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scared to death scared to death

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  #1  
Unread 03-07-2003, 03:41 PM
scared to death

I have 4 children the youngerst is 4 months, how am i going to be able to take care of them. i have a 10, 3 1/2, 21 months and 4 months. what am i going to do if i cant pick them up to take care of them. my surgery is on 3-14 and i am really worried.
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  #2  
Unread 03-07-2003, 04:00 PM
scared to death

Hon, you've got your hands full. to you. Do you have any family nearby that can help you with the kids for the first week or so? I don't know from experience, but from all I've read on here so far, it will be a while before you can pick them up. You're really gonna need some help with them. You'll be in my prayers.
God bless you.
  #3  
Unread 03-07-2003, 04:05 PM
scared to death

Oh (((Annabelle))),
Sounds like you've got your hands full! You didn't say exactly what surgery you're having, but for most hysters, there is a lfting restriction. Up until my 6 week check-up, I was told not to lift anything heavier than a gallon of milk!
Hopefully your DH will be able to be home with you for at least the first week after surgery. If possible can you get someone else- Mom, Mother-in-law, sister friend, to come stay with you after that? If you live near a college, you might be able to get a college student to come in and help you out for a few weeks or if you're associated with a church, they may be able to come in and give you a hand. Have you mentionned this your Dr.? He/She might be able to arrange home health care/aid for you through your insurance.
You have to remember that as much as your kids need you - they need you healthy and well! Which you're not going to be if you don't allow yourself adequate recovery. You only want to do this type of surgery once! And from I've learned on this board, too much, too soon leads to a lot more complicated problems!
Good Luck!
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  #4  
Unread 03-07-2003, 04:07 PM
(( ))

I have 4 children also ages 12,8,6,4. I am not going to have much help but mine are a bit older. Is there any way that some home nursing can help??? Can you hire someone to just come and be with the kids??
  #5  
Unread 03-07-2003, 04:56 PM
scared to death

Dear Annabell,

You definitely have alot on your mind. Wow, you're blessed to have these children. The older one can help some, if he/she is willing to. Do you have a husband? If so, maybe he can take off work for at least one week to help you at home. You need help, for at least 1-2 weeks postop. You'll be sore, tender, need lots of rest, naps,lots of fluids,good nutrition,small walks around the house, but easy does it - no lifting,carrying children or stuff,pushing carts or anything, no laundry,no bending over,no mopping,sweeping,vacuuming, nothing strenuous - like changing beds, etc., no shopping, either. Easy does it, and you'll heal so much quicker. When you ovedo, you have more pain and possible complications. Please get some help. Talk to your doctor, his nurse, your neighbors, family, friends, church members to try and arrange to have someone in with you for at least 2 wks, who can wait on you, help with kids/meals/housework,etc. You will need it, sweet lady. Keep us posted on what you find out. There may be a community agency who can help you, as well. Or if there's a college in town, you may call there and see if you can hire a student for a couple of weeks to help you out. You're worth it, and so is your healing time. God bless, I'll be thinking of you and praying for you, hon. Post often to let us know how you're doing and how the help situation is coming around. Come to chat sometime, it's fun and supportive..
DebraDeeH

this is my opinion;always get medical advice from a doctor
  #6  
Unread 03-07-2003, 05:06 PM
A few tips...

I had a similar situation when I was on bedrest with my last two pg's.

Do try to get as much help as possible... Neighbors, friends, relatives, church members, etc.

A few other hints:

***For your middle 2, if they need some cuddles, make sure you are sitting/laying down (with strategically placed pillows protecting you, and let them crawl up next to you. Pat the seat or bed next to you and tell them to sit there, they will.

***Keep a chair or step-stool in the kitchen so perschoolers can get their own drinks, snacks, etc.

***Realize and accept that the kids are gonna "get away with" a lot of stuff that you wouldn't otherwise allow (extra snacks, more TV or videos, special privleges, less perfectly nutritious meals, etc.)

***Buy milk in 1/2 gallons, or have hubby pour it into a smaller sized container, and then 4 y/o can pour his and younger sibs milk on cereal, in cups, etc.

***Have hubby make cold lunches for you all before he goes in the AM. Then let the kids have a picnic on the floor next to where you are resting.

***Have the 10 yo or even the 4 yo hand you the baby after you are sitting or reclining and covered with pillows.

***If you have a baby swing, it can be a lifesaver!!!

*** A baby sling or snuggli distributes the weight on your shoulder and does not strain your tummy as much. (I had contractions if I stressed my abdomen at all, but not if my 1 y/o was in the baby sling on my hip. Boy I got a sore shoulder tho)

*** Move essentials to shelves and cupboards where the younger kids can reach (i.e. cereal, crackers, juice boxes, cups, bowls, paper plates, etc.) and get stuff for themselves.

***Use the stroller, even in the house to move the baby from room to room with you instead of carrying, and sit before you remove baby from seat.

That's all I can think of right now, I'll post more later if I come up with others.

Like I said, this was not after surgery, but I had to be very careful, no lifting anything over 3 lbs, etc. I did have a few times that I had to do something I shouldn't but I learned to modify a lot too.
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