm. Not everyone is the same, I found that I really didn't even feel my uterous contract (and believe me my husband and I made sure) I didn't want to make the biggest mistake of my life. I am 40 and have been married for 19 years. Yes believe it or not my husband and I have a great sex life and I wasn't about to give it all up. Experiment, research and then talk to your doctor and see what is right for you, I myself didn't want to have this kind of surgery ever again, so removal of the ovaries and cervix was my choice. I haven't had intercourse yet but I am confident about my decision. Be sure you are confident with yours and all will work out well. Best of luck lmack

If you are having an abdominal incision the surgery can be done without removing the cervix. The cervix must come out if the surgery is done vaginally.

As you know, there is much controversy regarding whether or not leaving the cervix makes a difference during sex. It's a personal decision and you need to weigh the pros and cons. I'd like to say, however, that if you have an active and good sex life now the chances are good that you would continue to have one even with removal of the cervix. I think the point about paying attention to your body now is a good one. And I am shocked that you have such a long wait.

Joselle

Hi

Welcome to HysterSisters! There is tons of info, advice, support, and s when you need them.

	Quote:
Anyway, do they always take the cervix with a TAH?

The term "total" in TAH means the entire uterus. A partial, or supracervical hyst would be a SAH. And yes it is possible to leave the cervix, that would not be a TAH. It's something to talk over with your DR.

Best wishes!

I also have to have an abdominal hysterectomy. Here in the UK where we have the 'wonderful' NHS, I'm also faced with at least a 6 month waiting list for surgery. I have had 5 caesarean sections,so vaginal surgery is a no no for me as well.
The doctor has told me that they will leave my cervix and ovaries, as they are quite healthy,and because of my scar tissue, it might be difficult to remove the cervix without causing damage elsewhere!
I have been told that it should make no difference to sex whatsoever, although a couple of my partners friends (male) beg to differ, and keep telling him not to let me have the surgery.
I am 41 years old and I have an abnormally enlarged uterus and multiple fibroids causing a hardly ever ending period and a lot of pain, as well as anaemia associated with the blood loss, needing iron tablets and periodical iron injections.
I will be interested to read replies to this question.

Good Luck



Vicki

I think the thing that bothered me about this thread...was the part about the men!

Excuse me..but have ANY of them EVER had to deal with chronic, debillitating pain and/or bleeding? Nope. Have any of them suffered weight gain, bloating, mood swings and associated joys of periods? Nope. Any of these guys ever had fibroids pressing on the bladder, causing incontinence? Nope.

How would they even know?

Bloomin' men. If these guys really do love and respect us, then they'll also respect the medical decisions we make for our own quality of life. I'm sorry, if I sound mean...I really don't mean to....but honestly, that attitude from these guys is just disgusting. Just had to edit, and add something my husband said...."our sex life is better than ever..because YOU feel better". He couldn't have put it better

Wishing you all strength and blessings,

Tess

(who had her hyst at 28, and has a darn fine sex life, thankyou very much )

Thank you all so much for the encouragement and advice. Yes, 6+ months is a long time to wait. Kaiser is just really backed up here with Hysterectomies. My Dr. is trying to push them thru sooner, but he said to be patient. The other thing is that I will only get a weeks notice when they schedule my surgery, so I have to make sure I have all my ducks in a row in plenty of time. My partner is feeling better than when the decision was first made, but he is still cautious. Plans to take time off work and move into my place for a while and all that. He really is a sweetheart.

Keep the replies coming!

Geoqueen

:

Hi Geoqueen,
I'm having a SAH, BSO ... abdominal surgery through an old vertical c-section incision, taking the uterus, tubes, and both ovaries, leaving the cervix if healthy. My Doc (female GYN/Oncologist) actually encouraged me to keep at least one ovary if healthy ... my DH and I weighed the pros and cons. I chose to take both ovaries out. My is big on alternative HRT, which is good. I don't want to worry about the severe endo growing back..ever. I don't want to worry about having my ovaries out at a later date (I have a severe bleeding disorder that makes surgeries even more risky than usual). Turns out mine were hardly working when we got the hormone level tests back. My Doc put me on a 3-month dose of Lupron before surgery to thin the lining, see if the pain went away from endo, and let me experience menopause. It's not too bad. I was already having flashes and night sweats ... just didn't realize it was from almost no hormones!

After talking with the Doc and researching, and reading, reading, reading on this site... I chose to keep my cervix. I don't want to worry about prolapse. There is the chance that it will help to keep my vagina moist during sex and possibly have some nerve endings related to sex. I have never had a bad or unusual PAP test, so I'm keeping my cervix.
If you do a search on this site on "keep cervix" you will find a ton of post with lots of great info! There are some awesome s here to help.
Good luck with YOUR decisions (not your BF's friends decisions).
s
Susi

that had some information on some studies done on women and types of orgasms. A little bit of a tough read but has some interesting ideas in it.

http://www.genmedhealth.com/main/phe...xresponce.html

I've decided to keep my cervix, but according to this study, clitoral stimulation accounts for most orgasms (and a hyst doesn't bother than) and "cervical tapping" accounts for the lowest percentage of orgasms. Of course, this study also said that women with fibroids experience more vaginal sensitivity than well intact women. Whatever on that, nobody asked me. I'm so full of enlarged uterus, grapefruit size fibroids, bladder, unhappy intestines that while I still can get turned on, penetration can be uncomfortable with abdominal tenderness afterwards.

This study backs up reports from those that have removed their cervix and still have great Os.